


Langst One-Shots

by neki31415



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Altean Lance (Voltron), Bisexual Lance (Voltron), Blind Lance (Voltron), Child Abandonment, Child Abuse, Child Death, Child Neglect, Childhood Trauma, Deaf Lance (Voltron), Depressed Lance (Voltron), Fear of Death, Galra Keith (Voltron), Gay Keith (Voltron), Gay Shiro (Voltron), Homesick Lance (Voltron), Insecure Lance (Voltron), Lance (Voltron) is a Mess, Loss of Control, Loss of Limbs, Loss of Parent(s), Loss of Trust, M/M, Murder, Parent/Child Incest, Past Sexual Abuse, Self Confidence Issues, Self-Destruction, Self-Doubt, Self-Esteem Issues, Self-Harm, Self-Hatred, Self-Sacrifice, Sexual Abuse, Space Dad Shiro (Voltron), Space Mom Allura (Voltron), Suicide, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-05
Updated: 2019-03-28
Packaged: 2019-06-22 08:50:37
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 27
Words: 54,983
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15578178
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/neki31415/pseuds/neki31415
Summary: Nobody knew! How could they have never figured it out?! Lance could barely even believe it. And now, now that they found out, they don't act the same. They act as though Lance is broken. Yes, of course, he was broken, and he knew that, and it sent him through a fit of depression every time he thought about it. But they didn't act that way... and now they do.





	1. Waste of Perfectly Good Sight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nobody knew! How could they have never figured it out?! Lance could barely even believe it. And now, now that they found out, they don't act the same. They act as though Lance is broken. Yes, of course, he was broken, and he knew that, and it sent him through a fit of depression every time he thought about it. But they didn't act that way... and now they do.

 

“Oh, shit!” Lance’s voice carried through the coms as he cursed. There was an unearthly scream, a gunfire followed by a bunch of panting.

“Lance? You okay, buddy?” Shiro called. There was no answer. “Lance? Talk to me!”

“I’m good,” Lance yelled through the coms, still panting as though he were a dog who’d been stuck in 150-degree weather for a few hours. “Just was caught off guard for a sec.”

Lance put a finger against the bridge of his nose and felt a thick liquid seep onto it. He could barely feel the sting that accompanied the touch. He definitely had a bad cut, but how bad? There was a loud clanging a few feet away from him and he readied a stance to blast the alien sky high. Another clank and footsteps from a few feet to the left sent Lance spiraling around and pulling the trigger to his gun. He heard the body fall to the floor and the last dying breath escapes its body.

“I’ve got the code!” Pidge screamed through the coms, sending Lance’s ears through a fit of ringing. Going from hearing the smallest of noises to hearing the screaming of his teammate always sent a burning sensation through his brain. And the new wound that was on his face didn’t seem to help much. He could feel the blood trickling down his nose and into his mouth, a growing metallic taste pilling into his 4 senses.

“Alright, let’s get out of here,” Shiro ordered before a groan ripped through the coms. Shiro sounded like he just got a wound of epic proportions as well by the size of that groan. A growl followed and a scream of some high pitched alien.

“Shiro, you good, man?” Lance called to his childhood hero.

“I’m fine,” Shiro groaned. “Let’s hurry back.”

“Roger,” Hunk called his usual sign of understanding. It started as being funny since he’d say it every time but now it just became annoying.

“I’m already in my Lion,” Keith said nonchalantly, gaining a scoff from Lance. 

“On my way,” Pidge informed.

“Good,” Shiro sighed, trying to sound less hurt than he obviously was. Lance felt sorry for Shiro. Sure, Lance had an injury too, but he could barely even feel it. Wait, that wasn’t a good thing, was it?

Lance started running the way he came, feeling the mental bond between him and his lion getting stronger. That was always his way of directions. Along with running his hand against the wall to make sure he didn’t run into anything. It was a quick trip back with no need to use his Bayard.

“Alright, Blue, how bad is this cut, huh?” Lance asked as he stood in front of his beloved Lion. He concentrated and looked through his Lion’s eyes at himself. He’d never looked at himself before, but he knew for a fact that the long slash going all the way across his face, slicing right through his eyes, was not supposed to be there. And damn, that cut was deep and bloody. “Wow, that’s not good at all, is it?” he laughed as he walked closer, his Lions’ mouth opening so he’d be allowed entry.

“I’m out,” Pidge announced a slight whining in the background.

“Same here,” Hunk added.

“Just got to my Lion,” Lance put out as he sat inside his seat and connected with his Lion in order to see. The world that he was always surrounded by was so beautiful; it was sad that he wasn’t able to see it more often. “How we doing, Shiro?”

“I’m on my way out too,” Shiro grunted out. His voice broke in the middle of the sentence. He was definitely in a bad way. Lance could feel the blood dripping down his neck now; he really wasn’t in a much better position.

“Blue, you mind piloting on your own for a bit?” Lance asked his precious Lion, who gave a soft purr of confirmation. Lance jumped out of his seat, losing eye connection with Blue. The world was so dark in his eyes. He sighed as he pulled out the first aid kit that he knew was in the box in the corner. He knew the shapes of every single thing inside of Blue and he could identify them with a light touch.

Opening the kit, he pulled out the soft gauze and long bandage. He wrapped the gauze tightly around his eyes and nose, not caring about the hair that he was rapping along with it. Then he put the bandage over that, wrapping it around and around before tying it down.

Doing this didn’t change anything for him, but he knew that at least one person would be surprised that he could move around like normal even with a whole bunch of cloth over his eyes. He never told anyone that he was born blind, but he assumed that most of them would’ve noticed. After all, he couldn’t read and he could barely write. Sure, he could act normal, but there were still the things like making eye contact with somebody was impossible.

He took a piece of the gauze and wiped at the extra blood that had been dripped down his face and neck. Then he sat back down in his chair and reached through the bond in order to pilot his dear Lion once again.

They got back and Lance decided to stay in his Lion until everyone had left. He usually did this, so that he could catch a glimpse at his teammates for a few seconds. He wanted to take every second he could to see whatever he could. As he thought before, the world was so beautiful. 

First one out was Hunk- with his dark skin and center-parted hair held out of his face by an orange headband. His hugs were amazing, because of his big, strong build. He stopped just a few inches from Lance’s view before running back, yelling Shiro’s name.

Next thing Lance knew, he saw Hunk and Pidge holding up Shiro, who was bleeding profusely out of his leg. Shiro’s face was etched with pain as he jumped to try and keep up with his human crutches. Then came Keith, who always surprised Lance when he got a chance to see him.

Keith’s voice was so deep and masculine, etched with constant superiority and the showing of his quick temper. But he was just a small teenager. His eyebrows still held that quick temper and so did the way he walked, but he really just looked… small. And he was adorable!

He looked really upset as he walked over to his adopted “father” if you could call Shiro that. 

“Be careful out there, you idiot!” Keith growled and Lance chuckled. In the back of Lance’s mind, he wished to be able to see all of them during all of their encounters. They all looked different from the way they talked, although their footsteps betrayed them, telling Lance how much they weighed on an average. Keith and Pidge were about the same weight, although Keith’s footsteps were a little more stompy. Pidge’s footsteps were as light as a feather.

“Chill out, man,” Hunk grunted as he pulled Shiro closer in order to catch more of his weight. Pidge ended up letting go since she was too short to be able to be of any help now. Before long, Shiro’s feet were completely off the ground and Hunk was holding him up, no problem.

Lance decided to walk out at that moment. Blue’s mouth opened and he slipped down the ramp. He had already forgotten about the fact that he had cloth covering his unseeing eyes.

“Everyone leaving without me?” Lance asked as he ran towards the footsteps. The only footsteps he couldn’t hear were Shiro’s, but they were replaced by a soft skid. “What happened to you out there, Shiro?”

“Just got caught off guard by one of those ugly purple aliens with the spears,” Shiro laughed before gritting his teeth. “It’s not that bad, I’ll live.”

“It seems pretty bad to me,” Lance grunted as he finally caught up with his comrades. That’s when he heard the footsteps stop and everyone’s breathing stop completely. Lance remembered that he had his eyes covered as soon as he heard the deadly silence.

“What the hell happened to you?!” Shiro gasped. “You… you didn’t say you got injured! And why are you covering your eyes?! How are you even being able to see right now?!”

Lance laughed softly. Nobody said anything but just awaited his answer. Did none of them know? “There’s no time to worry about that right now. Let’s get you into a healing pod. You’re bleeding a really lot!” He could feel the slipperiness on the floor from Shiro’s blood under his shoes.

Nobody said anything but did as Lance said, walking Shiro to the healing pods. 

Neither Coran nor Allura asked Lance anything about how he could see as they took off the gauze and bandages. They quickly cleaned his wound without a question slipping from their lips, but the question obviously on the tip of their tongue. After cleaning it, they threw him in a healing pod, just like Shiro. 

He fell out of the healing pod an hour after being put it, a dull ache radiating from his face. Of course, his body hadn’t gotten the memo that he was healed, it’s not normal for a wound like that to be healed in the span of an hour. He opened his eyes, the familiar blackness all to be seen.

There were people breathing all around him, but there were no words spoken by anyone. He just turned his head back and forth, waiting patiently for anything.

“Lance?” Coran’s voice was soft and calming. He had an oddly sad demeanor in his voice. “You doing okay?”

“Yeah?” Lance answered with uncertainty. He just got out of the healing pod, so why wouldn’t he be? “Why wouldn’t I be?” There was a long silence, filled with confusion and uncertainty.

“Can you… see me?” Coran asked, sounding on the verge of tears. Lance was taken aback by the question.

“I don’t understand. Do you not know?” Lance asked. Who else didn’t know?

“Know what?” Coran’s voice was filled with confusion. 

“Someone has to know, right? Pidge, you’re smart. Don’t you know?” Lance could tell the difference between a girl’s breathing and a boy’s, so he knew that she was definitely there. The Alteans breathed slower than a human, so he definitely knew when Pidge was around.

“Know what? Lance, what are you talking about?” Pidge asked. “Lance, how are you acting so calm when you got an injury that should’ve completely blinded you?”

Lance was completely baffled.

“Nobody knew this entire time?” Lance asked himself, forgetting for a moment that there were others in the room. “Damn, I’m a good actor!”

“What are you talking about?” Hunk asked. Lance just laughed to himself.

“Or you all just assumed I was an idiot from the beginning,” Lance added after a moment. “You know, that’s probably it.”

“Lance! What the fuck are you talking about?!” Keith exploded. “You’re supposed to be blind right now! Explain yourself!”

“I am blind!” Lance screamed as the humor in the situation disappeared. Now he was pissed. Sure, nobody ever noticed when he did anything right or noticed when he was trying to help them, but not noticing something like this! They’ve been in space, living together for almost a full year now!

Everyone stopped talking, just waiting for the continuation of what he was saying. Lance sighed after a moment, trying to bring back some of his composure.

“Of course I’m blind. How could none of you have noticed?” Lance groaned, running his fingers through his hair. “I’ve been blind this entire time!”

“There’s no way…” Keith began, fury in his voice.

“Shut up!” Lance screamed at the mullet head. He was pissed! More than pissed even! How could they have never noticed?! “Seriously, none of you noticed.”

“You couldn’t’ve been blind. You pilot a Lion,” Pidge whispered, trying to click the situation in her mind. 

“Yes, and my Lion has eyes!” Lance growled. “I see through her eyes, you idiots! Just cause I can pilot a GIANT SPACE CAT doesn’t mean that I can see!” Everyone’s breathing stopped for a moment. “What in the fucking hell were you all thinking of me before this?! Did you think I was some idiot who ran into walls for fun?! Did you ever wonder why I couldn’t read or write anything?! Oh, wait! You probably assumed that’s because I’m stupid or I was just trying to get out of doing something hard or something! Am I right?!” This was the loudest anyone had ever heard him and they were all terrified. Tears started to slip from his unseeing eyes as he finished screaming. “Shit,” he whispered before running out of the room.

Tears fell from every eye in the room as the words they’d heard sunk in. Coran and Hunk started bawling their eyes out, Pidge close behind in the contest of how much they could cry. Allura was hugging the space mice, letting silent tears fall as she thought. Keith was holding back as best he could, a few tears accidentally slipping down his cheeks. The only dry eye in the entire castle was Shiro’s unknowing eyes.

“How could he possibly have been blind this entire time?” Allura choked out, forcing back the sobs. “There’s no way. He’s always acted as though he had the best sight!”

“Yeah, he just ran out of that door. There’s no way someone without sight could do that,” Hunk sobbed.

“Well, we know for a fact that he’s definitely blind with the injury that he sustained during the mission. Which means that it is possible for someone without sight to be able to run around without any assistance,” Coran said, the last of his sobs finally subsiding. “But it must take years and years of practice to be able to do something like that. How long could he have been blind in order to do everything anyone with sight could do?”

“How could I have never noticed? I’ve known him for years! We’ve been best friends since he moved to America! And yet I never knew!” Hunk sobbed, clutching onto Pidge with everything he had.

“I’ve known him for a few years. And I’m supposed to be the smart one. I should’ve known,” Pidge sighed. “But he really doesn’t… ACT blind at all!”

“He does have a point with the refusing to read or write anything and the running into walls a lot when we first got here,” Keith added to the conversation with his memories. He did just assume Lance was just stupid and klutzy. He never once thought that he couldn’t see.

Shiro fell from the healing pod after that thought was put out. As soon as he was recuperated, they brought him up to speed on the new development involving Lance. And he was just as surprised as they were.

“Lance?” Shiro asked. “You’re saying that idiot has actually been blind this entire time?!”

They all nodded. Lance walked in seconds later. He had tear tracks stained on his face and the usual smile was gone. But the anger was gone.

“I’m sorry for how I acted before,” Lance sighed. “If I wanted to be sure you all knew, I should’ve told you. I guess I just assumed that someone would’ve noticed.” Nobody said anything. “I understand if you wanted me off the team after hearing about this. Shiro, they told you already. I trust that you’ll make the right decision and get rid of me. I was never suited as a Paladin, to begin with.”

“Woah, woah, woah,” Shiro shook his head. It struck him that Lance couldn’t see his action. “Nobody’s getting rid of you. You’ve always been a great help to the team, even though you’ve been blind the entire time. That’s actually amazing that you could hold your own weight without one of your senses.”

“But…” Lance sighed. “I’ve ruined countless missions because I can’t see. I’m not pulling my own weight. I’m just pulling all of you guys back.”

“Lance…” Coran walked over and gave Lance a much-needed hug. Lance grasped at it like a lifeline. “We aren’t getting rid of you, whether you want us to or not. You’re amazing to be able to pilot and fight enemies and run around normally with such a handicap! We need someone so amazing around.”

Lance laughed, putting out a, “Yeah, I’m pretty awesome.”

Everyone rolled their eyes, suddenly gaining the realization that he couldn’t see it. He’d never seen any of their actions. He’d never seen them at all. Pidge sniffled.

“May I ask how long have you been missing one of your 5 senses?” Coran asked, rubbing Lance’s back.

“I was born like this,” Lance answered simply. Everyone was in shock for a moment. “For a while, my parents wanted to try getting some robotic eyes or something. They really didn’t want a blind kid. But it wasn’t my eyes that were the problem, it was my brain. It was something no doctor had ever seen before and therefore, there was nothing that could be done about it. So, basically, as soon as I opened my eyes for the first time, everything was pitch black.”

Once again, there were a lot of teary eyes. Now Lance’s were the only dry ones. And when he heard the sniffling, he laughed.

“Hey, it’s not that sad!” he pulled away from Coran’s embrace. “Do you think it’s sadder to be born blind or to grow blind?” Nobody spoke. “Honestly, I would’ve hated losing my sight after I had it. To be able to see such a beautiful world and have it stripped away from me just seems… tragic. To never have it, it’s like you don’t know what you’re missing so you don’t feel super bad about it.

“Although, thanks to Blue, I have been able to see some things. So I guess I get my sight stripped away from me every time I leave Blue,” Lance laughed.

“If you’ve been able to see through Blue’s eyes the entire time, how come you failed that training where we blacked out your helmets?” Allura asked. She distinctly remembered the little feud between Lance and Keith during that training exercise. She was too busy with Shiro’s success that her memory of the outcome of the feud was foggy. She could’ve sworn that they both face planted into the sand.

“I didn’t,” Lance laughed. Everyone froze. They all could’ve sworn he face planted with Keith during that exercise. “Yeah, you guys were paying attention to Shiro, who’d pulled up right before me. And I stopped right after I pulled up instead of going over the landscape. You never told us to do that, so I assumed all I had to do was pull up before I hit the ground.”

“Why didn’t you tell us?” Allura asked.

“Believe it or not, I actually don’t brag about most things,” Lance laughed. “Bragging about real things makes me feel big-headed.” There was a pause where everyone was trying to understand that logic. “Don’t question it!”

The next days were emotional ones for everyone, including Lance. The crew was constantly trying to “help” him with the normal things that he’d learned to do a long time ago, making him feel just as useless as he probably should’ve been. Pidge would read to him random things, Hunk would walk him through the hallways as if he hadn’t already made a mental map of the castle a long time ago, Keith would go easy on him during training, Shiro and Allura didn’t yell at him when he messed up, and Coran didn’t ask him to help clean or anything.

“Lance! What the hell are you doing?! Are you blind?!” that was the first time Lance had been yelled at in weeks. They were on another mission and Lance was supposed to be their sniper. With his amazing hearing, he could usually pinpoint an enemy from miles away. But there were always a few slip-ups. When Shiro yelled that, Lance snorted into the coms and everyone went silent.

“Sorry, Shiro,” Lance said through a fit of laughter. “I got him, right?” He had missed the first time but when he shot again, he heard the thud of a body. It was either that he hit the enemy or he hit one of his friends. That was always something that scared him when he was shooting; it’s too easy for him to accidentally take one of his friends for an enemy.

“I’m sorry, Lance. I shouldn’t have said that. You did, well done,” Shiro sighed.

“Don’t apologize,” Lance answered back. “I love feeling like we’re back to before I told you all.”

Lance heard more footsteps coming from where all of the enemies had flooded in before. They didn’t sound like anybody’s footsteps that he knew so he quickly shot them down.

“Amazing! Great job, Lance!” Allura praised and Lance sighed sadly.

They’d never go back to the way they were. They will always think of him as a burden, won’t they? And it hurt for Lance because he thought the same. How could a blind boy be anything more than a burden?


	2. Just a Game

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This game seemed all fun and games to the three Paladins. But they didn't realize what it was doing to their crazy, "always happy" Blue Paladin. Whoever would have thought, even knowing him well, that he was so upset?  
> It was just a game! But the end result wasn't.

“Let’s play a game!” Hunk, Pidge, and Shiro were just sitting on the sofa in the main room, bored out of their mind. Keith was out training and Lance was… somewhere. The Alteans were running around, working to fix a few of the castle defenses that seemed to be constantly malfunctioning. 

Shiro was the first to think up the idea of playing a game. After all, Shiro felt somewhat distant to the mechanical geniuses lately. The both of them agreed without a second thought. None of them thought it’d turn out the way it did.

“Let’s play ‘who would you marry, who would you kiss, who would you kill!” Hunk called out. For some reason that was his favorite game. Even as the sweet guy he was, he loved the somewhat offensive game.

“I guess that’s as good a game as any,” Shiro shrugged. It had been quite a while since anyone on the team had played that with poor Hunk. Pidge just nodded, all but eager to do something, anything at all. She hated being bored with a fiery passion.

“Alright, I’m gonna ask first,” Pidge giggled, rubbing her hands together as she glanced back and forth at the two boys. “Hunk, out of Allura, me, Keith. Who would you marry, who would you kiss and who would you kill?”

And that’s how it started off. It was a lighthearted game, really quite harmless. But anyone who listened seemed to find a pattern arising. If Lance was ever in the equation, he was always chosen to be killed. And even, as time went on, they started slightly bagging on the Cuban flirt. 

They’d make fun of him for his stupid jokes, call him all sorts of things that are extremely hurtful. But obviously, he wasn’t around. What he can’t hear won’t hurt him right?

Out walked the seemingly oblivious boy, a smile on his face as he walked by. He said hello to everyone in the room, offering some help to Allura and Coran, who kindly refused. 

“Hey guys, what are you playing?” he asked, sitting next to Pidge on the couch. Pidge immediately leaned against him like always, taking in his warmth happily. Lance smiled down at her.

“Who would you marry, who would you kiss, who would you kill,” Hunk said with a bright smile. None of them seemed to even remember what they said about him just minutes before.

“Want to join?” Shiro asked affectionately. 

Had they really forgotten that they had called Lance annoying, stupid and ‘just a stand-in for the real blue paladin’? If they had, there was still one person who remembered. One person who struggled to keep the smile on his face, to keep the words of pain inside his head and not out into the cold air. One person who held back from running to his favorite room in the castle, where his favorite razor lay bloodied in the cabinet. One person who could cry and cry and never stop, the voices in his head never stopping the laughs and teases towards him, just like his own friends. The one person that nobody cared about, but that cared for everybody else. Lance McClain.

“No, I think I’m good this time around. Thanks though,” he grinned at Shiro, standing up. When he stood, Pidge fell back onto the sofa and whined at the loss of her favorite pillow. 

“Alright, next time though,” Hunk waved as Lance walked back and the game, as well as the mocking, continued; Lance still standing outside the door with tears in his eyes. 

He stood there for a long time, letting his mental body get thrashed repeatedly to match his physical one. But there was only so much of a beating he could take. With tears finally falling from his eyes, he walked slowly and calmly back to his room. 

“Lance, something wrong?” Keith asked when they crossed paths; Keith on his way to the main room. Lance quickly wiped at the tears before turning and smiling. As great an actor, he was, it looked pretty convincing aside from the tear tracks still on his face.

“Yeah, man. Do you need something?” Lance answered, voice totally smooth while his mind was a storm of extreme depression and need to just disintegrate into nothing.

“What’s wrong?” Keith quickly stormed over to his crush, grabbing at his beautiful face and wiping at some of the still wet tears. “What the hell are you crying for?”

“Oh, man, you got me. I guess I still feel a little homesick, no big deal,” Lance said quickly, chuckling a bit as he did. “I know I’m crazy awesome and everything but I do have my moments of being like this too.” 

Keith was slightly taken aback by that last sentence; it didn’t sound like Lance at all. Although the sentence seemed to make more sense with the offense pointed towards Keith, it sounded more like Lance was offended with himself.

Lance brushed shoulders with Keith as he continued his journey back to his room. And it was no surprise when he heard Keith sigh and start walking in the opposite direction. 

The neglect and jokes targeted at his heart became an expectancy for Lance and it didn’t hurt much anymore; what hurt was the fact that these were the people he cared for the most. He knew more about them than anyone and yet, they all seemed to hate him in all of his flirtatious glory. If anyone were to love him, it should’ve been them.

He stood in his room, staring at the razor he’d once again bloodied. The cuts were bigger and deeper this time, one for each comment he heard from his friends, one for each mistake he’d made during practice that day and one for each piece of food he’d consumed in the day. 

This was his punishment for being the person he was.

Ever since Lance was little, he had either been punished or punished himself for his mistakes. He didn’t know any other way to live.

His skin was already scarred from his childhood and he was slowly adding to it. And exactly as he expected, nobody noticed him constantly wearing long sleeves. He sometimes would forget to cover his wounds, blood staining some of his clothes. But nobody noticed. And if they did, they didn’t care.

Cleaning out the wounds was Lance’s least favorite part. And that was the part that he stretched out as long as he could. The more pain, the better. His eyes were glistening with fresh tears once again, and those tears fell quickly with the sting of the ointments that kept the fresh wounds from infection. He quickly bandaged up the large, deep cuts before hiding the razor again and pulling on a shirt and jacket.

When he came back to the main room, he heard the game still going. There were fewer jokes about Lance but every once in a while he’d hear them come up. He eventually went into the room where now Keith had joined the fun.

Keith saw the blue paladin and quickly averted his eyes, for no reason that Keith could think. It just felt weird to see Lance after seeing him with tears on his face. It wasn’t something he was used to. Nobody had seen him cry before, not even Hunk, and Keith was more than surprised when he did.

“Still playing that, huh?” Lance laughed at them and their childishness. But it wasn’t real, although nobody seemed to notice how fake it felt to Lance. Except Lance noticed Keith peek over at him for a moment, but quickly looking back when Lance saw.

“Yeah, it’s the best game after all,” Hunk grinned like a child on Christmas as they continued another round. Pidge seemed to be getting tired of it, which only made Lance chuckle.

“Shut up, you annoying shit!” Pidge growled at Lance who continued laughing although somehow more hollowed than it was when he started.

Lance sat on the sofa, next to the uncomfortable Keith. Although he sat as far as he could from Keith, Lance still felt like he was in the way. It hurt to think that he’d made his friend uncomfortable and he couldn’t just disappear. After a moment of feeling unwanted like always, Lance just sighed and put his face in the palms of his hands. He rubbed at his eyes, trying to hide the tiredness that was slowly beginning to show.

“I’d kill Lance,” a new round but still with the same outcome. Lance shrugged it off when Pidge apologized for choosing him instead of one of the other two. But he didn’t really shrug it off from his own mind as it along with everything else continuously swirled around his brain nonstop.

“I’d kill Lance.”

“I’d kill Lance.”

“I’d kill Lance.”

Lance rubbed at his forehead, his head pounding with the constant telling of the truth in his brain. When the rubbing didn’t work, he lightly hit his head with the palm of his hand, repeating the gesture multiple times before realizing it wasn’t working.

“Why can’t it just stop?” Lance asked out loud, too quiet for anyone to hear.

When he looked up, everyone was still doing their own thing. Pidge, Hunk, and Shiro were still playing their game. Allura and Coran were still working on the castle defenses. And Keith was very carefully avoiding eye contact with Lance and listening to the game as though it was an entertaining radio station. If anybody noticed Lance, they’d just think that he was being bored like he usually seemed to be. But nobody would notice Lance. 

Lance audibly groaned out, but nobody noticed it. Although a certain mullet man had turned around for a mere second. With no love, Lance decided he needed to throw up to try to get the awful knot out of his stomach. 

“Where are you going?” Keith asked quickly, forgetting that he was supposed to be shunning the Cuban. 

Lance shrugged before saying, in almost a whisper, “It’s not like anyone cares where I go or what I do.” Keith barely even heard the words as they were softly plucked from his mouth. “I’ll be in my room if you need anything. Just be sure to knock and wait for a response before walking in,” Lance said this, directing it to everyone but no one heard except Keith.

Keith could feel that there was something extremely wrong with Lance. He’d never noticed it before but it was definitely there. How long had it been there? And what exactly was wrong? When did Lance feel like such a stranger?

As Keith sat on the sofa, questioning how much he knew Lance, he drowned out the sounds of the game. He stared at where Lance had been sitting on the sofa, completely overwhelmed with the thoughts.

But then slowly, his thoughts started to get quieter and he listened to the three paladins playing their game. He listened intently to what they said. And as time went on, Keith heard a few things directed at the absent blue paladin that definitely hurt to hear, even to him. Had Lance heard some of this and took it to heart? Doesn’t he know that this is just a game? That nothing said here meant anything?

Keith decided to go to Lance’s room and talk with him. He felt as if he didn’t say something, something bad would happen. He didn’t know what it could be but that thought just lingered in his mind.

Keith knocked on Lance’s door several times before realizing that he might not even be in there. So instead Keith started looking around the castle, trying to find the missing Lance. The bathroom door was closed so he went over to it and knocked. The only thing that became of it was a lot of gasping and a sound of someone vomiting. 

“Lance, is that you?” Keith called in softly. He heard a soft “totally” come from the other side of the door and felt his heart plummet to his stomach. Lance’s voice sounded so broken and it sounded like he was crying again.

“I’ll be out in a sec,” Lance called to Keith before reaching his fingers back into his throat again so he could throw up one last time. He had been attempting to get the knot out of his stomach for that entire time and this was his last attempt for now. When he was done, he stood up dizzily, cleaned himself off and walked out. He walked right past Keith, expecting that Keith would go into the bathroom.

“What were you doing in there?” Keith asked as he followed Lance. When Lance didn’t reply, Keith growled at him. “What’s wrong with you? You’re acting like a little bitch.” Lance once again didn’t respond, just continuing his walk back to his room.

“Are you going to keep asking me questions I won’t answer? If you need something, come into my room and we can talk. But if it’s just so you can pester me about stuff like this, get the fuck away,” Lance’s voice was so stern and mean, but at the same time, sad and lonely.

Keith was taken aback and forgot how to walk. He stopped dead in his tracks, letting the Cuban slip right through his fingers. 

When Keith regained his ability to walk, he went to Lance’s room, lightly knocking on the door. He didn’t notice it at first but the sound was slowly accelerating into a scream of pure pain. Keith ran into the room, finding Lance sobbing on the floor, hugging his hand against his chest in a safety position.

“Lance?” Keith stared blankly at the boy. He wasn’t wearing a shirt; his shirtlessness revealing so much damage that it even brought Keith to tears. Scars on his back and shoulders, long and deep while scars on his arms were small but very obviously painful. A bloody razor sat on the floor next to Lance along with something that made Keith feel like vomiting. A pinkie and ring finger lay limp on the ground, far from being connected to a body.

Keith found himself cradling the boy in his arms, hugging him against his own chest, tears streaming down both of their faces.

“What the fuck did you do, you dumbass?” Keith sobbed, his forehead now against Lance’s. “They weren’t being serious, idiot. We all love you so much. It was just a game!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If there's ever a time when anyone reading wants me to write something Langst related that they've come up with, please put the prompt in the comments!


	3. Keep It Secret Until It's Too Late

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lance and Keith go on a mission and fall into a cave with no escape. The only thing to do is wait. But Keith didn't realize how dire the situation really was. Because Lance didn't want him to do anything rash in order to save the already dying Cuban.

Lance could barely feel anything. His vision was spotty and his head spun in an endless loop. His lower body was completely paralyzed and he knew that he had many broken bones and probably damaged internal organs. But he wasn’t the important one here.

Lance and Keith had been walking around a “deserted planet” when they fell down into a hidden cave, leaving them in an awful mess. Keith was on one side of the cave, leg stuck underneath a rock while Lance was on the other. He’d fallen straight onto his back, breaking it completely, while a few fairly big rocks had crumbled down on top of him.

Both of their armor had been completely destroyed during the fall and neither had much of a choice when it came to moving. Lance felt like his spirit was going to slip out of his body at any moment. But he couldn’t tell Keith that; that’d just freak him out and try hard to find a way out before it could happen. Of course, Lance didn’t want to die… but the only other option was for Keith to cut off his leg. And Keith was too important to the team to be permanently handicapped.

“Do you think they’ll find us?” Keith asked. He’d finally gotten out of the hysterics of pain and was now extra pessimistic. And what he said, really began to freak the already dying Cuban more.

“I-I think so,” Lance gasped, his mind fogging over for a moment. He really wasn’t doing so good. “Everything’ll be fine. Don’t worry.”

“How long have we been in here for?” Keith asked after a few minutes.

“Can’t tell you,” Lance answered, his eyes fluttering closed before shooting back open.

“You still alive, Lance?” Keith was trying to make light of the situation, similar to what Lance would usually do. It was scaring Keith that Lance was so quiet. Was he really that bad?

“Hangin’ in there… You?” Lance’s voice was starting to weaken. Keith could barely make out what he said now.

“I can say that I’ve been better for sure,” Keith groaned out as he once again attempted to get his leg free. It just ended with his vision blacking out for a moment. “Tell me, are you in a better situation than me?”

“Don’t know. I’ve never experienced a boulder crushing my leg before,” Lance knew that he was probably in a worse situation than him. Although, it probably hurt for Keith much more-Lance felt nothing anymore. 

“I guess you’re right. But what’s happened to you? Why can’t you get up?” Keith was really trying to pry. Lance had been hoping not to tell Keith that he was dying.

“Oh, you know, the norm,” Lance was beginning to feel a fire in his lungs. He was going to stop breathing really soon; it was hurting too much now. “Quiznack.”

“I don’t know what you mean by ‘the norm’. Could you explain?” Keith grumbled. He had to focus completely on his sense of hearing in order to hear the Cuban now.

“Keith, don’t freak out,” Lance’s voice was nearly a whisper now. “I don’t think… I’m gonna make it…”

“What? Lance, you’re going to be fine! You shouldn’t make jokes like that!” Keith growled. He tried to pull himself away even harder now.

“I told you not to freak out,” Lance sighed. The fire in his lungs burned with every inhale that tears began to spring in his bright blue eyes. “You just have to…” Lance grunted as he tried to move slightly. “Sit around and wait without me…”

“Lance shut the fuck up! You’re going to be fine!” Keith yelled, creating a ringing in Lance’s ears. He whimpered as he took another shallow breath that resulted in the flame billowing deep inside of his lungs.

“Sorry, man,” Lance whispered. Another inhale made him feel as though his entire body was engulfed in flames. “We were a really great team.” His last exhale sent a calming sensation through his entire body. The dim lighting of the planet’s suns through the cave opening dimmed until everything was black. He could hear the dull calls of Keith, but they were getting quieter by the second. The last thing that ran through his mind before everything was gone was the hope that Keith would wait for the team and not let his hotheadedness drive him to do exactly what Lance was expecting he'd do.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one was a little rushed. The other one I was planning to use wasn't completely finished and I didn't realize, so I hope you can forgive this chapter.
> 
> Leave comments, please! Ideas, constructive criticism, anything is appreciated!
> 
> I'm not great with Voltron "language", if you can call it that. So if I mess anything up, please leave a comment and I'll fix it right up!
> 
> Thank you for reading!


	4. There's Nothing To Torture

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lance gets captured by Haggar. Haggar is trying to turn him against his team by stripping his mind of its sanity, but what she doesn't realize is that most of Lance's sanity was long gone a long time ago. And Lance's sane part decides to allow himself to run rapid in the Galran ship, not aware that that was the day Voltron decides to come to save him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There is quite a bit of gore in this one. And Lance's past was not explained but maybe in a different chapter, I'll write about it if you'd like.

“You’re the most useless Paladin!” Haggar roared, shooting Lance with another surge of electricity. Lance’s body shook and he let out a strangled, shaky scream as the electricity consumed him. A shaky smile grew on his sweaty face and Haggar growled in anger. In the background, Lance could hear the sobs of his teammates through the screen.

“Why won’t you break?!” Haggar’s scream made Lance shake more than the after effects of the electric ball she’d thrown. He let out a weak chuckle, licking his lips and tasting the salty tears and sweat that covered them. “You are so useless! And stupid! And annoying! You’re just a placeholder for the true Paladin!” Another chuckle rang through the echoey room, black walls and only a dull purple illuminating from the lights on the wall.

Haggar threw another ball of electricity at him, this time burning more excruciating pain than any of the others. Lance’s eyes popped out of his head and the scream he emitted was unlike any scream he’d ever produced in his life. Sweat dripped and mixed with the anguished tears. His shirt was a mess of singed fabric at this point, showing off the many burns and bruises and cuts he’d gotten in the span of his time in this Hell.

He had no idea how long he’d been here or how long he’d have to endure it, but he knew that his Space Family was watching him be tortured… this time. Haggar decided that this was an even better form of torture- humiliation was such an awful form of torture. She’d been trying and failing to break him with her insults and pain and now humiliation. But Lance was unbreakable by this point in his life; the only thing that he ever wanted was death.

He gritted his chattering teeth, body aching from the pain it had to endure daily. Now that the shock had faded, Lance was once again shaking and sweating and crying. He heard some more sobs from his friends, but he couldn’t focus anywhere to see anyone's faces.

“Lance,” he could hear Shiro’s voice echoing across the room. “Lance, it’ll be okay. Just stay awake for me, buddy.”

Lance’s breath was shaky. He hated how everyone always degraded him. He knew that if there was one thing he could do, it was enduring torture. He did every day ever since he was born, after all. 

He let his eyes wander to wear the blurry colors of his teammates were on the screen. His vision was as shaky as the rest of him now, so he couldn’t focus on them.

“I’ve got this,” Lance’s voice was so shaky from the blast from before, making it sound like he was scared more than he was. “I know what I’m doing.”

Another harsh blast hit him and his scream ripped through his throat. His flesh tingled and he smelt the burning of it. No different from the day Haggar had someone use a branding iron on him- one on the ankle, one on the bottom of his foot, one on his right shoulder blade and one on his ass. Lance didn’t know what the mark that they branded on him was, but it sure hurt to get.

“Four phoebs and you’re still stubbornly holding onto sanity!” Haggar was getting really pissed by this point and Lance’s smirk was unmistakable as it grew on his face. Four months, he’d been stuck in this Galra ship. Four months, he’d not seen his fellow Paladins. Four months, they hadn’t been able to get him out. No surprise, he was replaceable. He never would’ve expected they save him if he got captured. Although, it was a relief to hear the voices of the people he’d spent so long with, even if they were people who hated him.

“I let go of most of my sanity long ago, bitch,” Lance laughed. He ignored the pure burning that accompanied every movement of his stomach. Haggar growled in frustration, another surge of electricity thrown in his direction and being absorbed by his body. The scream died in his abused throat and he just desperately gasped for breath.

But Haggar didn’t give him a chance as she threw another, Lance gritting his teeth. One more for good measure left Lance lapping up much-needed air like a dog rejected of water. Tears fogged his vision even more than the shock. A ringing was present in his ears, getting louder with every second.

He didn’t realize when Haggar had him hauled away when his team began screaming at him to wake up and yelling various profanities at Haggar for what she’d done. He didn’t notice when he’d been thrown back in the tall but narrow room that he’d been thrown in every day after his torture was over. 

When he’d gained consciousness again, his hands were still shaking slightly. Thank God he could control his tears now that most of the pain had been replaced with an achy numbness. He hated crying, it made him feel pathetic. Shiro wouldn’t be crying in this situation, neither would Keith. They were strong and… better than Lance was. Pidge and Hunk would definitely have cried a lot, so Lance was happy he was the one out of the three of them to get kidnapped.

Lance liked to believe that he was strong in some regard. After years and years of torture and pain and all hope gone, he was familiar with what was happening to him now. It had only been a few months, but compared to when he was little, it had felt like a few hours. He was numb to the torture that he was going through. He was numb to pretty much anything.

All of the offensive jokes from his friends, all of the rolls of their eyes when he made a joke or flirted, all of the annoyed groans when he made light of a heavy situation- they were all stuck behind the wall that held his painful past and his own self-hatred. They were all hidden behind his crooked smile and bright eyes. And all the scars are hidden behind his jacket and jeans, only uncovered now that his undersuit for his Paladin armor was destroyed.

Lance sat up slightly, head against one of the walls. He knew he wasn’t going to get off the Galra ship alive, and he wasn’t really in much of a state of mind to care at this point. But even with the death wish he had- oh so deep inside of his mind- he wasn’t allowing himself to go down without a good fight. 

Lance was more than theatrical after he’d lost the majority of his sanity when he was six. He knew how to hide all of the insanity and the need for theatrics, but he didn’t need to know. Killing without remorse, dodging like he had way back when maybe surviving an hour or two if he let his mind go wild long enough.

As if he’d do that. He had enough sanity left to know that- if the team cared enough- his team would try and save him. They know where he is. He’d wait for a few sleep cycles before going completely ballistic.

Sleep cycle after sleep cycle, Lance waited. He wouldn’t be surprised if they didn’t come, but it definitely would hurt worse than any of the burns or cuts that littered his body. Each day, a new form of torture. Some were harder to take than others. But none could crack the already cracked boy. 

Haggar had taken the wrong person, she realized. Haggar had thought that she could use Lance to her advantage. Lance seemed the weakest, bigheaded and stupid of all the Paladins. She expected him to be an easy target. She’d be able to turn him against his team without trouble. Easy to capture, and just a few hard blows of electricity and painfully offensive statements, he’d be broken and she’d rebuild him into a weapon.

How could someone who acted so stupid and weak and bigheaded be the exact opposite?! And seemingly indestructible?! She couldn’t understand! She didn’t know what to do! And she realized too late that she’d slipped up by giving away their position. Lance wasn’t cracking and Voltron would be on their way at any moment. How could she have made such an awful mistake?!

There was only one thing left to do… wipe Lance’s mind. Haggar was very hesitant because she knew that it’d take a lot of energy and it’d take a lot of work to change his memories completely. The time that she really didn’t have anymore. But it was her best option now.

Lance decided that he was going to let himself go for the first time since he’d escaped all those years ago. He’d pulled everything behind a wall after that day, but he knew he wouldn’t have to do that now. If he did, he couldn’t guarantee he’d be able to. 

A hard exhale sent a wave of pain all over his front but he stood up anyways. Even with all of his injuries, he should be able to kill a few people. His fighting was better than anybody knew. 

Nobody had bothered to make any security measures with him. They probably underestimated him or believed that the wounds he gained the first day would keep him from moving for the rest of his life. They’d fractured his leg in several places on the first day that he’d been captured. And sure, it hurt to walk, but like Hell, he’d stop walking and moving because of it. This wasn’t the worst thing he’d had to endure, even in the situation of murdering another person.

The door opened and Lance charged without seeing who it was. Inside of one of the untouched scraps of his clothes, he’d stowed a knife. He wasn’t a bad pickpocket, not bad at all. One of the guards was standing so close, the knife just begging to be snatched, and Lance was more than willing to oblige. 

In one foul swoop, Lance stabbed into the cloaked person’s head. He repeated the gesture over and over again, feeling satisfaction as blood started to spill down onto the floor. Some of the blood somehow landed on Lance’s face as well, bringing Lance absolute joy.

When he was done, he pulled the hood of the cloak away from the destroyed head, looking to see his first victim. Surprise, fear and joy all spilled into the sane part of his mind as he realized who the cloaked figure had been. But why would she have come to see him in his cell? She never did that.

Lance stayed on top of the dead woman for a few minutes, fear that she wasn’t dead yet. After all, Haggar loved to play tricks on people. But eventually, he jumped to his feet, ignoring the pain that radiated through his body.

Steadily, Lance walked out of the room. If Haggar was just messing with him, then damn that was a good trick! One that he really wanted to be a reality. He wanted the satisfaction of murdering that awful witch.

Without even a flinch, Lance cut the throats of the surprised guards that were always on either side of the door. His knife moved swiftly to each side, barely even looking. The bodies thudded on the floor, a satisfying sound to Lance’s ears. He grinned deviously as he limped away from the small room.

Red lights blared suddenly along with the emergency sirens, making Lance think that someone had seen the bodies. Lance just giggled. Life doesn’t matter. His eyes glistened as two unsuspecting guards ran towards him. One got close enough that Lance plunged his knife past the chestplate and into Galran flesh. Quickly pulling the knife out of the one, the other already trying to shoot him. Lance jumped up, doing a side flip in the air, landing not very gracefully in front of the other. He bit his lip at the harsh pain but didn’t take a second of rest before grabbing the Galra’s blaster, turning it around on him and pulling the trigger.

Blood splattered all around and Lance giggled again, a little more sanity slipping from his mind.

He had to retreat to the wall this time, his leg feeling like a waste of flesh now. Even more, sanity was lost, proven by his extreme stupidity. He didn’t even give it a second thought as the already bloodied knife carved into his leg. He didn’t even flinch as he worked and when he finished, he hopped as though this was normal to him. He left a blood trail behind, as if he gave a fuck.

Another few Galran soldiers later, he had three knives tucked into his tattered clothes and two blasters in both hands. He also found out that the reason the alarms were going off was that Voltron had finally come for him. And all he did was laugh and laugh that they’d decided to come the day he let go of everything. The laughs mixed with sobs as he killed more and more, finding it hard to stop. 

“L-Lance?” a familiar voice called from across the hall. He had one of his knives deep inside one of the Galran soldiers, smile burning on his face. He ran his knife all the way through the Galra, blood pouring on him like a shower. 

“Hey, Hunk, buddy,” Lance was giggling, but it slowly faded as he forced back everything. Hunk looked absolutely terrified and appalled. Lance let out another giggle, but covered his mouth. It wasn’t normal to find that face on your best friend to be so entertaining. He knew that… he knew it yet it was entertaining to him anyways.

Hunk ran over to Lance, as if Hunk hadn’t just watched a gruesome murder take place. Hunk’s strong arm wrapped around Lance, his chubby fingers gracing over Lance’s knotted, greasy hair. Now Hunk began to sob and sob, his clothes rubbing against Lance’s burned chest. Lance should’ve felt pain from the contact but instead… felt extreme depression. Lance let his body collapse in Hunk’s embrace, but Lance held back the waterfall of tears that were begging to be released.

“It’s okay, Lance,” Hunk whispered through tears. “We’ll help you through this. We’re all so proud that you didn’t abandon all hope and sanity.”

Lance’s giggle was mixed with a sob as he said, “But I did. I did, so long ago. I don’t have much sanity left… and hope is dead.”

Hunk sobbed harder, but didn’t say anything. And he did not let go for a good long time. The sane part of Lance felt such comfort and warmth from his friend… but the insane part hard the taunting desire to murder his best friend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> COMMENTS! I read all of them, so PLEASE send me comments! If you want an explanation for this Lance's past, please tell me in the comments below! If you don't, I will decide for myself, and I usually chose laziness overall... just saying. Please leave comments, they give me life!


	5. Not a Chapter!

Alright, so there are a few things that I need to explain.

 

First off, I can't do daily uploads! It's too stressful, and now that I've got work and school to deal with in a few days, it might ACTUALLY kill me! So instead, I think I'll upload a new chapter every Monday. I hope you can understand. I knew that daily uploads would end up being impossible, however, I just wanted to see what it was like for a few days. But it's extremely hard with everything that I have to do with my life, even without school! I'm sorry! And I'm AWFUL with schedules, so if I miss a Monday, I'm sorry and please forgive me!

 

Second, I've got to explain the title of this. I know it's called "Langst One-Shots", but one-shots are so hard for me to make! I don't know where to stop on them. So I think that, even though the name says one-shots, I might have stories with parts to them. And they might be a little mixed up because I'm an idiot, but everything will be in the summaries and notes. So don't ignore those, if you want to understand what's going on!

 

Thank you so much for reading, please be patient with me. Please give me ideas on things to write, because OH MY GOD, it's so fucking hard to get ideas!


	6. Can't Do Anything Right

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ever since a surfing accident when Lance was younger, Lance couldn't hear. It broke his heart as well as his father's... Lance was set out to be a star musician at one point. Now the team is going back to Earth, so how is Lance's Papa going to react, and what is Lance going to do? He hadn't told the team about his disability... he had to explain it to them himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm trying to get back in the swing of things in life, so I just decided to put out this story. It's not my best work, but I tried my best. Please enjoy!

I’ve always been a disappointment to everyone. I can’t do anything right. Papa used to tell me that all the time- “You are a disgrace to this family. Why can’t you do anything right?” I used to be someone my family was proud of. I got offers to music colleges left and right. My family used to praise me, but before I left, anyone could see the disappointment etched on their faces. The disappointment that I was no longer capable to join them in the field of music. The disappointment that I had to change my course to my second favorite thing, astronomy.

Now, I wondered… how do they feel now? They think I’m dead now, right? Do they feel bad for being so disappointed in me? Or do they not even care? They practically disowned me after the accident happened, so do they even give a shit about me? 

It’s sad… I’m even more ashamed than they were. I can’t even tell the people who I live with and fight the universe with. And now that we’re going back to Earth, I wished I’d told them. Because they were constantly getting angry with me now. I couldn’t focus on anything other than the disappointed faces of my family. Would they still be angry with me for ruining the perfect music loving family?

I could remember some days where I tried to play something on the piano. Maybe if I focused hard enough, I’d be able to play it decently without hearing it. No such luck.

“How dare you disgrace this family more by making us hear your trash!” Papa was furious. He yelled at me for hours and got even angrier when I looked away. It was harder when you HAD to look at them. It’s hard enough to get scolded by your father, but to have to look at his face the entire time… it was like some form of torture.

I didn’t know how I’d react to see those angry faces and disgusted eyes again. I just wanted more than anything to have stopped that damned accident that ruined my life! But it was stupid of me to feel bad for myself when everyone on the team had it worse.

Pidge had her anxiety, the fear that she’d fail a mission and someone would die. The fear that she might never see her father and brother again after this war’s over.

Hunk was too sweet for war, constantly woken from nightmares where he had to murder someone important to him.

Keith had lived his entire life alone. He was awkward in social situations and now he was the LEADER of Voltron. He’s got a lot on his plate.

Allura lost her mother and father 10000 years ago. Coran lost everything other than Allura 10000 years ago.

And Shiro, damn, Shiro had it the worst! I had stopped breathing twice in my life, ones for a few hours, the other for a few seconds. But Shiro… he’d been dead for months! And now he was in his clone's body with a missing arm! Fuck, Shiro must’ve been more than fucked up by now!

I had no reason to complain about my problems… or feel self-pity. I didn’t have it that bad. I could still hear when I was mentally connected with Red (or Blue, way back when) and I still had all of my family (hopefully).

We had set camp in one of the planets for the night, a campfire in the middle of a circle of giant space cats. Everyone was talking and having fun, and all I wanted was a chance to audibly hear their conversation. I couldn’t keep up with everyone, and my ears were starting to ring again.

I laid down on my side on the hard rock ground, closing my eyes. There was a strong hand shaking my shoulder and I jerked up. There was Shiro in front of me, concern etched on his scarred face. It was amazing to me how he was able to go on with life after all that he’s been through.

“Sorry,” I think I said. It was hard to talk when I couldn’t hear my own voice. But I’ve been doing that ever since the accident so it’s become somewhat of a habit.

“Are you okay?” Shiro’s lips moved, but I couldn’t hear his voice. All I could hear was ringing. I could barely remember what his voice sounded like, now that I haven’t heard it through the coms in a long time. I nodded softly, my brain feeling like mush inside my skull. It hurt, to say the least. “Maybe you should go get some sleep. You look tired.”

“If… if you want me to,” I shrugged. How loud was I right now? Was I yelling into his face or was I whispering inaudibly? I doubted that I was a perfect volume for the situation. His lips turned up and he nodded. I stood up, not looking back as I shamefully went to Red. It was one of those things that just filled me with shame for whatever reason. I didn’t even know why.

I loved being alone. If I told someone on the team that, they’d probably not believe me. After all, I’m always searching for attention. But, I don’t feel like I have to keep my eyes peeled all the time when I’m alone. I can close my eyes and just get enveloped in the endless silence without the worry that someone’s calling for me.

And inside of Red, if anything bad happens, she reaches through the mental bond and I get a chance to hear what’s going on.

When we got back to Earth, I never would’ve thought that it’d be such a terrible day. I found out the date and the ringing that had been present in my ears, to begin with, it amplified 10 fold. 

We got to Cuba, where my family still lived. Nobody wanted to move to America- they had their lives in Cuba. After all, they were all amazing musicians, almost too famous in Cuba. We were right on the beach, everyone playing in the familiar glistening ocean. I couldn’t even remember the sounds that the waves made when they crashed onto the shore. It nearly brought me to tears already. I was still filled with self-pity, even though I really shouldn’t.

I walked down the beach, breathing in the salty air as I let the sand roam in between my toes. What did everyone sound like playing on the beach? Were they as rowdy as my family was when they were happy? When I wasn’t a disgrace and shunned. The wind was blowing my hair to the side, blowing inside of my ringing ear. I could make out the faint “Whoosh!” in my ear.

I turned to see Coran and Allura skeptically walking out of the Black Lion. They seemed amazed by the magnificent body of water. He could see their mouths moving, but he couldn’t quite read what they were saying.

I closed my eyes as I continued walking blindly. I could remember the days when all of my family would go out to play in the ocean. The times my brothers, my nephew (just younger than my youngest brother) and I had contests to see who could surf the biggest wave. The days when Papa and Mama would come out with us, Papa playing the guitar while Mama sang. Veronica, my oldest sister, joining in with her drumsticks against a rock and Maria, just barely younger than Veronica, dancing around like the graceful bird she was. We’d all eventually go home and join in the music- Simon, my oldest brother singing with Mama, Joshua, my younger brother playing the cello, Danny, my little nephew dancing with his mother. And then there was me, playing the piano… or the bass, or the drums, or the violin, viola, cello, flute, oboe, etc. 

I remembered the night when my brothers, nephew and I all went out alone. We were getting our night surfing done… and it went badly. I fell off my board when the water was too shallow like an idiot, hit my head against the ground. I hit my head again and again and again, in the same two spots. My ears rang as blood spilled from them and I ended up on the shore what felt like forever later.

That stupid accident stripped me of my career and my family’s admiration. It took away my everything until I decided to go on as a pilot to go into space. And that’s how I got here.

I love the ocean, but I can’t help but fear it more.

I opened my eyes, seeing in the distance the large rock that hung above the ocean. There was a very small patch of land underneath that rock, just barely out of reach of the greedy waves. I could see a few people standing in that small patch. Fear stuck through my entire body. Today of all days, I come back! How will they feel? How will they react? Tears pricked at my eyes as I thought of the many different outcomes of this day.

I breathed deeply as I got within earshot of them. I pushed the corners of my mouth into a smile, trying to hide the fact that the ringing in my ears was deafening (literally) and I was scared out of my mind.

“Hey, McClains. Been awhile,” I knew I yelled that. I could tell from the feeling in my throat that I’d yelled. But that was good, at least I wasn’t too quiet. I waved as everyone turned towards me. “How’s life been without your disgrace of a brother?”

There was no answer that he could see. All eyes were on him and all mouths were dropped. Thank god everyone who was alive when he left was still alive! But Papa looked OLD now, damn!

“Jeez, if you weren’t my family, I’d think you’d have just fallen for me,” I laughed, still probably too loud. But I don’t know how to control volume. “I know I’m gorgeous but you don’t have to stare at me like that.”

Danny’s eyes welled with tears, and he ran over at top speed. He jumped on me, hugging me so hard that it hurt. He’d gotten so big! Last time I saw him, he was still a preteen. Now he had gotten super tall and probably had gone through the squeaky voice faze. But, even with how hard he hugged and how big he’d gotten, I held onto his with everything I had.

He pulled away from me and looked at me.

“Can you hear me?” he asked and I smiled sadly

“No, Nino,” I shook my head. My eyes were started to fill with tears too.

“Where have you been? They said you were dead!” I was lucky to have seen that Veronica had stomped over. She had long hair now, not short like it used to be. It looked good on her. She looked like she was gonna flip a lid. “Do you realize how heartbroken we all were?! And you come here calling yourself a disgrace to the family!”

I laughed. “You're as temperamental as ever,” was all I said. I stopped watching as she continued to yell at me. 

Everyone came over and gave me hugs, except for Papa, who stared at the sand. He refused to even look at me. 

I told the story, leaving out anything about not telling anyone about my handicap or any of the really bad scolding that I got. They were all pretty interested… except for Papa, who still stared at the sand.

“Alright, we should get home before it gets late,” Papa announced. Everyone looked at me.

“I want to meet your team. Bring them home with us,” Danny said, his face filled with excitement. I tried to imagine what his voice sounded like… was it still high pitched or was it deep like his papa’s now?

I turned my attention to Papa, a question in my facial expression. He looked at me for a moment before sighing and nodding softly.

“But don’t forget,” Papa said a stone cold expression. “You aren’t apart of this family anymore. So don’t get comfortable here, understand?” my smile grew heavy but I held it up with everything I had. Everyone else looked at him as if he’d just blown up a children’s hospital.

There was a lot of mouths moving, but I couldn’t keep up so I yelled over them (hopefully). “I understand!” Everyone stopped. I was loud enough. “I’ll be over when I can with the others. And we’ll leave as soon as we’re done visiting so don’t worry about it.”

There was a long pause before I decided I should add one more thing.

“I’m sorry that I came back today. There was no way of any of us knowing it was the day Mama died. We can’t really keep track of dates up in space,” I chuckled. Talking felt so hollow. 

I stood up and walked back to where we had parked the Lions. Getting back, I saw everyone still messing around in the ocean. Allura and Coran had finally joined the fun, leaving only Krolia and Romelle sitting several feet apart on the sand. Romelle still had trouble with the fact that some Galra weren’t fighting against Voltron.

“Hey, everyone!” I called apparently loud enough for even the people who were pretty far in the ocean to hear. “Can you all come here?!”

There was no questions asked as Allura, Coran, Pidge, Hunk, Keith, and Shiro came back to the shore, soaking from head to toe. I had to keep from laughing. Keith reminded me of an angry wet cat. I imagined that Keith had been thrown in by Shiro earlier and Keith was just trying to get revenge.

“Alright, we’ve all been invited into my family’s home,” I informed with a smile, trying to forget the last thing I’d read from my Papa. “My siblings and nephew really wanted to meet you all.”

“You met them without us?!” Hunk asked, exaggerated horror on his face. I laughed.

“Yeah, they were over there,” I pointed to the way I came. “I was just walking around and saw them.” Even though that wasn’t quite true.

They all seemed pretty excited to know that they were going to meet my family. I started laughing at their joy. But it quickly stopped as I remember what I was planning to tell them. It was better for them to hear it from me then one of my siblings.

“Hey, I’ve got something I need to tell you all,” I sighed and everyone’s excitement seemed to deflate. “Don’t think any differently of me after this ok? Let’s sit down.”

I told them everything. Everything from my musical career to my accident to the car accident my mom was in on my birthday. Everything came out in the open. The three or four hours that my heart had stopped beating completely when I’d come up on the shore. The fact that my ears were always ringing. I didn’t want them to pity me but I knew that if I didn’t tell them, Danny or Veronica or Maria or Simon would. 

Everyone’s jaw dropped as I went on and on, eyes dry and hiding all emotion. It didn’t feel real for me to tell them since I couldn’t hear it. And it didn’t feel real until I saw Keith’s eyes prick with tears and he glared at me before running off, Krolia joining him. She was going to comfort him.

The realization hit me like a moving train. I froze, tears forming in my eyes as I thought about it. This wasn’t the kind of story that I should tell such important people. The ringing in my ears came in full blast, sending a wave of pain throughout my entire body.

The pain made my eyes start to see only white, a painful color to have to see. I think I bit back a scream, but I couldn’t tell. Then the white faded into black.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tell me in the comments what you thought! What could I have done better and what should I do in the future? Tell me if you want to read more Deaf Lance fics or any handicapped Lance fics in the future! Thanks for reading!


	7. Gone Too Far

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lance and Keith have an argument and it goes way over the edge. Lance apologizes repeatedly, hoping for an apology in return... but Keith's stubborn. Not until Keith finds Lance in his room later does he realize the importance of that apology he was supposed to give.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things have been insane this week! This is just a little something so that I can get a little more time for some of the fanfiction suggestions. It's short and not the best thing I've ever written, but I didn't hate it enough to scrap it. I hope it's to everyone's taste!

It was going too far! Lance didn’t realize that Keith was extra sensitive today, now he regretted saying anything to him at all. Of course, as soon as he’d gone a little off the edge, Lance backed off. Being part of a big family, Lance had learned when one needs to back off. He was kind of like a dog in that respect- you fight until the other yelps in pain, then you back off and let them catch a breath. Keith, however, didn’t have that instinct.

“Want to go cry to your mommy and daddy?!” that was what made Lance realize how bad this was getting. His fighting eyes softened and he put his hands up in a surrender. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said that.”

Keith’s eyes flickered with a mixture of rage and pain. Shit, this really wasn’t gonna be good!

“Maybe you should go cry to your mommy and daddy instead,” Keith growled. For a moment Lance was confused, but that soon changed. “Because we don’t need a stupid, useless paladin on this team! You should just go home or die or whatever the fuck you want!”

Lance’s eyes widened in surprise. Yeah, no, Lance was not gonna retaliate. He’d been shot where it hurt, he had nothing to say.

“Anyone with half a brain would be better than you! And trust me, it’s not just me who thinks that!” Keith swung his fist into Lance’s cheek. Lance didn’t dodge, even though it would’ve been an easy dodge. He didn’t stop the harsh fall to the ground either. He could barely breathe anymore.

“Go die, dumb motherfucker!” Keith roared before storming away. As soon as he was gone, Lance’s eyes dripped with tears. He hyperventilated, biting at his knuckle to calm himself.

“He was just offended,” Lance whispered to himself. “It’ll be okay. He’ll apologize. He was just overheated.” Lance held his breath, tears streaming down his cheeks. “No, no, no, no, no. Stop thinking about it. Stop. They DO need me. They need me. They need me, don’t they? They don’t need me…”

“Lance, my boy, what are you doing down on the floor?” Coran asked, walking through the door to the training deck. Lance sniffled and wiped at his eyes with his sleeves. He was going to be okay, it’d be fine. Keith would apologize later and say that he was wrong… everything would go back to normal.

Lance stood up, nausea consuming his entire being. He held back the need to vomit, but he was extremely dizzy. He couldn’t even hear what Coran said, as he walked dizzily out of the room.

A few hours past before Lance was back to normal again. He kept thinking back to those words, but he kept holding on to the hope that Keith would apologize for what he’d said… but that didn’t happen.

Every time Lance saw Keith, Keith avoided him or glared angrily. Not one word of apology from Keith at all, even when Lance took the initiative and apologized AGAIN for what he said.

“Hey, Keith. I think we went a little too far in the training deck earlier… I just needed to tell you that I’m really sorry. I wasn’t really thinking about what I said until I’d said it. I messed up really bad,” Lance sighed and Keith’s glare had grown tenfold as he spoke.

“You’re never thinking,” Keith muttered. “You are always messing up. There’s no amount of apologizing that can make up for a lifetime of mistakes.”

Lance nodded softly, tightly clenching his fists.

“Okay. I understand. If I leave you alone forever, will you forgive me?” Lance asked, in almost a whisper. Keith was taken aback by the seriousness in Lance’s voice. But he nodded in spite of the nagging feeling that told him to forgive and apologize as well. Lance looked at him, an understanding, as well as sorrow, showing in the small smile on his face. “Got it. Bye.”

Keith thought he should go after Lance, but his stubbornness got the better of him. Before Lance left completely, he turned towards Keith, back already to him, tears starting to fall down Lance’s cheeks.

“By the way, I love you, Keith,” Keith stopped in his tracks. He looked to Lance, completely shocked. “Your angry, emo, and have the stupidest mullet, but I’m so gay for you. Thought you might want to know that before I leave.”

Lance left before Keith could say anything else. And Keith just shrugged it off as a cruel joke like everything else Lance said. 

He never expected to find Lance’s body laying on the floor of his room with a note to Keith.

“Dear Keith,

 

I’m really sorry for everything. You told me that the only way to make up for my mistakes was to leave you forever… so here you go. I’ve left you forever. What’s done is done, and all of my thoughts finally consumed me. Thank you for finally pushing me off the edge, so maybe I’ll finally be free from all of my thoughts. I doubt you’ll be super sad, but I just want you to know that it’s not all your fault. Think about it like this: we’re all born a few yards away from a cliff. People can either pull you away farther from the edge or push you closer. My entire life, I’ve been pushed closer by all sorts of people. By the time we got in that argument… I was dangling off the edge by one hand. At first, I wondered if you’d be the one to grab my hand and pull me back up. But instead, you stepped on my hand, sending me plummeting into the darkness below. But that's okay, because not only was that what I wanted but also what I think I deserved. So thank you. I loved you way more than I'd ever loved anyone. I hope you can forgive me now that I've left. Goodbye.

 

Lots of love,

Lance McClain, former Paladin of the Blue Lion of Voltron, the most useless and replaceable of all the Paladins.”

Keith, tears forming in his usually dry eyes finally realized… he’d gone way too far.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm hoping to get one of the suggested one-shots out by next week. Please forgive me for taking so long, I promise that I'll get them out!
> 
> Leave me comments! I read EVERY SINGLE COMMENT, which there aren't very many. But I'll still read them all if you all send them... please, I need comments! I feed off of the comments! Suggestions, constructed criticisms, even full-on hate mail is appreciated! (Although I'd really prefer for everyone who reads my stuff to like it but everyone has their opinions, right?)
> 
> Give me more suggestions. They take longer for whatever reason, but I do write them. The three that I've already gotten (one being for a second part to a story) is still in the works, but will hopefully be out soon enough. And the more the merrier, so please don't hesitate! I promise all of them will eventually be written and put on, so please give me those ideas!


	8. In The Dream

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Suggestion: TechnoGhost  
> "Here's a suggestion when the paladins are all asleep they enter a dream like realm and they see lance moving farther and farther away"
> 
> Summary:  
> It's the first time in a long time Keith has had a dream. It was weird- he knew he was in a dream and it wasn't an unpleasant dream either. In fact, the view was the most beautiful thing Keith had ever seen. However, the fact that he could see Lance walking away from them, and the fact that the others were there doing the exact same thing made him wake up in a cold sweat and filled with fear. Why did everyone on the team have the same dream and why was Lance turning everyone to extreme fear and uneasiness?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is my first time writing a one-shot based on a suggestion, so if it's not good I apologize. If anyone really doesn't like it, please tell me in the comments and I'll think about rewriting it. Especially if TechnoGhost (the one who suggested it) doesn't like what I tried to do, please put it in the comments and maybe some idea of what I should've done differently and I shall try to make it to your liking!

Keith was surprised when the first dream he’d had in years formed. He could tell immediately it wasn’t reality- just by looking at the scenery. The flawless black flowers atop a light green, rippling like a white ocean in the wind. The sky was dancing with yellows and pinks, melting in with the beautiful blue ocean in the distance. A large orange sun, with a burning red one far behind it, sat just above the horizon. It was a flawless sight… too beautiful to be real. Another hint being the fact that every Voltron member’s color was present in the gorgeous image.

It was a mystery why Keith looked to his left when he could just baffle at the amazing beauty. To his left were Shiro, Allura, and Coran standing in a line, wearing a similar dumbfounded expression. Unlike the scene in front of Keith, he had a hard time telling himself that these people were actually just in his head. Then he looked to his right where Pidge and Hunk stood with the same expression, same stance, same everything.

One by one, each person looked around themselves, finding that others were around. But nobody moved or spoke to each other, question etched onto their features. They looked just as confused as Keith felt.

Finally, the strange silence was broken. 

“What are you guys doing here?” Shiro questioned skeptically, gaining confused glances from everyone. Keith had been wondering the same thing, and he could see that the others thought the same.

“What are you talking about? This is my dream,” Pidge said not much anger and more genuine confusion. Keith’s eyes widened in surprise at said words. What was going on?

“No, it’s mine,” Hunk argued. “You’re all just figments of my imagination.”

“Bullshit!” Pidge growled, anger more prominent now. 

“Pidge…” Shiro said as a warning. Allura and Coran had just sat as confused and quiet as Keith. But it was a little more difficult for Keith since he was right in the MIDDLE of the fight!

Something caught Keith’s eye that turned the argument into white noise. Everything seemed to fade as he stared at the person in the distance. A long, skinny boy wearing Paladin armor, but Keith couldn’t make out the color. Although it was obvious who it was… nobody else in the team had such a lengthy figure.

“Lance?” Keith let out a whispered gasp. He was walking away from them, towards the blue of the ocean. For some reason, that action sent a wave of uneasiness. It was an action that made sense- Lance always loved the ocean. But this really scared Keith for some reason.

He could sense the others turn to stare as well, but he couldn’t rip his eyes away. Lance got so far that he was barely noticeable in the distance. In a split second, Keith’s vision was right in front of Lance, seeing Lance turn with a soft smile and tears running down his face. Then when he was able to see the sight from before, Lance was gone, along with the blue ocean.

Keith jolted up from his bed, cold sweat slipping down his temples. His heart was racing, eyes were blown wide in an unknown fear. What the fuck, Keith was freaking out over a dream? And not even a nightmare… just a simple dream with a beautiful view.

He stood up and went to get a glass of water. The amount of sweat he’d created made him slightly dehydrated.

“Keith?” Shiro asked as Keith walked into the kitchen. Keith wasn’t expecting to find everyone excluding Lance standing in the kitchen, fear radiating from them. “You had that dream too, didn’t you?”

“What?” Keith was more than confused. Were they telling him that his dream was shared between all of them? “Did you guys see that field with flowers and an ocean too?” Faces visibly paled at the question.

“What does it mean?” Allura inquired, hand holding her chin in deep thought. “We were all there, watching Lance walk away… I’m assuming that we all woke up in a panic since we all made it to the same place.”

“Could this be some sort of group hallucination kind of thing?” Hunk asked, a visible fear growing inside of him.

“What would cause all of us to have hallucinations?” Pidge asked. “I’m not even gonna ask how it is even possible that we all were in the dream conversing with each other.”

“There has to be a reason… something that we were supposed to understand from this,” Coran grunted, rubbing at his tired eyes. Poor Coran hadn’t gotten a chance to sleep in nearly a week and was probably finally getting the shut-eye he desperately needed.

“I… don’t know,” Pidge shrugged, gaining multiple shrugs in return. Keith added his own shrug into the mix as well. Really, to be honest, he was just tired and wanted some well-deserved sleep. 

“Did you guys see Lance crying too?” Keith finally decided to ask. Everyone’s faces fell sadly, nods greeting his question. “That was new… anyone really seen him cry before?”

“During sad movies and stuff sometimes, but his crying was kind of mixed with laughter, so I don’t know if you’d count that,” Hunk answered with uncertainty. Keith felt a sharp pain in his chest… Hunk knew Lance better than anyone else on the team.

Keith started for the door, forgetting what he’d come to get.

“Keith, where are you going?” Shiro asked with concern. Keith looked back for a moment, sending a slightly angry look towards his “brother”.

“I’m going to check up on Lance,” Keith answered, an edge to his words that would cut through someone just as easily as one of his knives.

Keith walked through the dimly lit hallways and made it to the door next to his own bedroom door. He knew that door well- the one where Lance would constantly walk out of wearing a long robe, a face mask and a towel covering his hair. To say the thought of Lance doing that didn’t make Keith chuckle would be a full lie. Two small knocks, a few seconds of silence, another two knocks- the pattern went on for a few minutes before Keith decided to walk in without the permission he sought.

Lance’s door slid open and Keith was surprised by the interior of Lance’s room. It was practically bare, only personalized in a few different ways. Five small knitted lions, the same colors of the Voltron lions, sat at the head of the bed, which was without sheets or pillows. On the nightstand was two picture frames- Lance’s big family (which was for some reason missing the Cuban himself) and small pictures of Hunk, Pidge, Keith and Shiro all scattered inside the second frame.

There was a small dresser with a few skin care products on top, most empty bottles by this point. The closet was alarmingly empty along with the laundry bin. The bathroom was smaller than Keith’s and completely spotless. Only the small bottle of shampoo and a bar of soap in the small shower showed that anyone used the bathroom at all.

The emptiness of the room sent fear throughout Keith. Which didn’t make much sense, since he himself had barely any personality inside his own room… but his room still had a few stains here and there from random spills. Lance’s literally was spotless. Besides, Lance was Lance and Keith was Keith- they were insanely different. Lance’s room should’ve been cluttered like Pidge’s, maybe more so. But it wasn’t!

That’s when Keith remembered what he was supposed to be doing. Lance wasn’t in his room, so where was he? Keith ran towards the Lion’s hangars, going straight to Blue without hesitation. However, the Lion was asleep, just like all the other Lion’s in the hangar. Keith gave himself a mental beating- Lance would never bother Blue this late at night.

So he resulted in searching the entire castle. Lance was definitely in the castle- Keith had checked the escape pods first to make sure Lance didn’t run away in the middle of the night. All escape pods were there, safely closed and attached to the castle. 

The main room was empty and so was the dining area. He searched a few unoccupied rooms, the infirmary, everywhere he thought of. Well, everywhere except the place where Keith would constantly go when he couldn’t sleep. When he remembered the training deck, he facepalmed so hard it hurt.

Walking into the vast room, the lights were on and gun sounds echoed throughout it. Goddamn, Keith should’ve found Lance hours ago if he was just smart!

Keith stared at Lance as he trained. Lance dodged a bullet that a Gladiator sent at him easily, twirling quickly to the side. The Gladiator got too close for Lance- Lance was only good with long distance shots. Keith expected him to fall backward and call off the bot, but what he got wasn’t at all like that. Lance’s elbow slammed into the Gladiator's neck, sending it into a momentary daze. That moment was enough for Lance as his gun changed form, becoming a glowing blue sword- longer than Keith’s by several inches. Lance stabbed straight through the Gladiator's chest and guided the sword out its shoulder. Blue flames erupted from the impaled cut, also singeing Lance’s front in the process. Then there was a soft explosion, sending Lance backward, right in front of Keith.

Lance rolled over, coughing up a storm. Keith could see a bit of blood dripping down to the floor, which Lance quickly wiped away. When the coughing stopped, Keith could hear the sniffling and quiet sobs of the blue boy. Keith knelt down next to Lance, rubbing circles into his back soothingly.

“Lance, what are you doing? You should be getting some sleep,” Keith asked softly. He could’ve acknowledged the sword, but he didn’t think now was the time. It was definitely strange to see something like that in the hands of the team’s sharpshooter (as he calls himself, but nobody else calls him).

Lance pushed himself off the ground, his eyes hidden by his hair. Keith hadn’t noticed before now… Lance’s hair was changing color. The healthy brown hair was becoming white (like Shiro’s tuft) all over. It was getting thinner, and the tips in the front were charred from the explosion.

“I’m fine, thanks,” Lance’s voice was deep and monotone as he turned around. The same voice called out for a new Gladiator, this one a few levels higher than the maximum Keith could fight. 

Lance’s bayard formed his signature gun, taking the first shot of the fight. The Gladiator dodged easily and got to Lance in seconds. Lance jumped above the Gladiator, doing an amazing backflip as it swung at him. Only one small swing made its way against Lance’s armor, which didn’t go through to hurt him in the slightest. Midair, Lance’s gun transformed into the sword again… but this one was different. This one- although the same glowing blue- had a different size and form. It was a bit closer to Keith’s sword size and there were holes in the middle that gave the user a little more speed in their swing. Lance used said speed to his advantage.

Even with the obvious pain from the blast he’d taken earlier, Lance ran around the Gladiator before it could get a good hit. But Lance had gone too far away for the sword to even get a small knick into the Gladiators back when he stopped running… or so Keith thought. Lance swung the sword above his head in a circular motion before slamming it down, a bright blue light slicing through the air at light speed and cutting the Gladiator's arm clean off. If it hadn’t moved out of the way at the last second, Lance would’ve most definitely split it in half.

The bayard switched forms a second time, this time in the form of a bag. Lance reached into the bag, pulling out a glowing ball. Lance threw one in the Gladiator's direction, changing his bayard to a gun and slamming his finger on the trigger. It hit the ball with deadly accuracy. And Jesus Christ, if Keith thought the last explosion would’ve hurt, that ball would kill you in seconds.

Once again, Lance got thrown backward, this time in the opposite direction of Keith. At least Lance wasn’t close enough to feel the full brunt of the pain. But Keith could feel the rumbling under his feet and the ear-piercing bang, so there was no way Lance could have come out of that unscathed.

Smoke floated off of Lance’s body. He didn’t move an inch but the heaving coughs could be heard from across the room.

“Lance, come on buddy, you look like you’re gonna die if you keep this up,” Keith said when he got close enough to the Cuban. Lance didn’t move, Keith could see that he was shaking and tears were running down his dark cheeks. A very small shake of the head made Keith fume with anger. He grabbed Lance’s arm, which was an insanely high temperature, probably from the explosions. “We need to get you to the infirmary. You shouldn’t explode yourself during late-night sessions.”

Lance jerked his head side to side in defiance and pulled his arm away- Keith growled angrily. Keith knew he had some bad anger issues and a lack of patience and it got even worse when it came down to Lance. For some reason, Lance had a way to get under Keith’s skin with everything. Even things like this, when Keith really shouldn’t be angry and Lance is literally doing nothing that should make him angry in the first place.

“I… can’t… stop… training… yet,” Lance’s voice was almost a whisper as he spoke, breathing deeply with every word. There was no way he’d be able to make another round with the condition he was in. And that just made Keith even angrier because Lance was practically killing himself. “I’ve… got… to… do… better.”

“Come on, idiot,” Keith growled as he picked Lance up. Keith immediately regretted his decision as he realized what he was doing. A blush crept up Keith’s neck as he stared at the double lidded blue eyes. It was a miracle that Lance had immediately fallen asleep in Keith’s arms before he could see the awful blush. 

Keith got him to the healing pods in record time, using his “amazing tech skills” to push the single button on the cursor that he memorized, changed Lance into the healing pod outfit and setting him inside.

As he sat on the stairs next to Lance’s pod, Keith’s mind wandered. Was Lance asleep during that dream, did he have the same dream? Was his dream different from the others, or was he walking away from everyone? Why was Lance walking away, and why did he all of a sudden disappear? And why was everyone so scared by it? It was kind of ominous. 

Keith stared at the tear covered the face of the Cuban’s. Even in the healing pod, you could see small burn marks on his usually clear skin. With every second in the pod, Lance’s hair got whiter and whiter… or maybe that was just Keith’s imagination. If Lance’s hair turned perfectly white, what did that mean? Was Lance just stressed? What was Lance so stressed about that his hair changed so drastically like that? Nobody else’s hair was changing like that, other than Shiro who went through trauma and had good excuses.

“Keith? What are you doing here, my boy?” Coran walked in, a small slouch bending at his usually confident stance. Bags were formed under Coran’s eyes, showing his exhaustion. “What happened to Lance?!” Coran’s eyes widened in alarm.

“Calm down,” Keith said softly and soothingly. Coran was too exhausted to stress about Lance right now. “Lance just messed up during a late-night training session. He’ll be fine after a varga or two.”

Coran’s relieved sigh curved Keith’s lips up. “That dream is keeping the others up. Do you have an idea of what that was?” Keith shrugged while shaking his head.

But then that stopped, and Keith’s eyes widened. Now that he thought about it, how long has it been since Keith had talked with Lance? Wait, when was the last time Keith even saw Lance outside of training? When was the last time Lance cracked a joke or flirted with Allura or just genuinely smiled? Keith couldn’t remember.

All Keith remembered was the hours of training where Lance would always get yelled at by Allura or Shiro. And those times were times when Lance was taking the blame for something that the others did. Lance always did exactly what he was meant to during training and missions, only disobeying orders when someone else messed up and they all had to help fix it. Keith knew that Lance was the best at obeying orders and doing everything that was needed- even going above and beyond a good sum of the times. But Lance also was the one who took the fall for any mistakes.

During a mission, Pidge had gotten sidetracked searching for her brother that she forgot what she was actually supposed to do. Lance had to go find Pidge and took a bullet for her- shooting right through his right leg. And even after that, Lance had to fight Pidge to get out and also run back to Blue before the ship went up in flames. When Lance got out of the healing pod, Allura started scolding Pidge. But Lance had blamed himself, saying that he left his post without permission and that Pidge would’ve been fine without him. So Allura scolded him instead, even as Pidge tried to disagree that it was all her fault.

Wait, was Lance trying to drift away from the team? Was Lance scared? What was going on?

“Coran, how long has it been since Lance came in to eat with the rest of us?” Keith looked at Coran with concern etched on his features. Coran tried to think back. When he couldn’t place a time, his face dulled with an understanding. “When was the last time Lance made a joke or flirted with Allura?” Another fearfully understanding look. The more Keith and Coran thought about it, the more afraid they became. “What about getting through training or a mission without him getting scolded or yelled at for something that wasn’t actually his fault?” Tears started to form in Coran’s eyes.

“Are you saying that what we saw was figuratively him distancing himself from us?” Coran asked. Keith shrugged.

“I don’t know,” Keith answered honestly. “But Lance is definitely not as happy and bubbly and social as he was before…” 

“What are we supposed to do…?” Coran asked in uncertainty and once again, Keith shrugged. He really didn’t know what to do to fix Lance. He still couldn’t understand why Lance was losing the color in his hair and most importantly how Lance was able to change his bayards form into so many different things with such ease.

“I don’t know but if we keep acting the way we do towards him, he might just fade away…” Keith’s voice was steadily growing quieter. “Like he did in the dream.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one could leave a lot of questions so if anyone wants a second part, leave a comment saying so and I'll try my best.
> 
> If anyone has any constructive criticism, things they liked or disliked or just anything that they thought while reading, please write in the comments. If you liked anything please put it down so I can know what to use in future chapters. Anything you didn't like, please do the same. I love getting comments, so please send me them!
> 
> Yes, I know, very creative name. I couldn't think of anything else, and I'm shit at coming up with names in the first place. If someone would like to come up with a name for this, put it in the comments and I'll change it. Most any name would be better than the one I came up with so don't hesitate.
> 
> Any other suggestions that you might have, please put them in the comments. I promise that I will always get the suggestions posted at one time or another, you just have to be patient!
> 
> Thank you for reading and enjoying my work! I love you all <3


	9. Things Always Have to Change

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lance is an ancient alien, thousands of years old. He was apart of the past team of Voltron, the Blue Paladin. Now he is once again- after 10000 years- joining forces with a new team to take down his previous Voltron leader. Although the new team doesn't seem to trust him or want him to be apart of them because of his mischievous nature... but what can he do about a part of himself that his people had forced upon him just like they did everyone else in his planet?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Most of the dialogue in this chapter is directly from the first episode of Voltron, so it is not my work. Of course, there are the differences that Lance isn't in most of the conversations and all of that, but I used the first episode to try and keep with the overall storyline in terms of the dialogue.
> 
> While I'm still working on the suggested stories, I decided to make some intermission chapters which will consist of this mini-series. I will be updating with the suggestions soon, but I'm just trying to make sure that they are good enough.
> 
> If you don't like it and wish for me to change the intermission chapters to something better please feel free to write it down in the comments.

Lance giggled softly. He’d never met such intriguing creatures before, and he felt his curiosity become peaked. He moved stealthily into the room and sat cross-legged just above one of the seats in the dark corner. No point in calling attention to himself for now- he’d watch their actions and allow the Alteans do the work to find him. Or he could just show himself after they’re awoken. They’d get released, he knew for certain- these strange alien’s were obviously had more natural curiosity than his species, and they didn’t seem to have any knowledge of what they were walking into.

The small, long-haired guy with a constant scowl stumbled upon the Altean woman- Lance knew well as the lost Princess Allura. She fell out of the cryopods, screaming “father” right into the boy’s arms. He looked extremely confused and also a little flustered- so this species wasn’t one for physical contact. Lance immediately withdrew the analysis as the big dark-skinned guy practically squished the small girl with glasses under his stronghold. Strange… strange indeed.

Princess Allura looked straight into the long-haired boy before her eyes hardened into a curious yet angry scowl. Grabbing onto the guy’s strangely rounded ear, she turned him around, leaving him in a very painful looking hold. It didn’t seem to hurt him as much as it would’ve hurt one of Lance’s species, the Notarai, or one of the Alteans. Both species had extremely sensitive ears, one small pinch sending a wave of hurt that would last for days. That was one of the first things their children had to learn how to deal with, even though it was a very painful phenomenon.

“Who are you? Where’s King Alfor? What are you doing in my castle?” she sent a round of questions that made Lance chuckle softly to himself.

“A Green Lion brought us here! That’s all we know!” the boy whimpered. That peaked Allura’s interest in seconds.

“How do you know about the Green Lion?”

Allura opened up the other cryopod, the advisor of King Alfor all those years ago, with his orange hair and gigantic mustache fell out but turned his fall into a roll.

“Enemy combatants!” Coran screamed. He stretched slightly and groaned in pain. Cryopods probably didn’t feel all that great after 10000 years… although it probably felt better than watching as millions of planets and peoples died. But who was Lance to complain? “Quiznak! You're lucky I have a case of the old "sleep chamber knees." Otherwise, I'd grab your head like this, wrap you up like so - and one, two, three -” Coran does a series of silly motions, making Lance shake his head… he missed Coran. Coran snapped a finger after his countdown. “Sleepy time!”

The big guy with the yellow headband looked terrified while the short girl played along with the little charade. She pretends to attack him, explaining what she would’ve done if he attempted such an attack. It reminded Lance of his past games with Coran when they were younger- what great fun that had been.

Allura gasped, cutting off the little game between the small girl and Coran. “We’ve been asleep for 10000 years?!”

Coran’s playful attitude went sour really quickly. Lance whispered softly, “I could’ve told you that much,” quiet enough to still be hidden away. One or two notches louder and he would’ve blown his “cover”. Coran heard and looked around in confusion, but didn’t find Lance… obviously. Lance smiled to himself- he loved that about himself- the ability to be hidden as long as you keep your voice lower than a specific volume and are in a more dark and secluded area. Coran smirked, fully aware that Lance was in the room. Lance smirked in response, although it wasn’t visible to anyone.

“Zarkon,” Allura’s voice was filled with an edge of anger. Lance rolled his eyes. Allura was always too hot-headed for a job like this, yet here she was, being dragged into it. It was a good thing Coran was still around or else any of Lance’s pranks and jokes would be scolded instead of appreciated. Even though Lance was Allura’s senior.

“Zarkon?” the guy with the long scar across his face and a white tuft for bangs asked. His expression was a mixture of fear and realization. Oh, so this was that alien that Zarkon had captured and became the new champion of their sick fights. Lance hummed softly, gaining Coran’s searching eye again. Uh-oh, Coran was really looking for him now.

“He was the King of the Galra,” she explained as if these creatures knew what the Galra were. By the looks of confusion, Lance knew immediately that the word wasn’t part of their vocabulary. There was a moment where Lance envied such cluelessness, that thought quickly disappearing as he was reminded of what he was. He was the last of the Notarai and he needed to remember to be proud of his abilities. “A vile creature and an enemy to all free people.”

“I remember now… I was his prisoner,” the man with the white tuft said in realization. Lance silently applauded himself for his correct guess. That was a lucky guess, he had to admit.

“He’s still alive? Impossible!” Allura screamed, adding a mocking and short laugh for good measure. She had this complex that everything she said was law, even when it obviously wasn’t. Although Lance kind of wished she was right about this, as that would’ve meant he hadn’t been fighting a losing battle for 10000 years, waiting for the day when he could get his Lion back and fight alongside some good pilots to destroy the monster who’d enslaved more than half the galaxy.

“I can’t explain it, but it’s true. He’s searching for a superweapon called Voltron,” the white tuft man explained and Lance snickered to himself. Of course he is, he wanted his Lion back just as much as Lance wanted his back. The Lions loved their paladins no matter who they were or any of their pasts, as long as their present self-was capable to pilot like true heroes. It was a feeling unlike any other, and anyone who experiences it never wants to lose it. But Black would never take Zarkon back, that much was for certain at least.

“He's searching for it because he knows it's the only thing that can defeat him, and that's exactly why we must find it before he does,” Allura said simply. Lance shook his head softly. She wasn’t going to tell them anything about Zarkon being the former leader of Voltron or anything really important. Was she even going to explain what Voltron was?

There was different small talk that ensued, nothing worth Lance’s time to really fully listen to. The big guy started eating the food goo, gagging a little as he did. Lance giggled inaudibly, they’d have to get used to the insanely disgusting food that the Altean’s ate.

“I can’t believe your civilization created such advanced technology 10000 years ago. It must have been an amazing place,” the white tuft guy exclaimed as he stared starry-eyed at the map of the stars scattered around the room. It was pretty impressive compared to other civilizations, but others were even more advanced… like the Olkari. The big guy with the headband groaned, slapping his face in irritation. Lance was puzzled, what was the purpose of such an action? It made a mischievous look dance in his eyes, these people were very interesting indeed.

“Yes, it was… but it’s gone and we’re the only Alteans left,” Coran looked down sadly. Lance was sad to say that he knew exactly what that felt like, empathy dripping from him like water out of a hose.

Lance turned to see four squeaking mice a few feet away from him. He looked at them curiously, the crescent markings on their chubby cheeks unmistakeable. Altean mice? Lance hadn’t ever heard of those before, at least not that size. They were usually at riding size and very loud and obnoxious. Allura seemed to notice them as well, an exaggerated gasp escaping her pink lips.

“Looks like we’re not the last, after all,” she exclaimed. She held out her hands to the little creatures and they ran on without so much as a flinch. Oh, so they were with her in the cryopod… probably. That guess was probably a little too far fetched, but he’d rarely ever been wrong so who was to tell.

Red lights began to flash simultaneously with loud blaring sirens. Lance HATED this noise, it was most definitely the most annoying sound he’d ever had the pleasure of hearing. And that’s from nearly 11500 years of experience.

“A Galra battleship has set its tracker on us!” Coran screamed as he looked at the giant screen that showed the ship up above. 

“How did they find us?” Allura inquired, mostly asking Coran. The small girl stabbed the short boy in the rib, gaining a confused but amused look from Lance.

“It’s probably Keith’s fault,” she giggled and Keith glared at her. Lance softly giggled, minding his volume to keep his presence hidden to everyone aside from Coran.

“Say whatever you want to make yourself feel better after getting us stuck on the other side of a wormhole!” Keith screamed, but his voice was laced with playfulness, proving that what they were saying really meant nothing. The girl gaped at him with mockery offense.

“We all agreed to go through that wormhole!” she growled. “It wasn’t just me this time!”

“Yeah, Pidge, but how were we supposed to know we’d end up here? You’re supposed to be the smart one,” Keith laughed, flicking her on the side of the head and Pidge pouted. Lance giggled softly again, swinging his legs back and forth in amusement. This species seemed very complex in their emotions and actions. Unlike Lance’s species, each person had a unique personality and didn’t all enjoy the same thing. Lance’s species was only mischievous know-it-all’s, him being a small exception by keeping himself from showing off all the time. His mischievousness exceeded his enjoyment in showing off, so he kept himself more mysterious than showing everyone everything that he knew all the time. His favorite thing was to watch others figure things out that he already knew.

“Stow it, cadets. This is no time to be messing around!” the white tuft guy growled, gaining a pout from the two of them and even from the big guy for whatever reason. “It’s time to work as a team,” Lance smiled- damn, that’s the new Black Paladin, isn’t it? “How long before they arrive?”

Coran began counting on his fingers. “At their speed,” he looked up in thought. Lance already knew they had a few hours to a day, but he also knew Coran would get the math wrong. Coran was always bad with math. “I’d say probably a couple of days.” Lance bit at his knuckle to keep from laughing out loud. 

“Good. Let them come! By the time they get here, you will have reformed Voltron, and together, we will destroy Zarkon's empire!” Allura exclaimed with her usual optimism. Although Lance couldn’t help but wonder how she was expecting that when she didn’t know he was there and only four people besides the Alteans and himself were present. Allura couldn’t sense him like Coran could, maybe Coran had nudged her or something. Probably.

“Princess, if I am not mistaken, there are five of these Lions. How are you suggesting we find them? We only have one,” the white tuft man asked. Apparently, they had one track minds as well, because they were only focused on that problem at the moment. There was no way this species would be able to sense Lance’s presence.

“King Alfor connected the Lions to Allura’s life force. She alone is the key to the Lions’ whereabouts,” Coran explained and Lance had to bite at his lower lip. ‘She alone’, that was the story they were going with, huh? Well, Lance guessed it made sense that Allura and Coran didn’t have the knowledge to know the former Paladins also had the power to find the whereabouts of each Lion, even if it wasn’t their own.

The star map moved as points were colored to show where the Lions were. The blue, green and purple beacons were all set in the same place- right on the ship. Lance smiled fondly at the thought of seeing Blue again. She’d been out of commission since King Alfor had locked Black in her hangar… after Zarkon betrayed them. 

“These are coordinates. The Black and Blue Lion look like they’re in the same place as the Green Lion,” Pidge observed and Lance’s eyes widened before his smile became even more amused. So she was smart… she’s definitely fit for the Green Lion from what he could tell. It was obvious that she wasn’t similar to the others in that respect, as they hadn’t realized that quite as quickly.

“Look at your primitive synapses firing away in their little brain cage,” Coran laughed as he lightly knocked against Pidge’s head. It was funny to think that Altean’s were also fairly similar to these beings as they had their diverse thoughts and different levels of learning.

“Very observant,” Allura applauded. “That’s because the Black and Blue Lions are in the castle.”

“To keep the Black Lion out of Zarkon’s hands, King Alfor locked it in the castle. It can only be freed if all of the Lions are present,” Coran explained. “Which means we have two to go.”

Yellow was going to be a little difficult to get and Red even more difficult from what Lance could tell. Poor creatures, they were definitely gonna have a fun time… and Lance supposed he’d have to assist them. He’d have to bond with his new team somehow after all. Can’t be TOO mysterious.

“As you have found, the Lions choose their pilots. It is a mystical bond and cannot be forced. The quintessence of the pilot is mirrored in his lion. Together, they form something greater than science can explain,” Allura explained surprisingly well for her first time. For someone who’d never experienced the bond, she knew more than he had expected. “The Black Lion is the decisive head of Voltron. It will take a pilot who is a born leader and in control at all times, someone whose men will follow without hesitation. That is why, Shiro,” she pointed to the man with the white tuft. How she knew his name was a mystery to Lance. Maybe the small talk had brought up names and titles. That was probably it. “You will pilot the Black Lion. The Green Lion has an inquisitive personality and needs a pilot of intellect and daring. Pidge, you will obviously be piloting the Green Lion,” she pointed to Pidge. Surprise, surprise there, it wasn’t like she was piloting him all the way here, to begin with. “The Yellow Lion is caring and kind,” she turned to the big guy. For a moment Lance was curious how she came to the conclusion of making him the Yellow Paladin. Lance nearly blew his cover when he realized what colors each person wore. “Its pilot is one who puts the needs of others above his own. His heart must be mighty. Hunk, as the leg of Voltron, you will lift the team up and hold them together.”

Hunk grunted at that, just as skeptical about it as Lance was skeptical at Allura’s leadership skills. She was not only picking the Lion’s Paladins for them but she was choosing them based on their color choice of the day! It made Lance want to laugh hysterically.

“The Red Lion is temperamental and the most difficult to master. It's faster and agiler than the others, but also more unstable. Its pilot needs to be someone who relies more on instincts than skill alone. Keith, you will fly the Red Lion.”

Pidge, for the second time, jabbed Keith in the rib with her elbow, teasingly saying, “Who would’ve thought you’d have so much in common with a giant robot space cat?”

“Unfortunately, I cannot locate the Red Lion's coordinates yet. There must be something wrong with the castle. After 10,000 years, it might need some work,” Allura sighed and Lance smiled. He knew exactly where Red was, but like hell, he was going to ruin his fun by telling them anything.

“Don't worry, we'll find it soon. They don't call me ‘The Coranic’ for nothing. It's because it sounds like ‘mechanic.’ So... Coranic, mechanic. It's not - It doesn't sound... exactly like it. It's similar,” Coran said. And that’s what finally got Lance. A howl erupted from deep inside Lance’s throat and he screamed with laughter. He hadn’t heard Coran make that joke in so long!

Everyone turned to him, Keith pulling out a knife from his pocket. That just made Lance laugh harder- what the hell was that kid doing with such a big and dangerous knife? He was really perfect for Red.

“Who would’ve indulged you so much to EVER called you ‘The Coranic’ in their lifetime?” Lance laughed so hard, tears began to prick at his eyes. “Oh, my god. Oh, my goodness. I totally forgot about that stupid quiznaking joke! Why did you do this to me?! You did this on purpose! You wanted me to come out of hiding! You cheated, that’s cheating!”

Coran shrugged. “Were you expecting me to search every nook and cranny of this castle?”

Tears spilled from Lance’s eyes as he screamed with laughter. He wrapped his arms around his waist to try and calm the burning in his stomach and chest. After a few long minutes, Lance sighed and wiped at his wet eyes. Then he floated over to them. The Notarai didn’t have legs that worked like any other, as they used them as a flexible whip-like weapon as opposed to a way of walking. So they just defied gravity instead.

“How we doing today, new teammates?” Lance grinned as he laid down in midair, stomach parallel to the ground and head resting on his hands. “The name’s Lance, Voltron’s left leg. Can’t wait to get to know you all… and everything about your beautiful species.”

Lance’s new teammates all looked at each other in fear and skepticism, before looking to Allura and Coran with the same look. Lance giggled as he turned to his childhood friend and the Princess he served for years.

“I’m slightly offended you two didn’t explain who I was before forcing me out of hiding,” Lance pouted as he looked to the two Alteans. They both shrugged lightly.

“Anyways…” Allura said before bringing all the five smaller holographic versions of the Lions together and they all formed Voltron. Lance grinned as everyone gasped in amazement. “Once all the lions are united, you will form Voltron, the most powerful warrior ever known, the Defender of the Universe.”

Hunk screamed a simple “Awesome!” before he went on a small rant. “Wait. Okay, we're going to be in there and flying lions. Got that part. How do lions turn into legs? Also, is this going to be a long trip? Because I have to pee. Do you people pee?”

Lance started howling with laughter again. Hunk pouted to what Lance could see, but Lance was too busy laughing to really noticing. Maybe Hunk would be good as the Yellow Paladin after all- he had the most common sense for certain.

“We don’t have much time,” Shiro said sternly. Hmmm, so Shiro wasn’t one for really listening to the team… that’s not good. “Hunk, Pidge and I will go in Green and get Yellow. Keith, you wait here. If you locate the Red Lion, go get it.”

“Hey, team leader,” Lance called to Shiro before they were gone. Shiro looked at Lance with more skepticism and fear than Lance would’ve liked. “You got a job for me?”

He narrowed his eyes towards Lance before sighing. “You can stay here and help Keith if they locate the Red Lion,” he ordered. Lance pouted but nodded anyway. This wasn’t gonna be a fun team like his old one, that was for sure.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments, please! Tell me your thoughts on this chapter. Tell me if I should change Lance's alien species name and if I should, give me a suggestion on what it should be. If you have any ideas on how I should make each of the Paladins react to the strange mischievous entity that is Lance, write it down in the comments.
> 
> I'm always up for chapter suggestions! So please, give them to me! I can't guarantee that it'll be that great but at least let me try.
> 
> Love you all <3 have a great week!


	10. Things Always Have to Change Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Keith is left with the strange aliens. He feels a lot more comfortable around the two Alteans than around the strange one that claims he's the Blue Paladin. There is something off about this character, a mischievous attitude that really doesn't make Keith feel welcome. It's kind of unnerving. But at the same time, Lance is a very easy going, fun-to-talk-to kind of person. Keith found himself more confused than anything at the strange alien.
> 
> Hunk needs to get the Yellow Lion, while he's completely annoying Shiro to death.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the second part of the previous chapter where Lance is an alien who has been alive for thousands of years. Once again, I looked at the actual dialogue for the first episode and changed it to make sense in this story. Some of the dialogue belongs to me but there's a large amount that does not.
> 
> This will probably be around 3-4 parts (probably), but if the majority of readers tells me they hate it, I'll stop. Please write in the comments whether or not I should indeed continue on or just abandon it.
> 
> The second part of this chapter is kind of rushed so I apologize. I tried to make it to the best of my ability, so please don't hate me. And I realize that Hunk's character is kind of weird. I don't really know how to fix him... I'm not the fluffy, sweet cinnamon roll kind of person who can make a flawless fluffy, sweet cinnamon roll type of character.

Keith glared at Lance, unsure of how to feel about him. He had this aura of mischief that made Keith uneasy, but he also seemed trustworthy… if you could call it that.

A big part of Keith’s concern was based on the appearance of the alien. He wasn’t as similar to humans as the Alteans were- they only had the crescent marks on their cheeks, the strange colored pupils and the pointed ears. He had the basic shape of a human: two eyes, two ears, two legs, two arms, a mouth, hair, a torso, etc. that all stayed in the same places as any human.

But the differences in the two species features outweighed the similarities. His skin was a muggy gray and looked extremely scaly from what Keith could tell, while his hair contrasted with pure white. It wasn’t a bad color scheme- in fact, quite the opposite. His eyes were bigger than any humans in proportion to the size of his head and had navy blue slits for pupils instead of the usual black ovals. The rest of his eyes were a vibrant blue, no white to be seen. His nose was pointed, it looked almost sculpted onto his face. His ears were longer and pointier than the Alteans, two blue hooped earrings on his left ear where his earlobe would be if he had one. His mouth looked like a gaping hole in his face- no lips to be found- while pointed but extremely straight white teeth showed even when his mouth was closed. When Lance talked, you could see the very vibrant red tongue protrude from his mouth, very snake-like in shape and length. In proportion to the rest of Lance’s body, his legs were extremely long and thin. They looked almost rubbery if Keith really thought about it. 

His clothes looked like human clothes: a black undershirt, a blue plaid button-up shirt that was completely unbuttoned, ripped black leggings, and dark blue vans. Of course, that’s probably not the terminology Lance would use to explain his outfit, but that’s what the Earth equivalent of his clothes was. 

“So what planet are you guys from?” Lance turned to him, holding his head up with his hand and tilting his head to the side. Even with the mischievous aura that Lance gave off, you could also hear the genuine curiosity and see it in his facial features. Lance was definitely giving off mixed signals.

“Earth,” Keith answered simply. He was expecting further questioning, as this was an alien in a galaxy that was light years away from the said planet.

“Oh!” Lance grinned so wide that you could see the gums that kept his teeth in his mouth. That didn’t seem like an easy feat to accomplish. It actually kind of hurt Keith's face as he looked, his cheeks aching as if he were trying to smile that wide. “I should’ve known! I’ve always wanted to meet Earthlings. They seemed so… interesting.”

“You know about Earth?” Keith questioned skeptically. Lance nodded frantically, smile somehow getting bigger. Keith thought that if Lance smiled any wider he might split his face. 

“I’ve seen it… through pictures created in my mind,” Lance laughed, putting his pointer finger against his temple. Keith’s face crinkled as he tried and failed to understand the explanation. “You see… if I concentrate (although there are sometimes when there’s something important enough that it just happens), I can see things from planets to peoples to current events, the list goes on. It’s actually pretty cool, although it hurts like a bitch afterward.”

“Allura’s in the room,” Coran chuckled and Lance practically screeched. Then he looked towards Coran and pouted.

“What the quiznack, Coran?!” Lance gasped, exaggerated hyperventilation as he looked towards the redhead in horror. Coran shrugged. Keith stared at the both of them in confusion before turning towards the alien princess who was quietly laughing to herself.

“King Alfor might not be able to have your head anymore but I sure can. So keep the naughty words to a minimum. Not only Allura but Keith! Keith, tell us, how old are you?” Coran turned towards Keith and Keith jumped at the sudden question. Then he let a little upward curve take over the corner of his lips.

“I’m 18-years-old,” he said. So Lance got scared because he cursed in front of Allura? “Why did you get all ‘dad’ on everyone all of a sudden?”

“And look! Keith is practically a baby!” Coran yelled, pointing a finger towards Keith.

Allura made her way over to Keith, smile still playing at her features. The loud argument that Coran and Lance were going through had become background noise as Allura began to speak with him.

“Coran is 19 years my senior,” she sighed with a fond smile. “Lance, Coran and I were the best of friends when I was younger. I believe that was because they believed it to be part of their jobs. That is not what is important, however.” She began to laugh out loud enough to get the others attention. “Coran and Lance would always get a good beating from my father every time they’d say any foul language with me in the same vicinity. Father would claim that it is not right to say such words near someone so much younger than you.”

Keith began to laugh as well.

“Father would just beat Coran up, as Coran is weak in any battle setting. While with Lance, Father would bring in the other Paladins and they’d all have a scrimmage, 4 against 1,” Allura explained and Keith could hear the offended gasp that escaped Coran. Allura began another laughing fit that subsided as quickly as it began. “Out of… 10 scrimmages, Lance won 4. He claims that he lost the other 6 on purpose.”

Keith’s jaw dropped. 4 against one and he won 40% of the fights!

“I did let them win! The one that started when I’d lost my arm was the only one that would’ve been impossible for me to win,” Lance grumbled the second part. The playfulness of the three reminded Keith of himself with Pidge, Shiro, and Hunk. That’s what made Keith realize that Lance was now supposed to join in their friendship. He was supposed to but would they allow him in? Lance was way too mischievous for Shiro to trust and if Shiro doesn’t trust someone neither does anyone else.

“You lost an arm?” Keith asked curiously. Lance grinned and held out his left arm. He showed a small button that was nearly invisible on his wrist. He pushed the button and the arm turned to metal, similar to what Shiro’s looked like.

“Yeah, it’s a crazy story. And too long to tell,” Lance giggled as he pushed the button again, turning it back into the muggy gray scaliness it was before. “So you are all Earthlings?” Lance turned to him, smirk on his face with a knowing look burning in his eyes. It made Keith uncomfortable as if Lance knew something that he didn’t.

“Yes,” Keith nodded slowly. Lance’s smile grew as he nodded back.

“Understood,” he mumbled. “We’ll see about that,” he added quietly, almost too silent for Keith to hear.

“I found the Red Lion!” Allura screamed happily. Keith ran over to where she was, expecting Lance to join him so they could both know where to go. But when Keith looked back, Lance was laying in the same place, eyes closed with a furrowed brow. Keith just shook his head and shrugged, there was no need for him anyway. “The Red Lion is… in the Galran ship?!”

Lance’s eyes snapped open and he was in front of them in seconds. Fear showed in his features.

“We need the others back right now,” Lance ordered. There was a loud bang and the castle shook. Lance fell down on the floor with a loud crash. “Shit!” he cursed. Another bang that flickered the lights of the castle. “Someone get me to Blue right now!”

Coran grabbed Lance by his legs, Lance’s legs stretching to grip onto Coran’s waist. Coran ran at a speed that didn’t seem possible out one of the many doors.

“Keith, you have to go as well. Lance will get you into the Galran ship,” Allura threw Keith what looked like the hilt of a sword. “That’s your bayard, an ancient weapon made for the Paladins. Lance will be able to give you directions if needed. Go quickly!”

Keith ran in the way that Coran and Lance left. He found his way to Blue somehow, Keith wasn’t really sure how. Blue opened her mouth to let him in, Coran walking out at the same time.

“Keith, we don’t have time, get in here!” Lance roared and there was another explosion. This one nearly blew Keith off of the ramp. “Ow, quiznack! Come on, before you die of old age!” Keith walked into the control room of Blue, the only difference between Blue and Green being the dull colored lights. Lance was no longer dressed in his Earth-looking clothes, but instead blue and white armor- a blue V across his chest. He threw something in Keith’s direction- which Keith caught and found to be matching armor in red.

“Put it on,” Lance ordered. “You want as much protection as possible. Allura gave you your bayard, am I right?”

Keith nodded. He still was a little confused at what was going on and Lance’s seriousness wasn’t helping. Keith only knew Lance for the span of a few hours, yet Lance’s attitude seemed so wrong to him. Keith slowly put on his armor over his clothes while staring at Lance’s back. Lance was no longer floating, which also felt just as wrong.

“Try to turn your bayard into a weapon,” Lance sighed when Keith was in his armor. Keith hadn’t even noticed that Lance had already taken his Lion to the skies.

“How do I do that?” Keith asked. Lance chuckled softly.

“Close your eyes,” when Keith complied, Lance continued. “You’re more of a knife or sword kinda guy, I’m assuming. So imagine that you’re holding a sword, one that is the perfect length, weight, size for you.”

Keith opened his eyes after a moment to find a beautiful red and white sword. It was absolutely amazing.

“Good job,” Lance praised. “You’re a quick learner.” Keith gave a nod of a thank you. “Alright, we’ve got an in. Be careful, use your instincts and you’ll find Red. Don’t call too much attention to your location.”

Keith fidgeted uncomfortably. He wasn’t ready for his first mission.

“Keith, you need to remember, Red won’t let you in unless you are harsh with him. He doesn’t accept scared little alien species as his paladins. You’ve got to disconnect yourself from any fear you might possess and force your way through his barriers. Understood?” Lance’s voice was hard as he spoke. Keith began to sweat, he wasn’t the right person for this Lion. Lance turned to him with a look that could kill. The blues in his eyes were lighting up, almost hypnotizing, and Keith had a hard time looking away. “Don’t think such bullshit. You are a nearly perfect match for Red, you just have that fear that masks that. Be that hot-headed fool that you hide and you will be fine.”

Keith nodded sharply and Lance skidded Blue to a stop right in front of a small hole in the side of the Galran ship.

“There’s not much time before the hole is patched, so get out. We’ve got communication through the helmets. If anything goes wrong, just talk through the helmet. Don’t you dare lose your helmet,” Lance ordered and Keith ran out of the opened mouth of Blue. “Good luck,” Lance sighed.

Keith didn’t know how this was going to turn out, but he couldn’t think about that now. He had to get Red.

  
  
  
  


“I thought Coran said this planet was peaceful!” Pidge shrieked as another laser blasted towards them. She just barely dodged it.

“Maybe ‘peaceful’ means something different in Altean,” Shiro grunted as another laser hit Green. The Lion rumbled and shook, nearly making Shiro fall to his knees. Hunk was already on his knees, throwing up any food goo he had eaten previously. 

“According to the coordinates, we’re right on top of the Yellow Lion. It’s below there, where they’re mining for the ore. They don’t even know the lion is there. Or maybe they just got here and they’re digging for the lion?” Pidge said as she stared at the coordinates.

“What does it matter?” Hunk whined as his stomach finally was empty.

“Hunk, I’m dropping you down there,” Pidge warned and Hunk practically screamed out of pure fear.

“Down there?! Me?! Oh, no, no, no, nonononono!” he cried. “There’s no way! I’m gonna die!”

“No, you won’t. I’ll cover you,” Pidge countered. 

“What about Shiro?” Hunk whimpered.

“The Yellow Lion isn’t Shiro’s Lion,” Pidge answered with a shrug.

“If I have to go, so does Shiro!” Hunk cried and Pidge sighed. She looked over her shoulder to see a calm Shiro.

“You okay with that?” she asked. He looked at her, smiled and nodded.

“You alright in here alone?” he asked and she nodded with a determined smile.

And that’s when they were both dropped from Green. It wasn’t expected and they both rolled more times then what was necessary.

Hunk and Shiro ran towards the opening in the mountain.

“Oh yeah, sure, just drop us off in an alien planet. That’s cool, man, it’s only occupied by mean purple aliens that want to kill us, but whatever. Just ignore them and go connect with a big, yellow mechanical cat. Easy-peasy. Yeah. That all makes a ton of sense,” Hunk ranted as he hotwired the elevator thing. Pidge was blocking the lasers that were fired towards them with Green, but both Shiro and Hunk still felt uneasy.

“Hunk, I think you need to calm down. We’ll be fine,” Shiro soothed as the elevator began to move them down the cave.

“Yes, calm down, because we’re not on our way to get a giant metal space cat while being fired at by big purple monsters,” Hunk’s voice got louder as he spoke. Shiro grabbed his shoulder and squeezed.

At the end of the elevator was a long cave covered in markings. They were similar to the ones they saw when they found Green. But at the end of the cave was a dead end.

“How are we supposed to get through that?” Hunk asked. But that sentence was answered with a loud bang and strong rumblings. Hunk and Shiro both fell down, the ground caving under them. 

“Pidge was supposed to cover us!” Hunk screamed as they fell down through the ground. Shiro just groaned, Hunk was being really annoying.

The free fall suddenly turned into a swirly slide before coming to an end right in front of the Yellow Lion. The Yellow Lion had its particle barrier open but as soon as Hunk was nearly going to crash into it, the barrier went down. So instead, he hit Lion’s foot.

“Owwwwww,” Hunk whined as he rubbed his nose. When his vision cleared, there sat the Yellow Lion, mouth wide open. Shiro was next to Hunk, pulling him up to his feet.

“The Yellow Lion’s inviting you in,” Shiro said with so much pride that Hunk would’ve mistaken him for a father. Hunk nodded and went into the control room of the Lion, a soft yellow glow being the only lights. Shiro was right behind him when he sat down, and gave him a confident squeeze to his shoulder. “Let’s get back to the castle.” Hunk nodded and somehow caught on to how to pilot the giant alien space cat in seconds.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comment down below your thoughts and opinions of this chapter. Am I portraying the characters badly? Should I do something different? Should I stop writing this story altogether? (I turned total professional youtuber on you just now, wow!)
> 
> If there is anything you'd like to criticize about this chapter, don't hesitate to tell me. I can take anything you throw at me!
> 
> If you have any suggestions for future chapters, write it down in the COMMENTS (I love getting comments, please please please, I'm begging you to write me a comment!) and I'll start on it. I WILL get out everyone's suggestions (whether good or bad) eventually. And if you didn't like how I used your suggestion, you can tell me and I'll rewrite it to your liking.
> 
> Thank you so much for reading! I love you all <3


	11. Things Always Have to Change Part 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This team might not work out. Lance knew that he wasn't gonna be right for the new team, but what was he supposed to do? 
> 
> Part 3 of the Alien Lance fic.
> 
> (I know this is a really shitty summary but I didn't know what else to say so.... why not just read the actual fic, am I right?)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How we doin', my dudes?
> 
> Another week has gone by, and only one (or two) left until this little story is over! I hope you all enjoy reading it because I very much enjoy writing it!
> 
> I want to give you a heads up that I might not be able to update on Monday next week. It's a HUGE maybe and if I can't, I'll update sometime next week, I promise!
> 
> I know that excuses are overrated but I do have them. I came out a while ago to my family as bisexual and they ain't taking it great. So not only do I got all the work and school to deal with but constant questions and shit coming my way from my fam. It's getting really stressful so I hope you can understand and still read my stuff even if I'm a few days late! If you can't, well then, that's extremely rude... T-T

Lance realized pretty quickly that he wasn’t right for this team. They were able to form Voltron once, that was certain. But Lance knew all too well that forming Voltron the first time was more of a trial run than anything. The first time was easy peasy, the Lion would do all of the work and there was nothing to it. But the second time, you were supposed to be able to have a strengthened bond with both your Lion and all of the Paladins. He could tell that it wouldn’t take much time for them to bond with their Lions and with each other, but with him- that was a different story.

Anything Lance said was greeted with more than skeptical looks or just full blown glares. Shiro obviously hated Lance deeply, the reason probably being the insane amount of mischievousness and just plain intelligence in the field of Voltron. Lance understood Shiro and kept his distance when he could.

Pidge and Hunk had a similar problem but they were a little nicer about it. They didn’t glare at him when walking by him and Hunk even gave Lance a taste of one of the attempts of an Earth “cookie”. It tasted awful, but Lance wasn’t gonna say that to someone who already didn’t like him.

Lance spent most of his time hanging around Allura and Coran or in Blue’s control room. It was exactly like before, just with different people. Although now he didn’t get the playful comments from his teammates saying that he should work instead of playing with children all the time.

“Alright, here we go, Paladins,” Coran called through the training deck’s speakers. Lance groaned, aware of the training of which they were going through this time. This training didn’t really work all that well with his levitating body, but it never stopped his old team before. “There will be a circle of robots shooting at all of you. Your job is not to dodge but to protect your teammates. You’ve got the shields, so shield yourself and make sure to shield your fellow Paladins. Good luck!”

There was a moment where they all stood all antsy. Lance just sighed, rolling his shoulders. He wouldn’t move up and down at all unless getting hit. He’d always abided by that rule, one of the only ones ever made for this training. When he got hit, he’d fall down the hole just like everyone else was supposed to. He’d done this training many times and even did so alone at one point, so he felt ready.

The others, on the other hand, didn’t seem as confident. Hunk looked on the verge of tears. Lance put a comforting hand on his shoulder.

“Don’t worry,” Lance tried to reassure him. “Just keep your eyes peeled and you should be fine. If you get hit, you’ll just fall through the floor and somehow end up in the room with Coran.” Lance let his hand wander up to where Coran was, through the glass. “You’ll be perfectly fine.”

Hunk gave him a shaky smile, whispering a “Thank you” in response. Lance gave him another pat on the shoulder before the training started.

It caught Lance off guard when the bot in front of him suddenly fired towards Hunk. Lance quickly moved his shield in front of Hunk, stopping the “laser” from hitting him. Then he pushed away from Hunk, in order to get a better view of the situation around him. A few seconds later, Hunk was sobbing and was sent down the shoot. Pidge soon followed as Shiro had just barely missed blocking one of the lasers and allowed it to hit Pidge’s back.

Lance sighed in disappointment. Keith and Shiro were practically on the other side of the circle from him now, back to back. Keith noticed Lance and tried to wave him over, but Shiro was nearly hit because he wasn’t paying attention. Lance laughed a little to himself.

“How we doin’ over there, Pala-dudes?!” Lance called as he spun in the air to miss one heading for him. He wasn’t supposed to dodge, but there wasn’t much else he could do without any backup. One was shot from the bot closest to Lance, heading straight towards Shiro, which Lance speedily stopped.

“Would be a lot better if we had more backup!” Keith answered back with a playful tone. Keith was the only one who was getting there in the trust department. Lance had sent some light-hearted pranks Keith’s way, which Keith had taken as just that. The two were a lot closer than Lance was with any of the other Paladins. Lance felt the similar feelings that he felt for Alfor, for Keith, which made Lance a little panicked sometimes. But he tended to avoid thoughts like that.

“Yeah well, if you two hadn’t decided to go so far off on your own, you would have more,” Lance laughed as he blocked another going in the direction of his teammates. He had to move faster than he was used to after 10000 years, so Lance was surprised at how well he was doing. “Maybe you two should make your way over to me instead.”

“One of us has the ability to levitate,” Shiro growled bitterly. It wasn’t the same as the playful way Lance and Keith were talking to each other, Shiro was more petty about it. Lance frowned for a split second before laughing.

“That’s cheating,” Lance said simply. “If I moved above them, that’d be unfair, since you two can’t do the same thing.”

“That’s bullshit,” Shiro growled.

“Shiro, chill out,” Keith said.

“This isn’t some game, this is training,” Shiro continued, ignoring Keith. “You have to act the way you would in battle. What are you, a child?”

“Shiro…” Lance said calmly, now just inches away from Shiro’s face with his shield propped in between his feet in order to keep both him and Shiro from getting hit. He smiled dangerously. His eyes dully glowed blue. “I may be a Paladin of Voltron. I may be a ‘hero’ that will forever be a legend to some. I might be the jokester, mischief maker, Lance. But you better watch what you say. I’ve had my hands dirty for a long time now, and right now, I’m not afraid to get my hands dirty because of you. Don’t you dare ever try to insult me to my face. That is not the way of the Black Paladin, and I shall never take orders from another faulty leader again.”

Shiro was stunned, pure fear in his eyes. Keith was the only thing keeping him from falling through the floor by this point, other than Lance’s stance in front of him.

“Sorry about that, Shiro,” Lance laughed as he patted Shiro’s head. “I went a little too far, my bad.”

Lance moved so that his body was perpendicular to the floor, just as if he were walking on thin air. His feet were about an inch above the ground, yet he still towered over Shiro by almost three feet. Lance had to be about 9 feet tall. He got hit in seconds and fell through the floor just like the others. He waved as he left, Shiro joining him soon after, then followed by Keith.

“You broke one of your most important rules, Lance,” Coran shook his head sadly. Everyone looked towards Lance with an angry glare, while Lance just shrugged. Keith was the only one who looked surprised. 

“I just felt a little rebellious, I guess,” Lance answered with a shrug. “Just wanted to show off some things I could do when I use my levitation to my advantage.” Shiro went pale. Keith looked at Shiro, both wide-eyed. Lance smirked when he saw the reactions. “Sorry, man. What’s the punishment this time ‘round?”

Coran groaned, rubbing at his eyes.

“I thought you’d have learned by now, Lance,” Coran sighed. Then he laughed. “You really do act just like a little kid sometimes.” Lance laughed harshly.

“Sometimes, for sure,” he answered. He took a glimpse at Shiro, who looked like he was a ghost.

“Let’s see,” Coran sighed, holding his head up with his hands in the universal sign of someone deep in thought. “How about just a regular old gladiator fight then?” Coran smiled at Lance and Lance giggled.

“And by regular old, you mean with no weapons, no armor, and no legs, am I right?” Lance chuckled. Coran nodded happily.

“And you either survive for 20 doboshes or you break,” Coran added proudly.

“That’s barbaric,” Pidge mumbled and Coran laughed.

“You bet it is! But it’s the only way to make a punishment for this old guy!” Coran jerked his thumb in Lance’s direction.

“No legs?” Hunk whispered in confusion. 

“Let’s do it! I’m ready!” Lance laughed as he floated to the door, the others behind him. Keith eyed Shiro accusingly.

“Get all that pesky armor off near the training deck door so that it’ll be easier to collect!” Coran called.

“Who are you, my mom?!” Lance laughed back.

“I’m a lot nicer than your mom!” 

“HA, jokes on you, I never had one, bitch!” That caught the other’s attention, not to Lance’s surprise.

“You don’t?” Keith asked in surprise. Lance knew immediately that this joke might not be right for Keith, as he was an orphan. How did Lance know that? Visions are amazing things sometimes.

“My home planet didn’t have family units,” Lance answered with a shrug. “Notarai weren’t really created the same as most other alien species anyways. We were all created from different flowers that were grown on our planet.”

“So your mom was a flower?” Hunk asked and Lance snorted.

“I guess you could say that,” Lance laughed. 

“What did your flower look like?” Pidge asked curiously.

“I’m not sure. It was destroyed pretty quickly after I was created since it didn’t work right.”

“It didn’t work, right? How so? It seemed to have worked pretty well to me,” Keith grunted.

“I wasn’t the outcome they were looking for. They made every Notarai an exact copy of another. Well, not physically but mentally. I was too… self-aware and nice for them, even with the modifications.”

“Who’s ‘they’?” Keith asked, looking to get angry. Lance giggled a little as he looked at the long haired boy. He really was cute, especially when angry over trivial matters.

“The creators,” Lance shrugged. “I don’t remember much about them. Although I do remember being scared shitless by them.”

Lance pulled off his armor, one piece at a time, at the door. He wasn’t quite ready to do this kind of punishment, but he wasn’t gonna allow himself to fall to a gladiator. 

“Coran, my dude, at least let me use my legs to move around the room a little faster,” Lance called and Coran snickered in reply. “Come on, old pal, do you wanna kill me? I’m old and creaky after those 10000 years!”

“I dunno, you were never let off before,” Coran sighed.

“Just this once, old buddy,” Lance begged and Coran sighed in defeat.

“Fine,” he said with an exaggerated groan. “But just so for movement. If I see you blocking or hitting the gladiator with those, I’ll skin you.”

“Gotcha, Uncle Coran,” Lance waved him away with a laugh. Coran laughed in reply. 

The gladiator slowly made its way out of the ground from the tiny hole on the other side of the room. Lance giggled as he saw it, it had been a long time. It looked a little old.

“I remember, long ago, when you decided to marry Allura and I was stuck with that gorgeous hunk of metal,” Coran laughed. Lance snorted.

“What a silly game that was,” Lance laughed. “Definitely not one for someone so old.”

“Stop acting all high and mighty, old man,” Coran chuckled. The gladiator lit up and Lance sighed deeply.

“That’s not the kind of thing you should say to your senior, is it, little mustache face?” Lance laughed as the gladiator ran at him. This was one of the highest levels that the gladiator could go, moving and dodging at speeds that some couldn’t even see. 

Lance flew towards it, just higher than it could reach. He swooped down a millisecond after it passed him, grabbing at the chin piece. His legs stretched to the ground, pulling him down quickly as he used as much strength as he could muster to crush the chin piece. He heard the soft crackling of electricity.

The gladiator used its stick to jab at Lance’s face and Lance moved backward out of reach. He used his stretchy legs to grab onto a nearby pillar and pulled him to it, throwing himself back at the gladiator full force. The gladiator tried to stop Lance’s attack with the electrified stick, but nothing could possibly save it.

Lance let out a pained groan as he went headfirst into the electric stick. He fell on the floor as electricity crackled inside of his very electric fragile body. Being made from a flower came with its downsides of being extremely flammable and prone to horrible burns from the smallest of volts of electricity. Lance looked towards where he’d hit the gladiator, smiling when he saw it limp on the floor.

“I win!” Lance grinned as he pulled himself into a sitting position. He wouldn’t be able to levitate for a while, which meant no movement unless someone carried him. “Woohoooo!”

“You okay?” Keith asked with an outstretched hand. Lance laughed.

“I just got a few thousand volts of electricity flowing through my flower-made body,” he answered with a giggle. “I’ve definitely felt better. But at least I won!”

Keith shook his head with a laugh. “That move was really reckless, you know.”

“Oh, I know,” Lance laughed. “But those are the kinds of moves that can make or break your chances at survival. Sometimes the best solution is the most reckless one.”

“Right,” Keith rolled his eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments are my favorite thing in the WHOLE WORLD (aside from my gf and friends and yadda yadda yadda, not important)! Please send me comments. I will read and I will reply if I feel like I need to. Constructive criticisms, suggestions, random thoughts that might have nothing to do with anything- I love it all! It will make my day, so please give me some idea of what kind of people I'm writing for!
> 
> Tell me what you think of the characters. Am I doing alright portraying them? What should I do differently in future chapters? Do you like what I've done to Lance? Does he have a likable and interesting point of view? Did you like the friendship between Coran and Lance? Do you want more of that before this is over or are you done with that?
> 
> For the next chapter, should I have it Lance's POV or Keith's or maybe even Shiro's? Tell me what you think!
> 
> Have a great week and I hope to update again by next Monday! If not, I will update before Friday!


	12. Things Always Have to Change Part 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is the final chapter of the Alien Lance fic!
> 
> Lance confronts Shiro, one on one.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Turns out stress actually makes me write MORE! Who would've thought? So I decided that I was going to update today since I already finished. I wrote a really lot this week, more than I think I ever have (I think I might have a problem with how much I write).
> 
> I've finished every single suggestion story I've been given throughout the span of this week, meaning that next week will start a strand of those stories! I'm sorry to all those who asked me to write something, I'm sorry for the long wait. But they're coming, I promise!
> 
> Please read and enjoy the final chapter!

“Shiro, can I talk with you for a bit?!” Lance called from across the halls. The others all looked towards Lance, then to Shiro. Shiro was facing away from Lance, but Lance could see him tense up and clench his fists. “Don’t worry, man. It’s not like I’m gonna murder you. I just want a chance to talk with you in private.”

Shiro took a deep breath before turning around, glaring at Lance. Lance smiled, waving at him for a moment.

“What do you want to talk about?” Shiro asked.

“Why don’t you come to find out?” Lance answered with a little laugh. “Just a few minutes, one on one talk, wherever you wanna go.”

“Fine,” Shiro sighed. “Let’s do this then.”

The others all stared in awe as Shiro forced his way into Lance’s room. Lance smiled brightly at them, waving to each of them.

“I really am not going to kill him, you know,” he informed them and eyebrows furrowed. Keith had a pleased grin that contrasted the others looks of concern and confusion. 

Lance floated through his opened door before pushing the button to close it. Shiro was scanning the room curiously.

The room was spotless, not to Lance’s surprise. He’d never really used the room much. He slept in Blue- he needed the kind presence in the back of his mind soothing him to sleep, to keep the night terrors away. He didn’t use the bathroom, any waste in his body being thrown out through natural gases through his skin cells. All Lance had was his regular clothes and his Paladin armor, really not in need of anything more. He’d always been prepared for the day he’d finally get kicked off the team, now more than ever.

“What do you want?” Shiro growled and Lance crossed his legs in midair. He stared at Shiro, forcing eye contact.

“I want to understand you, Shiro,” Lance informed, trying to radiate as much maturity as possible. “And I want to find a way to get you to trust me.”

“That’s impossible,” he shrugged.

“There has to be something,” Lance sighed. “As long as you don’t trust me, there will be no forming Voltron. Trust is key for this team. After all, I’m going to have full control of one of your limbs.”

Shiro shook his head.

“You’re just too… childish,” he sighed.

“Do you wanna know something?” Lance smiled as he spoke and Shiro continued to glare back. Shiro sat down on the bare bed. “I’m gonna give you a brief Notarai history lesson if you are alright with that.”

Shiro didn’t say anything for or against it, so Lance took that as an invitation.

“I’ve already explained that Notarai are made out of flowers and that mine was unsuccessful,” Lance stated, sighing as he thought of how to explain. “Well, Notarai are meant to be mischievous and stupidly intelligent. Most Notarain’s were made from the most common flower on the planet, one that manipulated other flowers into becoming their kind. After given bodies, the creators would manipulate the minds that they’d created, turning them into carbon copies of each other. Notarai was a planet filled with people who acted the same, thought the same, did the same things. There was no diversity of thought. Everyone knew everything they needed to, they did what they needed to, and they all loved it.

“But my flower- a very unique and small flower that only grew in clumps in the caves- wasn’t like the others. Its personality was different, not manipulative and mischievous in the slightest. Instead of forcing other flowers to turn into another copy of itself, it used its radiant, glowing blue to catch the eyes of anyone who saw it.

“The creators used it, to make me and only me. After I was created, they realized how different I was in personality from the others. I was kind in comparison to the others and I didn’t like the pranks and manipulations the others did. Nobody liked me, but they all couldn’t take it upon themselves to dislike me either. I was what they all referred to as unnatural, both in personality and in appearance.

“I was taken back by the creators and they tried everything they could to make me just like all the others, another carbon copy. They injected me with some of the other flowers, hoping that it would manipulate mine into changing my mind into one like the others. They spent years using all sorts of different tech in order to change me.”

“And it worked,” Shiro spoke, saying that as a statement. Lance chuckled softly. He shook his head slowly.

“Not quite,” Lance answered. “I appear to have been successfully manipulated due to my love for pranks and mischief. But my appearance is still much different and well, I’m far from a carbon copy.

“The others had a green tint to their skin and their hair was bright red, similar to their flowers. Their eyes were a solid black. They all wore the same exact smile and it never ever left their faces. They were purely cocky and mischievous.

“Shiro, I know you don’t know me all that well but tell me, have I never once been anything more than a pompous ass who pranks everyone all the time? Have I never been serious?”

Shiro didn’t answer for a while. “I don’t know,” he answered honestly.

“Do I not sound serious right now?” Lance questioned.

“You seem to be,” he shrugged.

“I was exiled from Notarai because I was still so different after so many years of the creators trying everything they could,” Lance sighed. “And ever since, I’ve had to deal with people like you, not being able to trust me. All because of the mischievousness that was implanted into me, that is purely artificial.”

“I’m sorry, Blue Paladin,” Shiro muttered after being silent for far too long.

“My name’s Lance, Shiro,” Lance laughed. “Can you find it in yourself to gain some trust in me?”

“I’ll try,” Shiro nodded. Lance fisted the air happily.

“Also, I wanted to say, I’m sorry about exploding at you during that training. But I’d really like you not to question my motives for some things. I’d rather not have to deal with a punishment for every single training exercise we try, you know?”

“I should apologize for that as well,” Shiro sighed. “It was wrong of me to say those things to you. Following orders is not childish and I’m very sorry to have said so.”

“You can call me childish all you want,” Lance laughed. “Just when you’re saying it as purely offensive, I think you’re pushing it.”

“Understood,” Shiro smiled for the first time Lance had ever seen. “Is that it, Lance?”

“Oh, right, I also wanted to remind you that I’m the eldest,” Lance laughed. “So I have privileges.”

“Yes, senior citizen privileges, maybe,” Shiro laughed in return. Lance pouted.

“That’s extremely rude. I can’t even retaliate because you weren’t stuck in a cryopod for 10000 years! That’s unfair!” Lance whined and Shiro shrugged.

“I’m looking forward to working with you, Lance,” Shiro informed. Lance grinned happily.

“Yay! It’s been so long since I’ve felt any sort of acceptance!” Lance cheered.

“I have a question actually if you don’t mind,” Shiro cut off Lance’s cheers. Lance looked at him curiously and nodded him to continue. “I keep hearing a lot of things about something between you and the princess’s father. I’m just curious as to what that something is.”

Lance laughed nervously, biting his lower lip awkwardly.

“I guess it wouldn’t hurt,” he sighed. He waited a moment, positioning himself so his legs were criss-cross-applesauce a few feet above the ground. “Well, there’s this myth that the Blue and Red Paladins usually gain sort of… a romantic relationship, you see.”

“So, King Alfor and you were together and he cheated?” Shiro asked, not thinking much of it at all.

“Oh, no, not at all!” Lance shook his head quickly. “Alfor wasn’t that kind of person at all.”

“Then what was it?” Shiro questioned.

Lance laughed nervously as he scratched the back of his neck. “I confessed to him and he tried it out, but decided that he didn’t feel the same. His reason being that he couldn’t be with someone who didn’t seem serious, even during the most important moments. Then a week later, he was engaged.”

“Oh…” Shiro cringed.

“I’m ashamed to say that it took me a very long time to recover from it all,” Lance sighed. “But the near 5 years I spent recovering were mostly spent bonding with all of the Lions, so it wasn’t a complete waste of time, at least.”

“I’m sorry, Lance. I can’t imagine what that feels like,” Shiro whispered. “I should not have asked.”

“Oh, no. It was 10020 or so years ago. I’ve had plenty of time to heal over old crushes,” Lance laughed.

“You said the Red and Blue Paladins?” Shiro inquired. Lance smirked.

“That’s right, my dear leader,” Lance chuckled.

“Yeah, for now, I’d advise you not to start anything with my adopted son,” Shiro warned. “I mean, that’s kind of pedophilia if you think about it. So no.”

“Woah, chill out,” Lance laughed loudly. “I wasn’t planning anything. Plus, who says what counts as pedophilia? Where’s the border?”

“You say you’re older than 10000 years old… I’d say that’s crossing the border,” Shiro laughed. “Keith’s 18,” Shiro whispered matter-of-factly.

“But if you really think about it, I’m more like 22 in both appearance and mentality,” Lance answered, pointing a finger to his head. Shiro rolled his eyes, chuckling a bit as he walked towards the door.

“Just keep your distance for now,” he warned before leaving Lance in the room all alone.

Lance groaned before laughing, softly muttering, “that’s fair” under his breath. 

That was a lot easier than Lance had thought. Maybe this team wouldn’t be so bad after all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story was really horribly finished, mostly because I have the hardest time ending things. So if someone has any advice on how to finish a fanfic, please... I obviously need the advice! 
> 
> Should I have done something different for this last confrontation? What should I have done differently? What would've made a good climax?
> 
> Write in the comments what else you'd be interested in reading from me. Give me some suggestions so that I don't run out any time soon. I want to keep this going for as long as I can!  
> Tell me what you thought about this story. Should I make more Alien Lance fics? Should I make an Altean Lance fic? (If you think so, please give me something specific n the comments because I REALLY want to make one but I don't have any idea on what to do)


	13. He'll be Fine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Suggestion: tinlizzie  
> "Can he maybe lose a limb or something? Maybe become paralyzed? idk, just an idea."
> 
> Lance gets some really bad battle wounds and lost his communications.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another week has gone by and I finally got out another suggestion! YAY!
> 
> If there is anything that anyone (especially tinlizzie) has a problem with, please write it in the comments below and I'll fix it.

“Lance, I need some backup over here! Stop sitting around and actually pay attention to your job!” Pidge screamed through the coms. There was only a bit of static in reply. “Lance, get your ass over here!”

Lance lay on the floor, breathless and bloody. His helmet was broken, only harsh static in his ears from the coms. He could just make out someone speak, but other than that, there was nothing. He let his head lull to the side in order to look around him. To his left was nothing, to his right… nothing. Was this really his surroundings or was this just what his head was showing him?

He heaved a cough, blood spurting to the floor beside him. He let out a long exhale, blood slipping into his mouth for a second before slipping back down where it came from.

“Hello? Can anybody hear me?” Lance struggled to say, eyes getting heavy. He sighed, only hearing static as a greeting.

Lance slowly moved his upper body into a sitting position. His shoulder screamed at the movement, but he couldn’t do anything about it. He heaved out breath after breath, heavy and painful. He turned his head, taking in the injuries.

His arm was cut off by the shoulder. It was a horrific sight and he’d already thrown up a lot looking at it. But that was a purely clean cut. The real disgusting thing to see was his legs. One was ripped clean off- physically ripped, not cut. Strings of skin and muscle showed exactly that. His bone jaggedly poked from where the skin and muscle had been torn off. The other leg had been cut several times, very gruesomely, with claws. Bone showed in some places, while others just bled to hide it. 

“Please hear me,” Lance sighed, letting a few tears of pure pain escape from his beautiful blue eyes. He couldn’t tell how he’d make it out without somebody’s help. “I could really use some help right about now.”

His eyes lulled closed for a second before being shot back open. He slowly moved so he was being supported by his only uninjured limb and his shredded leg. It hurt like hell, but he couldn’t linger on the pain. Even with the white splotches appearing in his vision, he had to suppress the pain.

He pushed himself up, leaning against the wall while his shredded leg supported him. He gasped for air, coughing every few breaths, spilling blood and mucus from his mouth as he did. His only hand grabbed onto a handle, which was luckily very close by, and jumped. Surprise, surprise, his shredded leg wasn’t very good at holding him up. He nearly fell to his knee, slamming face first into the door. Well, he slammed face first into the door but was able to hold himself up before landing.

His vision was just pure static for a few seconds before it just became a blurry mess. He took a deep breath and opened the door, finding himself in a long hallway. There was the sound of bodies collapsing and Lance hoped that somebody could find him.

Lance felt more hot tears in his eyes as he saw the person turning the corner. Keith Kogane, thank the almighty Lord!

Keith skidded across the hall when he caught a glimpse of Lance standing in the doorway. Lance coughed quietly, blood splattering onto the fist covering his mouth. He whimpered.

“Lance? What the hell? Pidge has been calling for you for like two minutes. It sounds like she’s in trouble,” Keith didn’t sound all too happy to see him. Lance whimpered again. He knew that Keith couldn’t see what was wrong at the moment- the door being in the way- but Keith’s angriness just hurt.

“M-my coms aren’t… working,” Lance coughed mid-sentence, tears of pain in his eyes as he tried to move his leg into a more comfortable position. He had to bite his lip to keep the scream from escaping.

“What wrong with you? Help me get to Pidge!” Keith growled and Lance’s tears fell slowly.

“S-sorry,” Lance whispered. “I… I d-don’t think I-I can d-do th-that.”

Keith walked towards Lance, a glare on his face. He grabbed Lance’s collar from around the door, the wounds still not visible to Keith. Keith pulled him over and Lance yelped.

“I-I can’t! N-no, p-please!” Lance screamed as Keith pulled him up off the ground by his collar. As soon as Keith looked at Lance, Keith dropped him out of pure surprise. Lance’s leg collapsed underneath him and he let out an agonizing scream. Tears slipped rapidly down Lance’s face as he screamed, blood spilling from his mouth as he did. He clutched at his already massacred leg desperately (the best he could with a single hand), as if that could stop the pain.

“L-Lance? W-what the hell happened?!” Keith yelled as he fell to his knees in front of Lance. “Guys, I need help right now! Lance is hurt and bleeding like crazy and I can’t move him!” Keith yelled into the coms. There was a moment of silence. “I already said I can’t move him! He’s hurt really bad and I don’t think I can carry him! Hunk, Shiro, somebody else, I don’t fucking know! I’m not strong enough for this!”

Lance blacked out, as the pain grew too great. He woke up quickly afterward, waking to the searing pain of movement. He screamed and thrashed around in retaliation.

“Lance! Lance! Stop it! You need to calm down!” Keith screamed as he tried to hold Lance still. Lance just screamed more as Keith had directly touched one of the deeper of the cuts in his last leg.

“Let go! Let go, please, dear god, let me go!” Lance sobbed as Keith pressed his hand against his cut. “God, it hurts, it hurts, plEASE, LET GO!!”

“Calm down, Lance. It’ll be ok, just breathe, ok, buddy?” Hunk said from directly above Lance. Lance looked up to find that he was actually being carried by his best friend. The thought soothed him and he took a shaky breath.

“Please, take your hand off of my leg,” Lance said in a pathetic whisper and Keith quickly pulled his hand away. He looked apologetic and surprised, unaware of the fact that he was grabbing Lance’s destroyed leg like an idiot.

“I’m sorry,” Keith said quickly. Lance nodded weakly.

“You’re moving so much, Hunk, it hurts,” Lance muttered as his eyes closed. He tilted his head so it was against Hunk’s armor. “Just let me down and leave me, please.”

“There’s no way I’m gonna do that, Lance, and you know it,” Hunk growled. “Don’t say things like that to me ever.”

“Please…” Lance sighed. “It… hurts… so bad… please… stop moving.”

“We’re almost there, Lance,” Hunk sighed. “And then we’ll get you into a healing pod and you’ll be fine.”

“But… it hurts,” Lance sobbed.

“I know, buddy,” Hunk sighed. “Just… think about something else. Think about your family and how proud they’ll be when you make it back home to them. Do you remember your abuela’s home-cooked chimichangas? They were heavenly, the best thing I’d ever tasted. Do you remember the time I tried to sneak a peek at the recipe and she threw me out of your house, saying that I have to change my ways before I can get my hands on such an important recipe? I remember it like it was yesterday. I’m sure you have thousands of those kinds of stories, don’t you?”

“Yeah,” Lance let out a breathy laugh. “I remember.”

“Can’t you just taste them, fresh of the pan?” Hunk licked his lips. Lance coughed harshly before nodding slowly.

“Yeah, I miss abuela,” Lance muttered.

“You’ll get to see her again,” Hunk assured.

“No, I won’t,” Lance sighed. “Not in this life anyway.”

“Lance, you’re not gonna die,” Hunk grumbled.

“Maybe not,” Lance grunted, starting a long coughing fit again. “I guess I forgot to tell you that she died after we’d left for the garrison. Sorry, buddy.”

“Oh,” Hunk whispered before sighing, shaking his head sadly. “Well, she sure was great, wasn’t she?”

“Yeah, definitely,” Lance coughed. “Hunk?”

“What is it, bud?”

“Am I useless now?”

“What?” Hunk stopped and Lance winced. He’d started to get used to the slow movements and the sudden stop turned his body to flames.

“Nevermind,” Lance mumbled and pushed his forehead against Hunk’s breastplate armor, loving the coldness. Hunk continued to the Yellow Lion, Keith turning towards Red.

“You alright, Lance?” Hunk asked as he sat him on the cushiest of the seats in Yellow. Lance didn’t say anything. A momentary panic settled inside of Hunk, but after checking his pulse, found that Lance had just passed out again.

Hunk speedily got back to the castle and a healing pod was waiting. Keith and Hunk waited for days until Lance had fallen out of the pod. It took that long until they had really let it set into their brains… Lance was going to be fine.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, hello!
> 
> Please write something in the comments for me. What did you like/dislike about the chapter? What would you like to see less/more of? What did you eat while reading this? Anything at all. Even write in the comments if you didn't read it! That'd be weird actually...
> 
> If there was anything that you didn't like, please write it down below. If I had some gigantic error that I didn't pick up on (because I'm a failure and don't actually edit my own stories) please tell me. I eventually read over my stuff again and find out and then I just feel REALLY stupid (I hope someone can relate because if not I'm gonna be so alone in this world T-T)


	14. Insignificant

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Suggestion: Tori  
> "So I though that you could do one about lance having night terrors from some sort of PTSD and people try to come and comfort him but he locks the door and slowly loses himself in the darkness of his own room. Just an idea.   
> Thanks!"
> 
> Summary:  
> Lance can't stop thinking about those few moments that he was greeted by death. Just a few moments, nothing compared to Shiro's suffering. But those few moments won't stop haunting him, and it's finally appeared to the others of the group. But Lance will never tell them what's wrong because it's pathetic. He couldn't tell them that he couldn't even close his eyes just from a few minutes of being dead.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I loved writing this one! It was so close to home that I made myself cry writing it XD. I hope you all like it!
> 
> It's a little short, but well... short and sweet, right?
> 
> I hope I was able to convey the emotions well enough. If there's anything one of you think I should do better, please don't hesitate to share.

Lance sucked in a breath, holding his knees to his chest to try and make himself as small as possible. His body shook violently as he breathed shakily. It had been weeks since the accident happened, yet he couldn’t stop the constant flow of nightmares that greeted him, even from just blinking. At least when he was awake, he could tell that they were just in his mind. But as he slept, he couldn’t tell what was real until he was silently sobbing in the corner of Red’s control room.

Since he’d died, he’d been lucky that he was never around anyone when he’d had an episode. Although he was constantly exhausted, he was able to keep himself awake… somehow. He knew he’d mess up eventually, and now it had happened.

He’d fallen asleep in the middle of a meal. They’d finally gotten a chance to stop their long journey home, and were enjoying a delicious meal as a “Space Family”. And he was out cold as soon as he sat down, and jolting awake in a panic minutes later. To say that the others were surprised and terrified would be an understatement. He was lucky to have run away before the panic really set in.

Lance didn’t want to deal with the questioning, and he definitely didn’t want to bother the others. Shiro was more important and he’d died for much, much longer than Lance had. Lance didn’t matter and didn’t deserve their attention, he knew that all too well. 

There was a loud knock from outside that made Lance’s body jump a few feet. His breathing got even more shallow and his mind started to muddle.

“Lance!” Lance only heard that before his ears began to ring. Sweat was pouring off of him like rain. He felt his stomach knot and began to gag. The room began to spin slightly.

Lance tried to concentrate on his breathing- in 2, 3, out 2, 3, in 2, 3, out 2, 3. He bit back a sob as the ringing in his ears raised an octave or two and made his brain feel as though it was about to explode.

Lance hated that Allura had brought him back to life. He hated it more than anything else in his entire life. Allura should’ve just let him be so that he wouldn’t be tormented with the nightmares. The flashing red lights that burned his eyes, the repetitive alarm that could easily break a human’s eardrums, the hands that were consumed by the hottest of flames outstretching to take him away- probably the devil finally ready to take him because of his sins. Those visuals burned into his subconscious and turned him into a puddle of sweat and tears every time he fell asleep for just a few seconds. 

His attempts at steadying his breathing were abandoned as he threw up onto the floor. Red wasn’t gonna be too happy about that later and that just caused more of a panic to grow inside Lance. He was just being a nuisance to everybody. He was the ‘dumb one’ and he knew that from the very beginning. After that game show with Bob, it was confirmed. He was just dragging everyone down, he wasn’t the team’s sharpshooter, he wasn’t anything. And now he couldn’t even keep himself together for a few seconds and was constantly feeling self-pity!

Shiro didn’t feel any self-pity, Lance knew that for certain. Shiro was too strong to be wavered by his own problems. Shiro was dead for months, Lance was dead for minutes- yet who felt self-pity? Lance slammed the back of his head against the wall as he’d finally let all of his bile escape his system. The ringing subsided and Lance was able to hear the voice from outside of Red… Keith.

“Lance, let me in, please!” Keith called, obviously trying (but failing) to sound as nice and calm as he could. “Come on!”

Lance’s lips curved into a weak smile as he breathed heavily. Keith was a lot better of a leader than Lance could ever be. As if Lance would ever admit that was another matter altogether.

“Don’t worry about me,” Lance’s voice was more than raspy as he spoke. His throat had been abused to the brink of speaking being painful. “I’m fine.”

“You don’t sound fine,” Keith answered angrily.

“How do you know? As far as you know, I could be talking like this on purpose,” Lance chuckled weakly, his body not wishing to move even an inch. He let his eyes close for a split second, the burning hands of death too close to his face as he did, making his eyes jerk back open.

“Please let me in,” Keith’s voice was soft and pleading. 

“Why don’t you go check up on Shiro?” Lance sighed. “He has more for you to worry about than me. Stop worrying about such an insignificant character of this little story and let your troubles rest on someone much more important.”

“Lance, I…” Keith began.

“I’m fine,” Lance insisted before Keith could continue. “There’s no reason for little old me to be anything less.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments? Please? I'm ON MY KNEES (not seriously because my knees are shitty and that would be very painful)! Send me comments, PLEASE! Tell me your thoughts on the chapter, give me suggestions, share some of the highlights of your days (that's not supposed to be creepy, don't take it creepily, I'm not a creep), anything!
> 
> If I should've done something differently, write it in the comments. Please, please, please.
> 
> If you thought that this chapter was too short or any of my past chapters were too long, say so in the comments. Give me an idea of how big they should be and I'll do that to the best of my ability.
> 
> If you think that I'm being annoying with how long the Author's Notes are, I kinda agree with you. But I'm not gonna shorten the Notes until I get more comments! Mwahahaha!


	15. Trapped

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Suggestion: TechnoGhost  
> "Here's another suggestion (spoilers for season 7) in the last episode it's revealed that an altean was a power source for the robobeast, so lets put lance in that scenario. Lance gets captured by haggard druids,shiro is back in black and keith in red. The team keeps searching for lance but after a large amount of time has passed a new powerful robobeast shows up. The paladins don't know that lance is powering the robobeast until they slice down the middle miss lance by an inch. you can have switching pov, like lance seeing the team perfectly in sync with each other thinking that they don't need him anymore and how every attack hurts him too, then switch to the paladins thinking of different ways to defeat the beast while also wishing that lance was here to them support"
> 
> Summary:  
> Lance was gone for two years. Two years had gone by with Lance being tortured and ruined by Haggar. The others had left him during a mission, searched for as long as possible, but had to keep going. Now they find him in a robobeast, unconscious and bleeding out... and he looks... different... looks, Altean.
> 
> (There is technically Klance in this)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome back, my beautiful readers!
> 
> I was so excited to put out a new chapter! This one isn't my favorite thing ever but I'd like to think it's not my worst so... tell me what you think!
> 
> This is going to be a two-parter, don't you worry. 
> 
> TechnoGhost, I absolutely love your suggestions! You have such great ideas and I love that you're letting me try writing some. I hope that you enjoy this. I tried my absolute BEST to make it interesting. If you have any other suggestions, please share because they're amazing!

Lance POV

I smiled sadly as I watched the giant robot dodge me. How long had it been since I’d been gone? I don’t think I’ve been gone that long. They were doing great without me. Did they miss me as much as I missed them? Probably not. 

I felt conflicted. Do I feel happy or sad? Do I feel betrayed or proud? Should I be sobbing or smiling? What was the right response to the situation?

They’d replaced me. They were trying to kill me. They didn’t care about me. They hadn’t been looking for me, had they?

But they’d moved on. I wouldn’t want them to be unarmed and not ready for an attack just because they didn’t have me. They were saving the universe like they were supposed to. They were doing something that I wasn’t able to accomplish all the way through. I’m trying to kill them, not the other way around. It wasn’t their job to care about me, to begin with. It was nobody’s job, I shouldn’t hold a grudge for that. What was the point in looking for me anyway? I wasn’t important enough for them to get caught up looking for me. 

Pain erupted inside of me as my robobeast was hit again. 

It felt better than the torture that I’d been put through earlier at least. I didn’t have someone searching my brain and scrambling my feelings anymore, at least not that I could feel. I knew Haggar was still in there, controlling me, but I was numb to it now. It had felt like her hands were inside of my brain, moving things around and crushing other things that she felt wasn’t needed.

But none of that compared to the pain when she’d forced me to drink the potion, purple and bubbling. It burned all the way down until it eventually toured my entire body and concentrated solely on my cheeks, ears, eyes, and teeth. It felt like somebody had put a crowbar sitting above a fire for a few hours inside of each place. It was excruciating, more painful than anything I had ever felt before.

But that doesn’t matter. It never mattered really. What mattered was that I was now inside of a giant robobeast, fighting Voltron, fighting my team, fighting my family. I couldn’t talk to them and they couldn’t talk to me. And the only way for either of us to stop me was to kill me.

I tried to stop my own robobeast fist from colliding with Voltron’s face, it was on its way right where Shiro would be sitting. The attempt was fruitless, thank god Keith (or whoever was now piloting Red) was fast enough to intersect. Keith crushed Lance’s fist in his and if Lance was fully conscious, he would’ve screamed in pain. It hurt, it hurt really bad.

Pidge slammed Green against my face, while Allura used Blue’s thrusters to get a hard enough kick to my gut that some of my armor cracked and fell off.

For a moment, I lost all control completely. I threw Voltron completely over my shoulder and slammed them against the planet’s surface. I slammed them as far as I could get them, hundreds of feet below. Then I stopped.

This wasn’t what I was supposed to be doing. I had to get them to kill me, let them win. I couldn’t kill them, I had to fight.

I stood up and flew out- using my thrusters- of the giant hole I had created with Voltron.  For a moment, they didn’t move and I held myself back as best I could. I couldn’t let Haggar win, especially not now.

 

Shiro POV

I winced as I anticipated the punch that was coming right at me. It wouldn’t be the worst thing Black would have to sustain, but it’d hurt like hell no doubt. I sighed in relief when Keith stopped it just in time. It was only inches from me.

“Thanks, Keith,” I sighed in relief.

“Yeah,” Keith muttered. I shook my head sadly. Keith had been acting really distant since he got back. It was understandable due to the situation, but it was disappointing nonetheless. I mean, it wasn’t like Lance was all that important to the team anyways. It was actually a relief that he disappeared. Or at least that’s what I find myself thinking sometimes.

“I miss Lance,” Pidge grumbled as she hit the robobeast in the face with Green.

“I concur,” Allura agreed as she kneed the robobeast in the stomach. The hit looked to do a good deal of damage to the beast. The thick armor that covered it seemed to crumble quite a bit. For just a second, I thought maybe we were getting somewhere. Those thoughts were dashed in a second, however.

The robobeast grabbed Green and slung the entirety of Voltron completely over its shoulder, turning around in order to slam us into the ground. And damn, did that attack hurt like hell. The bumping of the ground as it caved under us sent me off of my seat in Black. The others sounded to be in similar predicaments as me.

“Everyone alright?” I coughed as I tried to make it back to my seat in order to pilot. Black was tilted to the side, meaning that one of the walls was now the floor. It felt like a lot of effort to make it where I wanted to go.

“I think so,” Keith groaned.

“Yeah, I’m good,” Hunk mumbled. He’d been even worse off than Keith after Lance went missing. It was one of the first times I had heard his voice since then. After nearly 2 years without Lance and practically without Hunk too, everyone’s morale had gotten kind of deflated.

“Same here,” Pidge grunted.

“I could be better, however, I am uninjured,” Allura informed with a pained grunt.

The robobeast just sat on top of us for a little bit, seemingly waiting for us to make a move. Then it pulled off of us completely.

“That’s weird,” Pidge muttered. “Why is it not attacking us?”

“Maybe it wants to enjoy killing us,” Keith offered.

“I doubt it,” I shook my head. We’d never once seen a robobeast do anything more than frantically try to kill us. Maybe this one didn’t actually have such intentions.

“I don’t think we should think about that right now,” Keith sighed. “Whether it wants to or not, it was trying to kill us. We can’t save it like this.”

“You’re right,” I answered simply. “Right now, all that matters is that we save ourselves and the people of this planet. If whatever is on that is hesitating, it should just turn tail and run.”

“But…” Pidge began but never finished. She seemed conflicted by the decision but unsure of what to say to fix it.

We all flew out of the hole we were dug into. Outside of the hole, we found something kind of strange. The robobeast had its fists coming towards me again, however this time it was different. It grabbed its own fist before it could hit, twirling around and falling on its ass for a minute.

Keith took the opportunity, slicing right through the robobeast, from its head down to its abdomen, right down the middle.

“Good job, Keith!” I cheered, but I was the only one. The others were silent. It made sense, I supposed. 

“I want to see what powered this,” Pidge grunted as she forced everyone back into individual Lions. Green let her down on the ground.

“Be careful, Pidge,” I sighed. “It might not be completely out of commission.”

“I’ll try my best,” she grunted. 

 

Pidge POV

Something wasn’t right. I couldn’t pinpoint what the problem was, but I knew there was one.

This was the first time any of us had ever seen a robobeast who did anything besides trying to kill them. I never once had the slightest suspicion that the robobeasts were just pure beasts until now.

But this one had practically surrendered to us. Even though it was about to hit us again, it purposefully swerved itself away from us. It could’ve gotten the perfect hit in, one that would’ve left us with an unconscious leader, probably. 

Was the robobeast this time, being controlled by someone who didn’t have the desire to kill them? Why would Haggar use an alien without pure murderous intents?

I used my jets to fly up to the robobeast’s head. I could hear the electricity inside of the beast’s body crackle. It was ominous in a way.

When I made it to the head, I scooted myself in through the slice that Keith had successfully made. I had to dodge a few electric volts thrown my way from random points inside the armor.

“Pidge, you’re taking a really long time,” Shiro called and I jumped. “Everything okay in there?”

“Wait a little longer,” I grunted, a little perturbed after getting scared shitless. “I haven’t made it to the power source yet.”

I crawled through, finally finding a use for my compact size. For once I didn’t feel so irritated by it.

“Come on, Pidge,” Shiro groaned. “I’m worried.”

“I don’t give a shit, Shiro,” I growled. “I’m a big girl, I can take care of myself. If you’re so worried about the paladins, you should not have left Lance behind during that mission.”

“Pidge!” Shiro yelled. “You know I didn’t have any other options.”

“You could’ve easily asked for backup,” I grunted as I got dangerously close to one of the holes exploding with electricity. “Hunk and I were nearby and we’d finished taking out our people. You could’ve stalled and called for one of us to come to help you.”

“Pidge,” Shiro sighed.

“You know what? What the fuck does it matter anyway? He was just a pain in the ass, right? He didn’t do anything for the team, right? He never was anything more than a nuisance, right?” Damn it, I was about to start crying. This wasn’t the time for this. “That’s what you’ve always thought about him, wasn’t it? Well, fuck you, Shiro. If he wasn’t important to the team, then I’m not. Then Hunk’s not. None of us matter to the team if Lance didn’t matter.”

For a moment, I was completely frozen. I stared at the power source of this robobeast, fear and surprise and joy all flowing through my mind. Was this just my mind playing tricks on me, or was this real? Was I really seeing who I thought I was seeing?

Tears consumed my vision as I stared. He was in a bad way, wasn’t he? He looked so different now too. Was it really him? He… 

“Lance!” I screamed out, wrapping my arms around him, even as he was purely unconscious. I sobbed as I hugged his limp body. “Oh my god, oh my god, what the hell happened to you?!” I sobbed. I pressed my ear to his chest, reminiscing in the faint heartbeat. He was alive. He was here. I was hugging him for the first time in 2 years. I would be able to apologize for all the hurtful comments I’d said before the start of that mission 2 years ago. I’d be able to see his smile and hear his laugh again. “We all missed you, you idiot!”

“Pidge, what’s going on?” Keith called. I had to control my sobbing a little in order to effectively speak.

“I-It’s Lance!” I gasped before sobbing more. “He’s still alive, guys! I found him!”

 

Keith POV

I was out of my Lion as soon as the words reached my ears. Lance? My Lance? He was alive, in that robobeast?

I jetted over and inside, sliding through the tiny crevices before stumbling upon Pidge hugging a limp body perched on a chair. Blood was piling up the floor underneath them. I hadn’t heard the protests of Shiro until I was inside.

“Keith, get back out here now! We don’t know if that actually is Lance! What if the robobeast isn’t actually dead? Come back now!” he called frantically.

“Shut up,” I muttered as I slowly walked towards Pidge. Pidge was covering up the person’s face, which meant I would have to probably pry her off in order to see if they’re really Lance. “Pidge, let me see.”

I was actually extremely surprised that she complied. Maybe she did because she knew how important Lance was to me. She knew about our relationship back when I’d been accepted as Black’s Paladin. And she knew that we had to separate when I went with the Blade. She knew everything about our relationship, she was our ultimate fangirl.

I stared at the bloodied face for a long time, trying to count all of the differences and similarities.

Similarities: skin tone, body and face shape, 1 inch long scar above his right eye from breaking a cup in the castle’s kitchen, 2 inch long scar just above his upper lip from an accident when he was a little kid, peaceful sleeping expression with a tilt on his lips, slight twitch in his left hand and right eye.

Differences: long white hair, baby blue crescent marks under his eyes, pointed ears, sharp teeth, a robotic replacement for his left eye, long deep scars all over his face and other body parts, prosthetic for his left leg and right arm.

So many differences, but unmistakable similarities. This was my Lance. 

My knees locked and I fell, tears swarming my usually dry eyes. I hadn’t cried once since I found out that Lance had been captured, not even when I was alone. The walls had eyes and ears, and they were snitches. I wouldn’t let myself cry. But now, now I couldn’t hold back. Lance was alive!

“Oh my god,” I whispered as I looked at him. He didn’t look any older than before, other than the long hair. His hair nearly reached his shoulders now.

Pidge was covered in Lance’s blood as she cried, now beside me.

“W-we need to get him out now!” I yelled, frantically trying and failing to pull myself up. My legs were too shaky to support me. “Shit, I can’t get up!”

“K-Keith, this is Lance, right?” Pidge whispered and I nodded. “H-He looks so different.” I nodded again, more tears clouding my vision.

“Keith, Pidge! Hurry up and get out of there!” Shiro roared through the coms. “I don’t care what’s powering that goddamn thing! It was trying to kill us and I don’t want to lose anyone else ever again!”

“We’ve got to help him,” I growled. “Hunk, Lance is here. We need you to help. He needs to be carried out.”

“How do you expect him to get in here?” Pidge grunted, already trying to pull Lance out of the chair. He seemed to be stuck completely onto the chair. “We could barely fit through the entrance.”

“Cut a bigger hole into the robobeast,” I sighed.

“Got it,” Hunk grunted and both Pidge and I smiled to each other. Hunk sounded so hopeful, for the first time in 2 years. This must have meant so much to him, after so long.

There was a loud explosion outside. Pidge and I both jumped as the unconscious body let out a blood-curdling scream, more blood seeping from his forehead. Another explosion brought another scream and another wound.

“Hunk! Hunk, stop, stop!” I screamed and the explosions stopped abruptly. I sighed when the screaming stopped. “It doesn’t seem like that’ll work too well either.”

“What happened?” Hunk asked. Pidge tried to pry him off again with no avail.

“It looks like anything we do to the robobeast directly affects Lance’s physical body. We’re gonna have to figure this out without you, Hunk. Allura, I’m sure you can fit through if you would try to help whatever way you can.”

“I would love to,” Allura’s first words since we’d found him were so sincere and happy that it brought a smile to my face. This was the first time that we all were acting like a team since I’d rejoined Voltron. Everyone’s moral had been completely drained when I’d joined and for the full two years, it was all the same. There were only blank faces and droopy eyes.

 

Allura POV

For a long time, I just stared in bewilderment at Lance’s appearance. Lance was… Altean? He had all of the traits- and more- of an Altean, an Altean prince even. His ears were pointier and longer, his hair pure white and his crescent marks were more directing towards his nose than his ears, sure signs of Altean royalty. It was a shock that momentarily took away any of my worries of the immense blood loss or absolute pain he seemed to be in.

“You can figure out a way to get him out, right?” Keith asked desperately. Both him and Pidge stared at me, tears and blood becoming a disgusting concoction on their faces. That’s when it finally hit me- Lance was really in bad shape.

There was blood seeping from all over him, although I couldn’t pinpoint any specific wounds. They were all in places covered by the seat he sat in. He was strapped in with arm and leg holds, as well as something covering his forehead. The chair was somehow keeping him there, either by sticking to him in some manner or something else entirely.

“I can think of something,” I answered. There was no other option… it was either we got him out or we'd die trying. I wasn’t going to give up and I knew the others wouldn’t be able to take leaving Lance behind again. “We’re not leaving him behind this time.”

Keith and Pidge nodded in agreement as they stepped out of the way.

I got a closer look, finding more proof of a purely royal Altean male. His sharp teeth were unmistakable. My father looked very similar in comparison to Lance now. He even had the small stubble that my father had in his teen years. 

I softly touched Lance’s flesh wrist, feeling a flow of strong, overpowering quintessence in the contact. If he woke up, he’d be able to pull himself out of this no problem… well, if he could endure the pain.

“Do you understand how much I missed you all?” I heard as I felt a strange connection I’d never felt before. It was oddly comforting and warm, but filled with much sorrow and loneliness. “I don’t wish for you to understand. I want you all to find happiness, even though I’m not around. I’m sure you did, and I’m glad.”

It took me a long time to realize whose voice I was hearing. What feeling was coursing through me. It had been too long without feeling Lance’s presence and hearing his voice. Although, I’m pretty sure that his voice had changed a lot in the last 2 years.

“Lance?” I thought. The thoughts that were being planted into me stopped abruptly. “We’re here for you, Lance. We need you to wake up and get yourself out of this chair. I am unable to do so, but you would be able to get out. Please wake up for us.”

“Why am I hearing you now?” Lance asked. “This is not how this is supposed to go.”

“Please wake up,” I repeated, a little more desperate. “I promise that you won’t regret it.”

I watched as Lance’s eyes fluttered open. There was even a slight creaking from the metal of his left eye. For a moment, he sat frozen in time, all of us waiting in fear and anticipation. Then he blinked, looking up at all three of us with a strange expression. I believe that Pidge had referred to it as “a child on Christmas day”, whatever that was supposed to mean.

“Hello again, Lance,” I sighed, smiling proudly at him. His right eye filled with tears as he stared, before ripping himself free of the chair in one foul swoop. It obviously hurt, but he didn’t care enough. He jumped into Keith’s outstretched arms, desperate for what he’d been missing for so long. He sobbed into Keith’s shoulder as Keith cried happily.

“You’re going to be ok,” Keith whispered as he kissed Lance’s pointed ear. Lance’s ear twitched slightly before he went limp in Keith’s arms.

There was a moment of panic in all of us before Keith felt Lance’s weak pulse and sighed in relief. We finally got our sharpshooter back after 2 years.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please give me comments. I'd love to hear your thoughts about the chapters.
> 
> If you enjoyed this chapter, please tell me so that I maybe can make more like it. If there are any suggestions for future chapters, I absolutely need them so don't even hesitate. I will post anything you ask, I promise! (Except for smut because no matter how hard I try, I cannot write that kind of thing well)
> 
> If there is anything that I did wrong that you'd like to point out, I don't mind. Send me hate comments if you want (they're actually extremely hilarious to me).


	16. Trapped Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The second (and final) part to the suggestion made by TechnoGhost-
> 
> "Here's another suggestion (spoilers for season 7) in the last episode it's revealed that an altean was a power source for the robobeast, so lets put lance in that scenario. Lance gets captured by haggard druids,shiro is back in black and keith in red. The team keeps searching for lance but after a large amount of time has passed a new powerful robobeast shows up. The paladins don't know that lance is powering the robobeast until they slice down the middle miss lance by an inch. you can have switching pov, like lance seeing the team perfectly in sync with each other thinking that they don't need him anymore and how every attack hurts him too, then switch to the paladins thinking of different ways to defeat the beast while also wishing that lance was here to them support"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's a little early for me to be updating, I know. For me, it's technically still Sunday (I'm not sure about any of you people's in different time zones). But, well, I finished this chapter a little earlier than I expected and felt obliged to put it up. Mostly because I'm gonna be SUPER busy tomorrow since I got a full day worth of school work I gotta do and lots and lots of work to do! AHHH, I'm gonna die!
> 
> Anyways, this is the end of this little story! I loved writing it and the suggestion was so fun to expand upon and use. Thank you, TechnoGhost, for the amazing suggestion!

Lance POV

I fell out of the healing pod, landing in Keith’s strong arms. At first, I thought it was Ezor or Zethrid after another match in the Galra pits. It was a pleasant surprise when Keith started stroking my hair and whispering “you’re okay. Everything’s going to be okay.”

I couldn’t tell whether it was reality or some bullshit my mind was pulling out of nowhere. Maybe it was all another of Haggar’s mind tricks and I’d find myself being murdered by one of my Voltron teammates again (like every mind trick she ever forced me into). No matter what it was, it didn’t matter.  Getting to feel Keith’s arms around me again was all I ever wanted, even if it was just a mind trick.

Tears flooded my vision. I grip onto his cropped jacket with all of my might, his warmth filling my cold body. Something happened while I was with Haggar that had made me feel as though I was constantly inside of a freezer. But Keith was as warm as he always was, warmer than I ever was, even before.

“It’ll be okay, Lance,” Keith whispered, stroking my lengthy hair gently. Although it was a gentle gesture and it was comforting, it also reminded me of all of the days Zethrid would grab my hair and drag me across the room. It wasn’t the best feeling to put it lightly.

“Lance!” there was a scream that I immediately recognized, but it also sent panic throughout my being. I said it didn’t matter if this was another of Haggar’s tricks... but that was a fucking lie. I’d rather die than deal with one of those again. I wanted to really truly be in Keith’s arms. I didn’t want to be alone anymore.

I curled into Keith’s stomach, tears streaming down my cheeks as I began panicking. I couldn’t take another wake up call, showing that I was still in the Galra ship. I didn’t want any more torture and false hopes and pit fights and experiments. I couldn’t take anymore.

“Shh, it’s ok, Lance,” Keith rubbed my back as I sobbed. “Everything’s ok. It was just Pidge. S-she’s so happy to have you back. We all are. We’ve missed you… so, so much.”

Keith choked on tears as he cradled me. His crying sounded so genuinely happy… could this be real? Really real? I… I couldn’t tell. I gripped harder onto his jacket, hoping that the soft fabric would show me the proof that this was reality. It didn’t, but the softness was a relief compared to the itchy rags I had been forced to wear all the time. Was it a relief… or just as uncomfortable? Everything was so confusing.

“My boy, you’ve finally awoken!” Coran cheered as he walked into the room. He didn’t seem all that surprised or worried about the fact I was sobbing on the floor. It made sense, most people would probably act the same way I guess. “Welcome back. We’ve all missed you, Lance.”

I lifted my head from where I’d embedded it into Keith’s stomach. A small smile tilted my lips as I saw the orange haired Altean, Pidge behind him with a look twisted with guilt and happiness on her face. Please, please… let this be real!

I opened my mouth, about to speak, but quickly snapped it closed. The smiles scattered on the faces in the room automatically flipped upside down. I noticed a soft nod from Coran as he forced another smile.

“You’ll be good as new in no time,” Coran said. The sentence was probably more to convince himself than me. But I put out a subtle nod, before attempting to get to my feet. The prosthetic that replaced my left leg was a lot more painful to use than one would expect. Each step ground the metal of the prosthetic deeper into the flesh of my hip. 

“Be careful,” Keith grunted as he jumped to his feet. He offered his hand, which I refused with a gentle shake of my head. I didn’t need nor did I want help. “Don’t push yourself.”

“Indeed. Pushing yourself will just create a worse problem,” Coran agreed. “Maybe accepting Keith’s help would be in your best interest.”

I frowned. Did I want that? I didn’t want him to think of me as a burden… like he did before he left for the Blade. He’d told me that he hated me, that he was tired of me. That if anyone should leave, it should be me. Or was that another of Haggar’s mind tricks? It all seemed to muddle together somehow. I shook my head a second time, a little more fervently this time. I didn’t want to hear him call me a burden again, even in a mind game. 

Coran nodded in understanding, clearing a path to one of the “operating tables”.

“What are you planning to do, Coran?” Keith asked, practically reading my mind. It hurt to admit but… I still couldn’t trust them completely. They all looked and acted like my real Voltron team, but there was no way to be sure. And until I found one, I had to keep my eyes peeled for any… problems.

I laid down on the table, the cold stone seeping through the unnoticeable fabric of the healing pod suits.

“Well, as of now, the best course of action would be to remove the prosthetics. Then allow him a few days of rest and relaxation before doing any of the more important operations,” Coran smiled down at me. I felt sweat already form on my brow. I understood what he was doing and why, but the angle of which I was looking at him… I didn’t like it. It was too similar to watching the “doctors” on the Galra ship.  “Don’t worry, Lance.”

“Yeah, and Hunk and I will be making you some much better prosthetics too. There’s nothing to worry about,” Pidge piped in cheerfully. Her voice was a little different than what I remembered. Deeper, I guess? But deeper in a girl way. That’s only if I was remembering correctly. Who’s really to tell? I didn’t even know how long I’d been gone. I just know Pidge’s and Keith’s hair were up in long ponytails. That was really the only sign of any time change.

“I’m just going to give you this little injection,” Coran muttered, not giving me even a second to react. I began to panic. Why did I panic? I’m not sure myself. Keith held me down as I thrashed around, in a complete frenzy. Then everything went black.

 

Coran POV

“Alright, you two, I’ve got this. You should go discuss with the others about the next mission,” I sighed as I played with a little of Lance’s long white hair in between my index finger and thumb. Pidge obediently left but Keith’s hand still rested in Lance’s. “Go on, Keith. I’ll call for you if anything happens.”

“But…” Keith sighed. “I don’t want to leave him again.”

“You can’t stay right next to him every tick, Keith. You must learn that now before things get difficult,” I grunted. I understood his feelings perfectly. I felt the same way. So did the others. We all felt the same way. We just got him back. But this was not the kind of thing Keith should witness, it’d just worry him more. “You can trust me, you know. He will be fine with me.”

“But… I left him all alone. I said such awful things. I thought I lost him forever, the last words he heard from me being such awful, hurtful words,” Keith’s eyes began to leak with fresh tears again. I nodded slightly, exhaling deeply. This was more pain than these poor Earthlings should have to experience. 

They all felt such guilt after Lance was abandoned. Not just because they didn’t help him, but because of the fact each person said something that they soon regretted. They each believed the last thing they’d ever get to say to him was something awful and hurtful. Lance didn’t hear anything positive from them that day, and they believed they’d never get their chances to apologize. 

I felt the same, having said some rude statements myself. Having brushed him off, as I was too busy to listen. Having said “I don’t have time right now, Lance. Go bother someone else.” I knew after I’d said it that it was offensive and shouldn’t have been said. But I brushed it off, saying I’d apologize to him when he got back from their mission. Just to find he wouldn’t.

A few tears fell from my eyes as I recalled.

“I understand,” I whispered. “But this isn’t the time for that. I can’t have you in here right now. He’ll be alright in my care, I promise.”

Keith whimpered, reluctantly sliding his hand away and dragging his feet to the door. “Tell me when I can take him to his room.”

“Of course, Keith,” I smiled sadly, nodding as I did. He walked out of the room, looking like he was heavier than he could even handle.

After a moment of just staring at the door, I looked down at Lance. My boy, my favorite Paladin, the boy who I felt was more of a son to me than any of the others. I couldn’t understand how he could look Altean. Altean royalty even. But I knew such a drastic change in his appearance could not have been painless. Probably one of the most painful experiences of all.

It saddened me to think of all that he had to go through. Trying to imagine what kind of torture he must’ve gone through, the horrible things that he had to endure. I couldn’t even imagine, but just trying made me want to gag.

I carefully started to unhook the different wires that connected the upper and lower part of his prosthetic arm together. There was much to do and I didn’t have the time to really think about this kind of thing. Lance, the way he is now, has a lot to fix before I’ll be able to relax.

 

Keith POV

I sat in the chair beside Lance’s bed, holding onto his hand with everything I had. It felt like if I did so much as let go, Lance would disappear and I’ll be back where everything started. I couldn’t live with the guilt anymore. I love Lance with everything I have and I wanted to remind him of that.

Coran had been able to remove all of the prosthetics, put into a healing pod in order to heal the wounds that were opened because of them, then asked me to take Lance to his room. Now I sat here, watching as he peacefully slept with only the regular twitching of his eye and hand showing that he was even alive. He was in full hibernation mode, I could tell.

I had really missed him. I knew already that the others missed him too and that everything I felt was also what they felt. But I really couldn’t leave him. It was too difficult. If I left him again, he could disappear. I don’t know if it’s necessarily that I don’t trust him to keep himself safe but that I don’t trust myself that this isn’t just some amazing dream.

Lance’s single stunning blue eye and other still purely Galra tech eye opened halfway,  the real one looking glazed over with exhaustion. He looked at me, wording my name as he did. Of course, the word didn’t go any farther than just the formation on his lips.

When we’d gotten him back to the castle and into a healing pod, Coran had done a scan for all the damage. There was a lot… a LOT of damage. One is the fact that his vocal chords had been ripped out. They’d been completely removed. I would never get to hear his laugh ever again, never hear his voice, never hear him say “I love you” ever again. Never hear him say my name. But I was ok with that, as long as he was here… here with me again.

“Hey, babe,” I whispered, mindful of a headache that Coran informed Lance was going to have when he woke up. Apparently, the injection Lance had gotten, the one that knocked him out had some lasting effects of fatigue and nausea and headaches. You’d think with how much tech the Alteans created, they could make some medical equipment that didn’t have side effects. “Do you want something to eat?”

He looked at me, a look of confusion written on his face. He’s forgotten that he was saved and back home, didn’t he?

“Don’t worry. You’re back home,” I smile as I slide my thumb over his hand. “You’re safe with me and the rest of Voltron and Coran again.”

His pale lips curled into a small smile. Those lips used to be full and red. But they were thin and white now. The smile I so adored didn’t look the same… but Lance was still the Lance I loved and I knew that. And even if his smile was different, it was still his beautiful smile that I would always adore.

“Are you hungry? Hunk has been working on something for you to eat,” I asked, still mindful to keep my voice a whisper. He’d been through enough without dealing with someone talking to him when he had a splitting headache. “I can go get it for you if you’d like.”

Lance’s hand gripped onto mine with strength I didn’t think he could have in this state. He shook his head slowly, mouthing the word “stay” as he did. But his stomach softly growled nonetheless.

“I’m not going to be gone for long,” I sighed as I got to my feet. His eyes opened widely, showing some tears slowly filling them. He shook his head desperately. “I’ll be right back, I promise.”

My heart ached as his eyes overflowed with tears. He’s been through so much that he doesn’t even want me to leave. Was it that he didn’t want me to leave or that he didn’t want to be alone? I couldn’t tell. But he had to get something to eat. Hunk was still in the middle of cooking, Pidge was working on the new prosthetics, Allura was working on mission plans, Coran was going over all of Lance’s medical information, and Shiro had expressed the fact he was too busy with something. What was I supposed to do?

“Lance, I promise I will be right back, ok?” I whispered and he let out a stifled sob, only barely heard. I ran out of the room as quickly as I could, running to the kitchen.

“Hunk, Lance needs something to eat,” I said as I ran through into the kitchen. Hunk jumped.

“Is he awake?” he asked with slight alarm. I nodded.

“He really didn’t want me to leave so I have to get back as soon as humanly possible,” I informed, bouncing up and down to show that I didn’t have much time. Hunk nodded, handing me an Altean equivalent to a mug, covered by some kind of lid. He also handed me something similar to a spoon. “Thanks, man!”

“I’ll be over when I’m done in here,” Hunk informed with a smile. It was nice to see his lips curved upwards like that after two years. “Now run like the wind.”

“See ya,” I laughed as I ran out of the kitchen and back to the room.

I walked into the room, breathing heavily out of exhaustion. When I did, I saw Lance curled up in the corner of the bed, sniffling and staring at me as if I was about to murder him. I mentally face palmed myself. Of course, that scared him shitless. Why wouldn’t it?!

“Hey,” I whispered as I softly tiptoed my way back over. As I got closer and he recognized me, some of the tension eased, but not a lot. “It’s ok,” I sighed. “I told you I’d be right back, didn’t I?”

He laid back down, seemingly exhausted. He looked at me, tears still coating his face. It tugged at my already broken heart.

“Hey, hey,” I whispered, rubbing my thumb over his cheek softly. His eye shut for a second, before reopening. He smiled softly, mouthing the words “thank you”. “Here, you should have something to eat.”

I pulled off the lid to the mug. Almost instantly, we were hit by the smell. It smelled like chicken noodle soup. It didn’t look like it by all means- the liquid being a purple color- but the smell was absolutely stunning. Lance inhaled deeply, smelling the aroma in all of its glory. His long, pointed ear twitched awkwardly. I smiled, feeling a sense of pure joy in the scene before me.

I scooped some of the strange soup with the spoon, holding it up to Lance’s mouth. He seemed skeptical at first, but after a minute, he drank it up desperately. 

He took about half of the soup before it began to creep its way back up. I guess that was a bit too much. 

I had already been prepared with a trash can, helping him sit up and holding the trash can as he threw everything back up. He sobbed as he did, obvious pain manifested in those sobs. It hurt to watch, while all I could do was rub his back and hold the trash can. 

The cycle repeated until I eventually found the amount in which he could consume. It was an alarmingly small amount, but I couldn’t do anything to change it. By the end, the mug was empty.

Hunk walked in as soon as I’d given Lance the last bite, hoping that he’d be able to stomach it. Lance heard the door and nearly threw up out of pure terror. I picked up the trash can, prepared for him to throw up again. But he just sobbed.

“It’s ok, baby,” I whispered soothingly, rubbing his back. “That’s just Hunk. He wanted to check up on you.”

Hunk looked guilty, saying “sorry.” He spoke in his normal tone, causing Lance to wince. I shushed him, putting my index finger over my mouth.

“Just a whisper, bud,” I whispered. Hunk looked confused for a moment before nodding.

“Sorry,” he whispered. I laughed softly, nodding him over.

“It’s ok, Lance,” I whispered. Lance looked up at me, smiled lightly and nodded. He reached his arm up, ordering one of Hunk’s signature hugs. Hunk looked to be in heaven as he gave Lance exactly what he’d wanted. Hunk began to cry into the hug while Lance just seemed to be in pure bliss.

 

Lance POV

I stared into the mirror, not even able to recognize myself. How were they able to recognize me when they found me? I poked the point to my ear, curious as to how it became like this. I was Altean? My hair was white? The scars were expected, but so many of them? I couldn’t even remember what any of them were from.

I already knew there was a weird robot thing on a little more than a quarter of my face, but I never would’ve imagined it to look like this! It was gray and purple, the purple kind of glowing.

“Have you not been able to see yourself until now?” Keith asked curiously. I shook my head. There weren’t many reflective surfaces that I could find in the Galran ship. Not that I really wanted any to begin with. I really looked like shit.

“Yeah, you’ve looked better, right?” Pidge teased and I smiled. I missed her. I missed them all. They were all I ever thought about while I was with Haggar. They were what kept me going. Although I still couldn’t stop thinking about all the insults they said before I got captured.

“Do you have any clue how you turned Altean?” Hunk asked. I shook my head, adding a one-sided shrug. One-sided since I still couldn’t move my right shoulder at all. Why? Because the damned prosthetic Pidge had made was too heavy and Coran couldn’t remove it yet. So I was stuck with the stupid prosthetic destroying my shoulder as it hung down helplessly at my side.

“Did Haggar like… turn you Altean somehow?” Pidge asked and I shrugged again. I mean, I was human before… wasn’t I? Who knows? I just knew that the long hair and stubble wasn’t my thing. It made me feel older than I was.

I made my hand into “scissors” with my index and middle fingers, motioning to snipping off my hair. The other three chuckled, Pidge nodding evilly.

“I agree,” Pidge grinned. “You need some serious work. But is now the time to worry about hair?”

“Why not?” Keith shrugged. “It’s not like Coran needs Lance to have long hair in order to do what he needs to. I think we’ll all feel a little better if Lance at least looks a little… more like Lance, I guess.”

Hunk bounced up and down excitedly.

“I’ll go get Allura!” Hunk cheered. “She’ll want to see this happen for sure!”

They all laughed, my laugh silent. It seemed to the others a little difficult to get used to my silent laugh. It took me a little while myself. It was kinda sad that now that I’m finally back, I can’t actually talk or laugh with them again. But I can’t be too sad since I am back and I am with them again. Gotta keep optimistic, right?

Hunk ran out of the bathroom, coming back only a few minutes later with an excited Allura. She already had some scissors… or the Altean equivalent to scissors (they’re basically the same thing).

“Ooh, I’m so excited!” Allura squealed, causing us all to laugh once again. I shook my head a little, adding a little eye roll. “I’ve been waiting for you to finally say that you wanted it all off.”

“He’s only been back for a week,” Keith chuckled. He patted my left shoulder, a soft smile on his face. I smiled back. I still wasn’t 100% sure this was real. But I just felt so safe and happy. So close enough.

“Yes,” Allura nodded. “That doesn’t change anything though.”

Everybody in the room sent their eyes rolling, some so big that it looked like they were about to pass out. It scared me for a split second, but only for a split second.

“Let’s send this hair away, shall we?” Allura asked as she patted my shoulders. I guess she was the one going to cut it. I nodded. Hair was never my favorite thing. I never got attached to it emotionally like some people *cough, cough* Keith *cough*. 

I used to cut my own hair, sometimes really badly, and it never really mattered all that much. People could look at my hair and think it looked bad and I wouldn’t even think twice. Although, I really did like the color of my hair. But that was gone so I just had to deal with it.

Allura grabbed a big tuft of my hair from the back and snipped it right off without even blinking. She cut it extremely close to my head, which meant that this cut was going to be shorter than any I’d ever had before. Obviously, I didn’t care but I just didn’t expect it.

“Wow, that’s a little short,” Pidge grunted, showing that she wasn’t quite expecting it either. “I guess your hairs gonna be super short for a while, dude.”

I smiled and shrugged.

“It’ll probably look fantastic,” Hunk laughed. “I think that white hair kind of suites you.”

“Definitely. Although I did like it the other way too,” Keith grasped onto my hand. I smiled brightly. I really missed this place. I squeezed Keith’s hand tightly.

It was a long process before Allura had finally felt satisfied. She’d actually shaved the sides and back of my head but had left the top of my head filled with hair. It was kind of one of those fuckboy haircuts that every guy had during my high school years. But I didn’t mind. It didn’t look all that bad.

“Well done, Allura,” Hunk praised. “He looks awesome.”

“Why, thank you, Hunk,” Allura beamed. “I believe he does too.”

I looked towards Keith and nearly lost my shit. He was still holding my hand, but his other hand attempted to cover his face. His face was a bright tomato color. I had only seen him blush a few times before that I could remember. He looked adorable!

“Shut up,” he muttered as he noticed me start to shake from laughter.

I shook my head. How was I supposed to shut up when I wasn’t even speaking?

If this was a mind trick, I never wanted it to end.

 

Allura POV

My jaw dropped. Wait… this couldn’t be… this couldn’t be real. Coran must’ve made a mistake! The castle must’ve made a mistake! It couldn’t…

“I don’t know, princess,” Coran sighed. “The castle has never been wrong before.”

“But…” I began, licking my lips. “How could he have lived long enough? Lance is too young to be… his son!”

“Your brother was a druid, in case you’ve forgotten, princess,” Coran grabbed my shoulder and squeezed it. “He learned at a young age how to use his quintessence to keep himself youthful for hundreds of thousands of years.”

“Then why would Lance keep this a secret?!” I screamed, tears forming in my eyes. “And why isn’t Allun with him?”

“Now that… I don’t know,” Coran shrugged. “Maybe we ought to go ask him.”

“Lance… he can’t be… he can’t be my nephew!” I cried with finality. If Allun wasn’t with Lance then either the castle was wrong or Allun was dead. Allun would never leave a family member to go fight a war without him. I just wanted to believe that the castle was old and still malfunctioning.

“Oh, hello, my boy,” Coran cheered as Keith pushed Lance into the room. Lance had been stuck in a wheelchair ever since he got back. Pidge still worked to make the perfect prosthetic for him, so he didn’t really have two legs to walk on.

Lance waved. I had to admit that haircut I gave him looked absolutely stunning! Although it didn’t hide any of the scars that littered his face and neck. And it didn’t do much justice to the robotic replacement on Lance’s face. Although I thought that that replacement actually looked rather… what’s the word… “cool”, I believe. 

“If you would be so kind,” I walked closer to the two boys. I grabbed Lance’s attention and he stared with a kind smile. “Do you know this person?”

I handed Lance the tablet I’d been staring at since I’d gotten the news. The picture on it showed my dear older brother. The similarities between him and Lance were unmistakable and I’d known that ever since I saw Lance for the first time, but I’d never imagined Allun would’ve conceived him.

He looked at it, confusion twisting his face. He shook his head, looking up at me with questioning in his eyes. 

“He kinda looks like you,” Keith muttered to Lance quizzically. I nodded in agreement.

“His name was Allun,” I sighed, looking at the picture with a fond smile. His smile was exactly like Lance’s. Allun had the most bright blue eyes, white hair and sweet smile. All similar to Lance. They even had a similar personality, as Allun was a pain but knew when things went too far. “He was my older brother. And the castle seems to believe he was your father, Lance.”

Lance’s eyes blew wide, confusion swimming in the beautiful ocean that they contained.

“However, it seems that the castle was mistaken. You don’t recognize him,” I said, turning around, ready to leave. I was satisfied knowing that Allun could still be alive. That was dashed in a moment when Lance grabbed my arm and I looked down to see that he seemed both puzzled but understanding. A pencil and paper had somehow been put into his lap while my back was turned. He scribbled in some words before showing me.

“Before I left for the Garrison on Earth, my dad and I got into a fight. I was on my way to storm out when he said, ‘You’re not even my son! I should’ve thrown you into the ocean without your mother knowing when you were a baby! You monster!’ I talked with my mom about it later and she said that my dad wasn’t my real dad and that she’d gotten married to him soon after I was born because she needed support from somebody. So I never knew who my real dad was.”

My jaw dropped again. No! NO! NO!!! I nearly screamed out loud. I couldn’t… he couldn’t… this couldn’t be happening!

“Oh… um, I see,” I answered as I nodded. “Well… it seems you are actually apart of my family.”

Lance looked slightly confused before giving me a smile. It wasn’t happy, more sympathetic. He seemed to realize that this wasn’t a good thing for me. That this meant that I probably wasn’t going to ever see my brother again.

He erased the long paragraph that he’d put on the paper, replacing it with just a few words. “I’m sorry for your loss.”

 

Lance POV

There was so much going on. So much that I had been remembering: some good things and some… some really horrible things that should’ve stayed forgotten. So much concerning my health (both mentally and physically). So many hugs and food and all sorts of things that I’d been sorely missing in the time frame that I was gone.

Finding out I’d been gone for 2 years was a shock that had left me… stunned and depressed for days. Finding out why I was now Altean (that I was actually a half breed and Allura’s nephew) was insane. I had been feeling so many emotions that I had forgotten how to feel. It was like a breath of fresh air.

Keith was there for me every step of this roller coaster of emotions. I felt kind of bad as he was by my side every tick. He had found out after trying to leave me alone to sleep one of the first few nights that… well, he couldn’t really do that. I woke up from a nightmare, still thinking I was in the nightmare and it was Keith’s job (as the one who slept in the room just left of mine) to calm me down. So I couldn’t even let him sleep.

It was really hard to get used to everything again. Anything I wore was irritating since I spent 2 years wearing stuff that scratched at my skin. Eating… well… food was difficult. All I had was a little bowl of some repulsive purple food goo that both smelled and tasted like all of the worst flavors in the bean boozled game. So obviously I didn’t eat that much when I was there. Which meant that my stomach decreased in size exponentially. Which meant that I couldn’t eat very much without throwing it all back up again.

But I was ok. I was home. Everything would be ok in the end. I had my family back, I had my boyfriend back. I didn’t have Shiro back since the Shiro who had been successfully avoiding me was far from the Space Dad that I came to adore. But what I had now… it was what I needed and what I so desperately wanted.

I was finally back. Shiro was still a clone, Allura was still my aunt, Haggar still messed with my mind sometimes, nightmares still plagued my sleep. I still couldn’t talk or walk or do pretty much anything. But that didn’t matter.

I was back home where I’d wanted to be for 2 years, and that’s all that mattered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please write in the comments what you thought! I love reading your guys' comments! It means so much to me to hear the positive opinions of my readers.
> 
> If there is any suggestion you might have, put it in the comments. I understand if your hesitant because I'm a shitty writer, but I'd really love to give your ideas a shot if you'd let me!
> 
> Any constructive criticism (or just plain hate mail if you really want to... but just if you REALLY want to)? Give it to me! I can take it! I actually REALLY need it (not the hate mail, although I'll accept it and maybe use it to my advantage because I'm a fucking genius... but not really)! I don't even know what I'm doing most of the time, so I'd love a little bit of help :3
> 
> Enjoy your week, my beautiful readers! I actually made this one end a little bit happier for once, I hope you're all proud. I'm not COMPLETELY a ball of depression this week! YAY!


	17. There's Nothing To Torture Past

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The backstory to Chapter 4, There's Nothing to Torture. (Read it again if you have to, but I don't think it's REALLY necessary. They're not really all that connected or anything)
> 
> Number 28 is part of an "ordinary orphanage" that no adult went into and no child who went in came out. All the doctors wanted was to create a natural weapon, an insane one. Number 28 is that child who finally grants them what they wanted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OH MY GOD! TWO CHAPTERS IN TWO DAYS?????!!!!! AAAAAAAHHHHH!
> 
> Ok, let me explain real quick. I was taking a break from my homework and was just looking through some of my scrapped fanfics. And guess what I found?! I don't even know how this got there! I'd made the whole thing but never put it up! I promised all you people that liked the first part to this, I promised a backstory, but I completely forgot about it! So I found it and now I'm putting it up.
> 
> Don't get your hopes up. I'm not doing the daily updates again. It's purely because I'm fucking stupid and felt the need to finally put up what I promised.

“Number 28,” Dr. Rodriguez called with a voice filled with ice. A small boy with long brown hair just farther than his shoulders and giant ocean blue eyes limped over to the terrifyingly tall man. Number 28 stood in front of the man, outstretching his hand. He knew what he was doing, he’d gone through this kind of thing more than enough times.

Dr. Rodriguez looked at him with a harsh expression, looking him up and down a few times. Then he stabbed the oversized needle deep into Number 28’s wrist, pouring the burning liquid into his veins. Number 28 whimpered softly at the burning sensation but tried his best to keep from showing any pain. He didn’t do that as well as he was supposed to.

When the liquid had all been injected, Number 28 got a cold glare from Dr. Rodriguez, as well as the two assistants behind him- Dr. Gonzalez and the only purely American one, Dr. Dalley. Number 28 felt a numbing fear as the three glared daggers at him. Then Dr. Rodriguez pushed him backward towards Dr. Gonzalez and Dr. Dalley.

The two angry men grabbed him and dragged him towards the back room. Number 28 knew that room far too well, as he was forced in there several times already. He would’ve screamed if he had the means to, but not only could he not but doing so would cause even more troubles for him.

He was thrown in the room, lying face down with a few other kids staring at him with wide terrified eyes. There would be a few more kids who would be thrown in before the injections were over and everything turned to hell.

Number 28 bit his lip in fear. The waiting was the worst, the looks from the others coming as a close second. Everyone had a look of pity on their faces when a new kid joined in the room. The pity quickly morphing back to fear for themselves. Number 28 wished to be able to talk with the others. Maybe they’d be able to calm themselves a little if given the opportunity to speak with one another. But the Doctors would get angry if they spoke even if they could- they didn’t want to hear anything from the kids ever.

A few of the kids looked a little younger than Number 28. Number 28 was only… five now? He didn’t quite remember as he didn’t remember when he was born and he didn’t have the means to know the date. All he knew was that it was the 28th day of some month… he thought. There were a few others that looked to be around four, mostly the newcomers. Number 28 was brought here when he was four too (he thought), so it wasn’t that surprising. The oldest the kids would get was about 9-10 if they were lucky, so Number 28 didn’t have much hope for anything more.

Number 28 scurried to one of the walls, burying himself in between a few of the bigger kids. They didn’t seem to care, actually seeming to close in a little more around him to make him feel more secure. Even with the lack of communication, the kids there were usually nice to each other.

One of them grabbed him and put him into a bear hug and he recognized that one in a flash. Number 3, one of the oldest of all the kids by now. She looked to be going through puberty by now, which meant that she might be able to survive long enough to escape. But Number 28 wasn’t too hopeful about it, and neither was Number 3. But she was the kindest of all of the kids, as she hugged and comforted all of the newcomers. She was there for all of the kids- she was the oldest after all.

Number 28 hugged her back with all of his strength, which he had a lot of by this point. When they weren’t getting the weekly injections or getting punished or sleeping or eating, they’d be working out. Weights, 5K’s, karate, sword fighting, shooting. Number 28 wasn’t sure what the Doctors wanted from them, but whatever it was didn’t matter by this point.

Another kid was thrown in- a kid much younger than Number 28. He looked to be the youngest that Number 28 had seen since coming here. Number 3 ran to him seconds later, running him to the wall opposite of Number 28. The punishment was gonna start soon, everyone who’d experienced it knew all too well. If anyone was in the middle of the room, they’d be dead in seconds. Number 3 was always there to save the last to be thrown in.

The room lit up a glowing blue, bright and painful. Even with his eyes shut tightly, Number 28 felt the light burn his retinas. He could hear the struggled gasps of other kids. Making noise just made it worse.

There was a loud noise, equal to a bomb exploding right next to his ears. His ears reacted with a painful ringing. A surge of electricity was sent through his tiny body, seeming to burn both his skin and everything inside of him. He could smell the burning of clothing and hair. There were more pained gasps, but fewer than before when some had found that it just hurt your throat to try and scream.

Everything stopped abruptly and Number 28 opened his eyes weakly. When he looked around, he found many had collapsed. Whether they were dead or not didn’t matter, as they’d be dead soon no matter what. The Doctors would take the kids who collapsed and those kids would never come back. When Number 28 scanned to find some similar faces, he found Number 3 in a heap on the floor, underneath the younger kid who she’d saved.

Number 28 felt his heart stop for a moment before he looked down at his feet. Number 3 was supposed to be the one to escape and save them. He shook his head sadly. She was so close.

The doors opened and all the kids who were still alive filed out of the room, all weak and shaky. Number 28 felt so depressed and alone as he left Number 3 in the room either dead or to die. One of the older kids put a shaky hand on his shoulder and gave him a small, weak smile. He smiled back.

 

Number 28 was… 12 or 13 now. He’d watched everyone older than him or who’d come in with him die already, so he was the oldest by default. And that meant absolutely nothing to him. He was still there and he was stuck there. 

He had the thought that maybe someone thought the same of him as he’d thought for Number 3 all those years ago. Maybe they were holding onto hope that he’d be the one to escape, to finally save them from the constant physical pains of their enslavement.

Number 28 wasn’t as hopeful. Hope was dead to him, just like his past memories and voice. He knew he wasn’t strong enough to destroy everything that kept them in that hell hole. Not only the three monstrous Doctors but also the guards always stationed in every room, the guns installed at the doors, the hellhounds outside and the electric fence that blocked them from any outside activities.

“Number 28,” Dr. Rodriguez called. When he saw Number 28, his usual coldstone glare deepened. After a few “incidences”, Number 28 had gained a reputation with the Doctors that they didn’t appreciate.

He held out an arm, waiting for Dr. Rodriguez to jab him with the syringe.

“Don’t try anything, funny boy,” Dr. Rodriguez growled as he grabbed Number 28’s arm harshly. He stabbed the syringe in extra far and poured the contents in mercilessly. Number 28 smiled dangerously, noticing that there was no longer a height difference between himself and the evil doctor. It felt like some kind of accomplishment, as he remembered very well how terrifying Dr. Rodriguez once was in all of his tall glory.

His arm wrapped around Dr. Rodriguez’ neck, pulling him close to himself. Number 28 snickered (the best that he could), forcing the syringe out of his arm and turning it on Dr. Rodriguez.

The assistance jumped onto him, trying to pull him off. But the daily weight training made his grip iron.

“We need some help here now!” Dr. Dalley screamed. Number 28 dug his foot into Dr. Dalley’s foot, earning an absolutely glorious scream. He grinned at the sound as it reached his ears.

He twisted the syringe around, finally pulling it out of Dr. Rodriguez’ grip. He quickly stabbed it into Dr. Gonzalez neck, pouring the rest of the contents into him. He roared beautifully and Number 28 felt like he was breathing a breath of fresh air. Dr. Gonzalez fell to the floor, obviously never feeling the effects of the strange burning liquid before. 

His foot collided with Dr. Rodriguez’ face, in a beautifully angled high kick that he’d been working on during the painful yoga-like workout. Dr. Rodriguez fell on his ass, too dizzy to regain his footing and Number 28 punched Dr. Dalley in the face, pushing him out of the rink for a time as well. The Doctors were pretty weak in comparison to the older kids, as those kids spent most of their time working out and training their bodies for just a situation as the one Number 28 had set up for himself.

Why had he done this? Wasn’t it already established that he didn’t have a hope of being the one to make it out first? Well, he didn’t give a shit about living or dying now. When hopes are gone, insanity reigns. And with insanity comes the stupid suicidal missions that brought up possible results. That’s what the Doctors had been counting on.

Number 28 grinned evilly as he stepped on the unconscious Dr. Gonzalez’ face. He stomped on it harshly, gaining a slight crunching noise underneath his barefoot after a few attempts. He breathed heavily, sighing in satisfaction at his accomplishment.

Finally, one of the guards decided to show up. They held a gun in their hand, preparing to fire while all the kids around cowered away. Number 28 smirked as he ran at the guard. The guard shot at him, but he dodged magnificently. After a few shots, it was proven that the attempts were futile.

He made it to the guard and twisted the gun out of his hands, similar to the technique he used to get the syringe. He quickly blasted the guard’s head sky high, reminiscing in the blood rain that became of the guy’s face. His long hair slicked out of its tight ponytail and fell into his face, bringing the slippery blood close to his nose and mouth. If he could, he’d be laughing like a maniac.

Dr. Dalley once again tried to stop Number 28 but was greeted by bullets. He screamed as one went straight through his leg, then through his crotch. Number 28 grinned wildly as he pushed the trigger a final time, shooting a hole through his forehead.

Dr. Rodriguez knew that Number 28 would successfully make it out now that he had a gun at his disposal. So he just stood shakily with his hands up in surrender, awaiting his own demise. And boy, did he get it!

Instead of shooting him right there, Number 28 walked up to him, a distorted giggle that physically hurt his throat was forced out of him. Number 28 finally felt in control, and it was like a breath of fresh air.

He grabbed a new syringe, also filled with the burning contents that he was supposed to have inside of him by now. Dr. Rodriguez had a sparkle of fear in his gray eyes as Number 28 continued to grin.

Dr. Rodriguez swung his fist towards Number 28, but the fist was caught in midair. Number 28 shook his head and stabbed the syringe through the bottom of Dr. Rodriguez’ mouth. It went straight through to into the roof of his mouth, and Dr. Rodriguez let out a struggled sob. Number 28 put his pointer finger to his lips, laughing as he pushed some of the contents out of the syringe slowly. Gaining some squirming and a gurgle from Dr. Rodriguez, Number 28 felt the obligation to continue. He pushed the rest of it out of the syringe and pulled the syringe out. Then he stabbed the syringe into Dr. Rodriguez’ forehead, straight through his skull and into his brain. Dr. Rodriguez’ eyes rolled to the back of his head, foam skyrocketing out of his mouth as he collapsed.

Number 28 danced around proudly, a few kids carefully shuffling. They were afraid that he’d attack them. Which was correct.

Number 28 didn’t leave anyone alive, not one person. He killed every kid, ever guard, every hellhound. The building became a pool of blood, and Number 28 was never seen again. The rumors of the town made it seem like he was murdering and stealing in the shadows where no one could find him, for years after the massacre occurred. But nobody really knew of what was happening inside the building, as it was just any normal orphanage… right? 

 

Lance took a bite of his popsicle as he stared at the television set, smiling slightly at the story being told. After 4 years, they still brought up that old story. Well, it made sense since it was the anniversary of the day the orphanage was destroyed. They still hadn’t figured out what was actually happening in that building before that kid killed everybody.

“Hey, Lance, get movin’ man! We gotta get ya to that school ‘fore it gets dark!” Marco called and Lance sighed. He pushed the off button on the remote, grabbing his back before he walked out of his room.

4 years living with the McClain family brought Lance a little bit of happiness. They didn’t know anything about him other than he was from Cuba. He’d never said his origins, his age, nor his last name. Well, he never said anything at all.

They’d played ‘guess the name’ with Lance for a few weeks before Lance had just rolled his eyes and nodded to whatever they’d said. That game had named him, but Lance sounded right to him anyways.

He took another bite of the popsicle, feeling relief in the cool snack slipping down his throat. He’d found that the more cold foods he ate, the less pain he felt when he tried to talk.

“Finally!” Marco growled, him and Veronica standing at the bottom of the stairs. Veronica glared at him with her arms crossed. “Paz, Savvy, we oughta go, kiddos!”

Paz was Rachel’s son while Savvy was Marco’s daughter. Rachel was out at work for the day and most of the night, so Paz was Veronica and Marco’s problem for the time being. 

“Goodbye, dear boy,” Victoria- the family’s sweet, kind mother- called. Their father, José, nodded with a gigantic, loving smile. Lance smiled back. “We’ll miss you. Be sure to call us often. And visit.” Lance nodded happily. He was happy to have enjoyed the comforts of a kind family.

Lance waved as he walked out of the house.

“Thank you,” he said in a dull whisper. It burned at his throat, but not nearly as bad as it used to. He smiled when he thought that he may someday be able to talk normally. Maybe he’d get a chance to get his memories back too. 

“Oh my god, Lance just spoke!” Paz screeched as he wrapped his arms around Lance’s legs, tripping him. He laughed as he laid on the ground, hugging onto Paz with dear life.

He might be a monster. He might have lost his voice, his memories, his hope, his sanity. He might have killed hundreds of people. But right then and there, he felt like a normal kid with a normal, happy family. And nothing felt better.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did you enjoy this? Please tell me if you did. And if you didn't. I just want comments, please. T-T
> 
> Sorry that I forgot to put this up earlier! I'm so dumb! All the work I've done to organize all of my work, and I ended up messing up so bad on this! Haha, I'm awful. 
> 
> Also, the next few weeks are probably gonna be my own works and not suggestions. Everything's been really crazy and I guess I didn't realize that I haven't written the next few suggestions yet. Wow, I'm just a mess! Either way, I apologize to all of my peoples who are waiting for me to get to their suggestions. I'm going to have to ask you to be a LITTLE more patient. The next few should be out before Christmas (or Hanukkah or whatever other holidays are in that time frame). Sorry, I only celebrate Christmas, I don't know about any of the other holidays really.


	18. Nobody Ever Knew Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lance's mom never was able to speak. Thanks to that she couldn't get herself a good paying job. So she became something that earned her Lance, earned her a family, and earned Lance a lot of bullying and shit from others.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone! I missed you all! I hope you all enjoyed my previous two chapters (even though there was only a single comment overall, honestly I'm very sad about that. But I forgive you because I'm just awesome like that ^-^). 
> 
> This chapter was just something that I threw together for no reason. It was just something I wrote a while ago out of boredom and it could easily be made into a 2 parter, so I decided to go with it.
> 
> If anybody really hates this chapter, put it in the comments and if there are more than... let's say... 2 people who despised it, I'll scrap the rest. Though the chapter will always stay on because I'm too lazy to click the few buttons it'd probably take to delete them (honestly I have no clue how you even delete them in the first place because I'm just that stupid XD)

When I was little, I was really shy. I know that people say that all the time- that they didn’t talk a lot- but I really was painfully shy. It made sense, due to the repetitive bullying that I went through because of my mom’s profession.

My mom was always desperate for any money she could get. She had her vocal cords removed when she was young, meaning she could barely make any noise at all. Nobody wanted to hire an immigrant who couldn't speak. Because of that desperation for money, after moving to America, she became a prostitute. That was the reason I was able to be brought into the world. One little mistake with no protection and she found out she was pregnant with me. She’d been forced to go back and live with my grandparents in Cuba after she'd found out about the pregnancy. Obviously, there were many reasons why that needed to happen: she couldn't continue her "job" with a kid inside of her so there was no way for her to make ends meet.

We went back to America when I was 7. She continued to pursue her occupation (a lot more carefully after the first "mistake"), just barely able to support both of us. I was “homeschooled” until I turned 9: when she finally got the money to pay for my schooling along with food, shelter, clothes, all that good stuff.

So many years in school (and even outside of school) went by where all I heard was offensive remarks directed at me and my mom. We lived in a pretty rural area- one where everybody knew each other- and of course, everybody knew about the local prostitute. Most of the kids knew about my mom’s occupation just as well as the adults, some going to her with the money of their own to... you know... (she would always refuse because having sex with minors is highly illegal).

I’d hear people say things from slut to whore to mistake to “if you were never born, things would’ve been so much easier for us and for your slut of a mother”. I’d watch mothers and fathers guide their children to the farthest side of the crosswalks, as far as they could be away from me as possible when I walked by. I’d see the uncomfortable stares of judgemental people. I’d notice the store clerks strange way of talking to me like I was an idiot when I tried to buy something- like I wasn’t aware of how poor I was.

Don’t get me wrong, I love my mother with everything I have. She is almost all I have and she did what she had to in order to provide for the two of us. I loved how she never judged me and always loved me. When I came out as bisexual at 12, she gave me a gigantic hug and smiled brightly, showing that she was proud of me. I would never think any of this was her fault in the slightest. I don’t blame anybody for the troubles that I went through as a kid and adolescent.

Anyhow, like I was saying, I was insanely shy. I didn’t talk like… at all. Anything I said would just bring on more teasing. Answering a question in class- I was cheating on someone else. Answering a question wrong in class- I was an idiot. Complimenting someone- I wanted to fuck them. Asking a question- I was an idiot and wasting everyone’s time with my stupid questions. Speaking at all- just an ugly whore bitch who was looking for attention.

I was always filled with anxiety whenever we got any of our assignments and tests back. If I got a bad score, I was stupid. If I got a good score, I was cheating. If I got an average score, I was average and wasteful. 

Nothing I did was good and no matter what I tried, that never changed.

The summer that I turned 13, I visited my abuelos in Cuba. They lived on the coast of one of the most beautiful, abandoned beaches Cuba had to offer. Their cabin was small and humble- no electronics or wifi, ugly uncomfortable furniture, moldy wood floors, and ceilings. With all of its faults brought more glorious personality. I absolutely loved that old, creaky cabin with its floors always covered in wet sand and walls furnished with my abuelo’s and abuela’s old surfing trophies and plaques from the 80’s.

That was what my childhood had consisted of. The old walls that would creak and tilt in the wind, the crashes of the wind that lulled me to sleep, the complete solitude from the outside world and all of its media, the warmth of three people who had such big hearts and minds- open to anything and everything.

I would spend hours sitting on the roof with my mom when I was little, staring out at the horizon and watch the sunrise. 

Even without her voice, my mom had an amazing personality. She loved and laughed and dreamed of better days for us. Better days where we wouldn’t be the topic of all the gossip and the shunned of the town. She was hands down the most amazing mother anyone could ask for, with or without the use of her speech.

One night as I sat on the roof, watching as the sun slowly hid behind the horizon, I heard my abuela call for me.

“Lance! Ven aqui chico!” she called. “Hurry up, por favor!”

Ever since I was little, my Abuela and Abuelo loved switching from English and Spanish at random. It was their way of teaching me both languages. It wasn’t the most effective strategy, but I learned so it wasn’t impossible. Even at 13, they continued to speak that way. I knew that they had created such a habit for themselves that it was impossible to change back to one single language.

“Si, abuela!” I called back. “One second!”

I waited until the sun was illuminating glorious pinks and oranges before I jumped off the roof and ran into the cabin with a smile. I loved to be somewhere that I felt safe to speak. That American thing that said all citizens had freedom of speech… that was bullshit, I have to admit. I had more freedom of speech in Cuba than I ever had in America.

“Abuela?” I asked as I walked through the door, hearing the familiar creaking that greeted every time the hinge of the door was moved farther than a 30-degree angle.

“La cocina,” she said as a hearty laugh escaped from her strong lungs. She was the kind of lady who wouldn’t be afraid to yell for hours to get what needed to be done done. Any time I misbehaved, she was the one to yell at me, and it wasn’t a pleasant experience to go through, let me just say. Her laugh was strong and came from her gut, but beautiful all at the same time. It filled people’s hearts with such joy when they heard it, and she laughed a lot. Her laugh could put an end to wars, it was so great.

“Si?” I asked as I sat on one of the wooden chairs, which were falling apart. Sitting on it created a loud crack sound that if I wasn’t expecting, would make me jump a foot.

“You have been going to school for a while, no?” she asked and I nodded. “Como esta?”

“Could be better,” I muttered. For a moment, there was silence. Then I got a karate chop to the head. I wailed dramatically and that magnificent laugh reached my ears.

“El trabajo de mama?” she asked. “Someone giving you grief?”

“Si,” I nod with a sigh, my voice soft.

“Speak up, chico,” she karate chopped me again. “You can only receive positive attention if you show positive attributes. Mi abuelo used to always tell me something. Listen up now. ‘M uestra tus verdaderos colores. No tengas miedo. Nadie le conocerá si no les muestra.’” (I used google translate so the translation’s probably off but what I tried to say was “Show your true colors. Don't be afraid. No one will know you if you don't show them.”)

That saying struck me like a lightning strike. It became somewhat of a philosophy of mine. I tuned out any insults and kept a smile on my face. 

Tragically, a few weeks after I went back to America, my mom and I got word that the small cabin on the beach- the one I cherished and loved- had been burnt down with my abuelos inside. Neither of my abuelos had survived. So my mom became my only family, my everything.

However, my philosophy- abuela's saying that she'd so graciously shared with me- was there even after they were gone. Even as I watched their empty coffins get buried side-by-side. Even with all of the fights and battles against self-harm that I went through. I wasn’t going to let myself be pushed aside anymore.

15-years-old, I got into a particularly rough fight. It had just been a few assholes circling around and pushing me around, laughing at me and calling me names. It was the pretty cliche "let's gang up on the little scrawny boy" scenario. I didn’t pay any mind, which just ticked them off apparently.

“Oh, just ignore us, huh?” the “gang leader” laughed. “Think you’re so tough? What, mama fuck you a few times to keep you in check? Now you think that you can take it?”

“You sure you’re not mixing up the stories?” I grunted as he pushed me against some of the people behind me. Those people pushed me back. The grin on his face morphed into an angry scowl. He glared as he grabbed my neck.

“Who the fuck do you think you are?” he growled.

“Oh? Did I hit the mark? Mommy a little too slutty to keep her grubby hands off her man-whore of a son?” I spit, laughing slightly as he tightened his grip. 

“Whose mom are you calling a slut, motherfucker?” he growled, bringing my face closer to his own.

“Oooh, you a fag, too?” I laughed. “I’d rather not have your nasty, dry lips touching mine. Are mommy’s lips as dry and thin as yours? I’m sure you’d know.”

That's the exact moment- the moment I vividly remember- that I went too far. When I'd finally pushed him to his breaking point. I knew I was getting there, and when a fist connected with my face, it made me feel happy. This meant I was showing my true colors. I wasn’t trying to have people like me, I was there to be who I was and nothing more. It filled me with pride with that first punch. Well, just the first punch, the only punch. The next thing I knew, the fist had turned into a serrated knife.

The scar stayed no matter how hard I tried to hide it, long and thin across my right cheek, just barely missing my eye on its path down my face. But when I saw it for the first time, all I felt was the pride... the pride that I was able to show someone exactly who I was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There is going to be another part of this (like I said), depending on whether or not you all like it.
> 
> If I have anybody who can speak Spanish reading this, please, please, PLEASE don't hate me! I did use google translate for most of the Spanish stuff. I know it's probably wrong. I'm not a Spanish speaker and I only took two years of Spanish with two REALLY horrible teachers. If you would like to write in the comments some actual accurate translations, I'd really appreciate it.
> 
> Bilinguals, I know that's not actually what you do. You don't switch from English to Spanish at random usually. I know this. That's why I put the explanation that his grandparents taught him that way. Obviously not a good strategy, I'm fully aware.
> 
> Tell me your thoughts in the comments, please.


	19. I Promised

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Keith made a promise to Lance. One that he found he couldn't keep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This isn't the second part of the previous chapter. Sorry, I promised a second part but I haven't gotten the chance to write it yet. It'll come out soon, I promise. I'd say sometime next week or so. 
> 
> I hope you enjoy this chapter, even if it's not what I promised.

“I’ve been thinking a lot lately,” Lance sighed as he stood, fists clenched in front of me. He looked to be in so much mental agony. It was surprising, Lance never came to me with this kind of stuff, not even in the few months that we were together. I’d go to him with all sorts of thoughts, yet I’d never even gotten a glimpse of this side of Lance.

“Oh? What have you been thinking about?” I tried to sound calm, even though I was terrified. If Lance was acting like this, whatever he was thinking about was really serious. For a moment, Lance clenched and unclenched his fists with a sort of uncertainty on what to do. He let his head fall and his bangs hid his face.

“Nevermind,” he sighed. “I don’t really know what I wanted to say.” He turned to leave and I grabbed his hand. He looked at me, tears streaking down his face. This was the first time I’d seen such a desperately sad, tear covered face on my boyfriend… ever. My eyes widened, purely surprised. He didn’t even look the same, his eyes were more vibrantly colored and shiny and his usually curved up lips were in a straight line. But I couldn’t help feeling that he was absolutely gorgeous, almost as much as he was when he was happy.

“Come on, babe. Talk to me, please,” I whispered, pulling him towards me and wrapping my arms around him. I felt my eyes start to tear up as the fabric on my shoulder started to dampen. Lance fell to his knees and clutched at the back of my jacket with desperate hands.

“My family… they think I’m dead. They don’t even know where I am and what I’ve been doing. They might never know. What are they thinking? Keith… I don’t want them to think that I’m dead. I don’t want them to be sad because of me,” Lance sobbed into my shoulder and all I could do was hug him. A few tears slipped from my eyes as I listened to my boyfriend.

“I’ll bring you back to them,” I whispered into his ear when he’d stopped ranting. I gave him a soft kiss to his cheek, then his ear, then his neck. “I will, I promise.”

He pulled away from me, a small curve upwards to his lips. It was such a soft and beautiful smile, I felt this overwhelming love that meant everything to me. He leaned closer to me and connected our lips into a short but sweet kiss.

“Thank you, Keith,” he whispered. I nodded and connected our lips again, this time longer and much more passionate.

 

Haggar was in front of me, a devilish grin on her ugly purple face. I glared at her with everything I had, as she charged up the magic ball or whatever. There was not much I could do to save myself- my bayard had been flung across the room and my leg got hit by an extremely painful bullet. All I could do was hope that everybody was right about my glare being a killer. 

Her magic ball was fully charged and was about to be flung at me when someone intersected at the last minute. I stared in utter shock and sorrow. No, no, nononononono, oh god NO!

“LANCE!” I screamed as the lanky boy with blue armor fell in a heap on the floor. Tears were already falling down my face as I stared at the pile of limbs. Haggar had disappeared suddenly after he’d landed. “No, no, no, baby. Come on, please. Get up, baby, please, I need you,” I sobbed as I cradled him in my arms. “Please, please, please, wake up. I can’t do this without you, I need you. I love you so much, you can’t do this to me!”

His eyes opened halfway, the usual glow in his beautiful blues dimmed. He gave me an extremely weak smirk that wrenched at my heartstrings.

“Love you… too babe,” he answered in a soft whisper. I shook my head and let out a short-lived laugh. “Will you… tell my family… that I was alive?” My eyes widened as more tears fell.

“What are you talking about? You’ll tell them yourself. You’ll run into your family’s arms and you’ll say something like ‘I gotcha! You thought I was dead, didn’t you? You can’t get rid of me that easily!’ And you’ll all be sobbing like babies while I stand in the corner waiting to be introduced,” I shook my head, trying to stop some of the sobs with no avail. 

“Keith…” Lance groaned out as his eyes closed completely. “Be careful out there without me.” He let one last exhale escape and my entire existence felt like it was crashing down on me. If there is a God, he must fucking hate me as if I were the devil himself! For a moment, I couldn’t process what had happened. It felt like everything had frozen, just like Lance’s lungs.

“No! No, Lance, no! Breathe, baby! I promised I’d bring you back! I promised! You can’t die here! Please, baby, please! I can’t live without you!” I screamed, now getting responses from the other members of the team. Haggar had used some weird magic to cut off communications while she was there, but it was gone now, I suppose.

“Keith, what’s going on?!” Shiro screamed, but I didn’t pay attention to him. It felt like nothing else was left in this world besides the limp body of my lover.

“L-LANCE, YOU FUCKING IDIOT! WHAT THE FUCK WERE YOU THINKING?! IF THIS IS SOME SICK JOKE, I DON’T APPRECIATE IT! WAKE UP NOW!” I roared so loudly that it hurt my throat. I sobbed harder when there was no response. I let my head fall to Lance’s chest in utter defeat. His soft heartbeat- the one I lulled myself to sleep with its soft rhythm- was gone. “Please, baby, for me. I need you, I don’t want to lose you.”

Once again, there was no answer from the person I loved most in the world. I lifted my head weakly, pulling his and my helmets off. I gave him a departing kiss, filled with pure sadness. His usually warm lips were cold to the touch, no sign of the excessive amount of chapstick he'd always apply them. His usual aggressiveness that would turn a soft kiss into a passionate one wasn’t there either. It felt almost hollow to kiss him now.

“I need you. Please come back to me,” I whispered, but there wasn’t an answer. Of course not. This wasn’t some fairy tale movie where everything ends all sunshine and rainbows. This was reality, where people died and people were left behind. I couldn’t just request Lance to come back, that’s not how the real world works. 

I wiped at my wet eyes and put my helmet back on. There was a lot of commotion through the coms.

“Keith, what’s going on?!”

“Answer us, Keith!”

“Guys,” I called, my voice soft and raw. Everyone went silent. “Lance is gone,” I whimpered as I said it, my head feeling as though it’ll explode from all the emotions. “I’m gonna take his body with me so that Haggar doesn’t get ahold of it and do something horrible to him.”

“Keith…” Shiro sighed with so much emotion and I had to keep from sobbing.

“No time to mourn, we’re in the middle of a mission,” I cut him off before he could say anything. It wasn’t the time for self-pity and I knew that all too well. I could mourn later. I stood up with shaky legs and dragged Lance’s body to Red.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I might be going on a form of hiatus for the holidays soon. Things have been getting really insane, and Christmas is coming up and I'm gonna have to deal with a lot. It won't be a normal hiatus. More that if I find time to write, I'll write and update, but I won't be updating every Monday (probably not even every week). But we'll have to see on that. I'll inform you all of that when it gets to that.
> 
> Send me comments, please.


	20. This was a Mistake

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lance gets captured by Lotor and he tries to force his way out of dying immediately. It doesn't work the way he wanted it to.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I totally forgot this was Monday! Whoops, I nearly missed a day. Sorry!
> 
> There are some trigger warnings. There is implied rape/non-con. I couldn't actually put it in there because of personal reasons and because I'm really bad with writing sex scenes.
> 
> Lotor x Lance is kind of a thing... but not really since Lance isn't REALLY into it... though Lotor is so I don't know.

“You know what? I’ve been thinking about it a lot and your ideals are so much better than Voltron,” Lance said with a nervous smile. He knew what he had to do but doing it was a lot more difficult than he thought he could handle. “Voltron is always ‘defeat Zarkon’, ‘fight the Galra’, ‘save the universe, blah, blah, blah. We rarely ever have any solid plans and nobody has the skills to think ahead, think what the enemy might do.

“I’ve had this growing thought now that Zarkon is gone and you- Lotor- are in control, that it’d be better for Voltron to surrender to you. I was the only one who thought that, obviously, but I think I can do something even better. I’m here now and I can be of service to you any way you desire. I’m willing to serve the Galra in the quest of conquering the universe.”

Lotor smirked wickedly as he watched Lance squirm underneath him, a beg showing in his majestic blue eyes.

“What a coward you are, little Blue,” Lotor chuckled. Lance shook his head.

“I’m just smart enough to know who the winning side is,” Lance grunted.

“Smart, you say?” Lotor questioned with a thoughtful look. “Is that what you Earthlings call it?”

“Well, Earthlings wouldn’t call me smart but sometimes I have my moments,” Lance put on his best fake smirk and let out a cocky laugh. 

“Earthlings do not matter,” Lotor waved away the topic. “What matters is that at this moment, you are informing me of your desire to betray your team.”

“I wouldn’t call it betraying,” Lance muttered. “I’d say it’s more… setting example for the others to give up.”

Lotor laughed. It was an awfully wicked laugh. “You are a very good actor, little Blue, I must admit,” Lance’s face twisted into a frown, but he kept all of the panic out of his facial expressions. “And as a reward for the magnificent show I just had the opportunity of being apart of, I shall grant you your wish to become apart of the Galran troops.”

Lotor walked closer to Lance, intertwining his ugly purple fingers into Lance’s brown locks. He pulled Lance’s hair so that Lance was looking up at him from his spot on the floor. “But I mustn’t allow such a vile creature such as yourself to be allowed into my troops without a little… modifications.”

Lance finally let some of his fear slip to the surface of his facial features. He stared into the yellow tinted eyes of his captor. Lotor continued to smirk as Haggar poofed into the room.

“We have a little half breed Altean that needs to be taught, hag,” Lotor hissed as he threw Lance’s head towards Haggar. Haggar nodded slowly.

“Why must you play with half breeds so much, Prince Lotor?” she hissed. “Especially ones with half of a useless species. I thought that you were smarter than your father.”

“I am, you filthy, filthy hag!” Lotor roared. “Just do as I say!”

“Yes, Prince Lotor,” Haggar grumbled as she slid her bony fingers down Lance’s cheek.

Lance felt a burning sensation throughout his entire body. It felt as though a flame had ignited inside of his body and was scorching him from the inside out. He held back pained screams as the flame continued to burn even after Haggar had moved her hands away.

“Paladin of the Blue Lion, you shall obey your orders from Prince Lotor even until death. You mustn’t speak of this encounter or anything that has happened to you this day to anyone. You will no longer be a Paladin of Voltron and you never were. You shall be Prince Lotor’s slave for the whole of your life. Begin your new life, Slave, and throw away your old one.”

Lance screamed out loud as it felt like a sword going straight through his head. The burning in his body hadn’t dissipated either. After what felt like an eternity, the pain stopped and he forced his eyes open again.

“Strip,” Lance heard and it felt like the world froze. 

“Yes, sir,” he said robotically. Apparently, someone had taken off his restraints somewhere along the way, so he was able to slowly, shakily begin taking off his clothes.

First was his gloves and boots, then his leg and arm armor, then his chest plate, then his undersuit. During the entire process, he would think “No! No! Stop! This isn’t what you’re supposed to do! Stop doing this! Put your armor back on! You’re exposing yourself, stop it now!” But his body ignored all of his protests until even the last piece of clothing was removed. Now there he stood, completely exposed, now able to move his body once more, but unable to force himself to put his clothes back on.

“Well done, boy,” Lotor grinned as he patted Lance’s head. When Lance heard Lotor and realized that he was there, out of reflex and embarrassment, Lance covered up his more private body parts with his hands. There was a low chuckle that resonated around the room. “Oh, no need to be embarrassed, dear boy, you look absolutely stunning.”

Lance felt like he was going to vomit when he had gotten the compliment. He’d just gotten a compliment from a disgusting monster of a man, how else was he supposed to feel?

Lotor got even closer until their faces were only maybe 2 inches apart. Lance looked into Lotor’s eyes with fear. He absolutely hated this man.

“Move your hands,” Lotor ordered as he trailed his long, ragged pointer finger down Lance’s bare stomach. Lance tried with all of his might to stop himself, but no matter his efforts, his hands went limp at his sides, leaving him 100% exposed with nothing he could do to change it.

Lance made a pathetic whimper, like a little puppy. What else was he supposed to do?  All he was trying to do was help the team and not die quickly. He knew that if he got on Lotor’s good side, he’d be able to get information on the enemy and contact the others. But Lotor was too smart- he could see through Lance’s acting too easily.

“Oh, my dear boy, don’t act like that. This is gonna be a regular occurrence for the both of us now,” he paused as he got even closer so that their lips were just brushing against each other. Lance wished to push away, but he couldn’t move. “Tell me honestly… are you a virgin?”

Suddenly, without Lance’s permission, he answered with a firm “no”. If he was in control, he’d have said yes. That could’ve let Lotor go a little easier on him.

“Oh? And who was your first?” Lotor asked as he lightly dug his nails into Lance’s shoulder. It wasn’t particularly painful, but definitely not comfortable in any sense of the word.

“Keith Kogane,” Lance answered, once again without his own permission. Neither Lance nor Keith ever discussed their affairs with anyone, nobody at all. Not even the others in Voltron were told about their relationship. Now Lance was being forced to say it… to Lotor of all people.

“Surprise, surprise,” Lotor muttered as he dug his nails deeper. Lance groaned, blood trickling down his front from the five small wounds being created. His other hand slightly tilted Lance’s jaw up, before pressing a forced kiss against Lance’s lips. Lance tried to move away, whimpering like the little puppy he was. “Kiss me, little dog.”

Lance’s eyes filled with tears, his mind so fervently disagreeing with what he was being forced to do. He closed his eyes harshly, a few stray tears falling.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the first chapter of a possible series that I'm gonna be doing outside of these Langst One-Shots. I've really been enjoying writing this, so I'll probably be writing more of this. I hope you all enjoy.
> 
> Comment whether I should indeed continue this, even though it won't be in this series of stories.


	21. Chapter 21

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "everyone in the world is born with wings. the more bad things you do, the darker your wings become, and vice versa. for example, if you rob a bank and murder a person in the vicinity, then your feathers will start turning black. if you save a person from dying or protect someone, your feathers will start turning white. your feathers only change colors in very extreme situations. to have solid black or solid white wings is unheard of: solid white wings would be revered as the perfect person, and solid black wings would be like the devil incarnate.  
> lance has chosen to never show his wings in public."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was a post I found on tumblr and I absolutely loved it, so I decided to start writing my own take on it.

I smiled fondly up at my teammates. They all seemed to be having a great time flying together as a cast (or flock depending on the social status and strength you are).

Earthlings, such as me, evolved from birds. So with that in mind, all Earthlings have wings. There is a good majority of alien species that are similar to us in that respect, although we’re unique concerning our wings. Our wings can only be black and white.

(Most) everybody is born with pure white wings. In the span of only seconds after being birthed into the world, the color darkens. The feathers at the very bottom, they start turning black. You can’t have purely white wings for very long. That’s because nobody is perfect, no matter how hard they try. White equals good, black equals bad. Anything inconvenient or bad thing that you do turns more of your feathers black. 

From annoying your mom with your first baby cry to murdering someone darkens some feathers. Obviously, depending on the scale of the bad thing, you could have more or fewer feathers darkened. But you can also do good things to bring white feathers back.

Most Earthlings have their wings about halfway, maybe a little more, of their feathers stained black. There are those few, like Hunk, who have less stained feathers than white ones. But that’s mostly because Hunk is a precious angel (everyone agrees with me).

Why am I, the amazing Lance McClain, not up there flying with my Voltron crew? Why, instead of racing with Keith and bumping into people like an idiot, do I stand securely on the ground while everyone else strengthens their bonds with each other just above me? Well, that’s because I don’t show off my wings. I do have them, just like everyone else, but I don’t show them.

You see, us Earthlings aren’t supposed to be able to have solid colored wings. Having solid white wings meant you were basically a God who never makes any mistakes. And having black wings meant that you were… actually the devil. Anyone with pure white wings would be praised as a God and anyone with pure black wings… well, if they weren’t the devil they sure as Hell wouldn’t live long enough to explain that.

Nobody is supposed to be ashamed of their wing color. But if you had solid colors, you better hide that shit from everybody because not even your parents will be trustworthy enough. 

And that’s why, ladies and gents, I don’t show mine. Solid colored wings are unheard of to the citizens of Earth. And my wings… they’re definitely what you’d call “solid”. Although they're two different colors, it counts. Left=black, right=white. I don't know what that means, but it definitely isn't something to share with the world.

So instead of showing them similar to everyone else, I use the nifty little ability that comes with every Earthling. The ability to fold your wings into the skin covering your back. It’s not the most convenient thing ever, as a small flinch of the wing could cause a world of hurt throughout the entirety of ones back. If you move your wings too much when they’re back there, it’ll end with that skin hiding them ripped to pieces. Another problem being the discomfort of not moving your wings. It’s like not using your legs for days, giving you a constant ache, but amplified because these are your wings! Wings equal the most important body part equals the worst fucking pain ever.

So here I always am, standing alone on the ground as the Voltron crew messes around up in the sky. And don’t think that Coran and Allura are able to keep me company, because they have their own wings too. Of course, Altean’s wings are different from ours.

Altean’s wings were scaly, kind of like what I’d imagine a dragon to be like. Coran’s were orange, matching his hair and mustache. Allura’s were bright pink, like her mother’s before her. Their’s were solid colors, but that’s because they were a totally different species from humans.

Depending on the planet we were on, I’d mess around in the water or play with the kids in nearby villages or something. But this planet was a barren wasteland with only rotting sticks and bright red dirt to play with. And, not to complain or anything, the suns- one a bright orange and the other a painful PAINFUL white (like a Godly white kind of bright)- made this place really hot and almost unbearable to deal with.

“Lance, my boy, come join us! We’re going to do a lap around the planet!” Coran yelled, waving me over. I sighed… when will they learn that it really will never happen? It would be a disaster if I fucked up and showed what my wings looked like!

“No, you guys go on without me,” I called back, waving him away. “I’m good down here!”

I’d created a… what’s the word… I guess “lie” is the best word to use… that I was just afraid of heights. Kind of a weird phobia to have when you live in a society almost completely built on heights. But it’s actually a very common phobia on Earth, so it worked out alright. After I told them, they didn’t push me to come with them on their “outings”.

So Coran just pouted and flew away, catching up with the others. I sighed, waving as they all flew away to enjoy each others company. While I sat in the dirt and dug at nothing in particular with the rotten and burnt sticks that I can’t even imagine where they came from. There literally are NO trees or bushes or plants of any kind, so where the Hell did those sticks come from?!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is REALLY short, I know! I looked through it and decided (because I haven't finished it all the way) that I need to make this into a two-parter. I would've chosen a different story, but I couldn't find any finished ones. I hope you can forgive me for this week. I've been having a lot going on and it's a little insane.
> 
> I may or may not be updating next week. Since Thanksgiving is this week, I'm gonna have to deal with the family and family and sitting at a desk writing and working does NOT go together. But we'll see on that. I'll update if I can and if I can't, I hope you'll all forgive me.


	22. Not a Chapter Sorry

Hey, everyone!

I've got to take a hiatus for a while. It's the time of the holidays, which means there's way too much going on.

I'll be working on all of the suggestions and everything during this hiatus, as well as all of my other writing project. I want to just kind of catch up with myself so that I don't have to scramble everything together at the last minute. As of late, I've been getting the chapters done by either Sunday night or Monday morning, not during the week like I'd been trying to do.

I hope you all can understand and be patient with this. I'll be back by mid-January sometime, I promise. And I'll be back with as much done as possible, including all of your suggestions! 


	23. The Dumb One

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Suggestion: TechnoGhost  
> "here's another suggestion when lance feels like he's not meant to be a paladin, he suddenly returns to garfle warfle snick. After bob plays with him for a bit, he tells the real reason lance is dumb is because he keeps hiding his feelings and self doubt from the group. ( i kinda imagine as being wise while also being funny)"

“Welcome to another game of Garfle Warfle Snick!!” the lights flickered on one at a time. Lance’s blood ran cold as he saw Bob sitting in his floating multi-colored seat. What? He was… why was he here again? He’d made it through the game already. “Let’s hear it for our first ever second time contestant, the Red Paladin of Voltron, Lance McClain!”

“W-what am I doing here?” Lance asked, stuttering like he did when he was young. He had just been laying in his room, thinking about how bad the last mission had gone. He’d messed up, hurt himself and nearly killed Hunk. Everyone blamed him… and with good reason. It was his fault, as it always was. Had he messed up so bad that Bob had to call him back? 

“Oh, dear, a little jittery, aren’t we?” Bob laughed, the invisible audience also laughing with him. Was that what happened to those heroes that didn’t make it through the game? Were they forced to sit in the audience and watch others fail and join them? “No need to be nervous, dummy.”

Ah, yes. Lance hadn’t forgotten how dumb he was and how much he was called out for it last time. How could he forget, really? He was reminded of it every time he spoke. He was dumb, it was no surprise. He always was and always would be dumb.

“This should be simple for this one,” Bob said. Lance’s legs began to shake, luckily behind his single podium. “With his fantastic breathtaking acting and all,” a screen came down, showing the “stripper” act Lance had to be a part of. He actually enjoyed that role, but right now, he was on a more reality show. He didn’t have a script or a specific thing to do.

“I…” Lance began.

“This is going to be different for the usual show, everyone,” Bob announced, and Lance’s palms became excessively clammy. 

“What am I doing here?” Lance asked for a second time, this time with tears trying to push themselves out of his eyes. He took a shaky breath in, which didn’t seem to make much of a difference in his shaky mental state.

He was already in bad shape. He’d nearly killed his best friend. He wasn’t ready to spend eternity in this hellhole. 

“Little Red boy, do you claim innocent or guilty?” Bob asked, his terrifying gigantic smile vanishing and big eyes filled with seriousness. Lance’s head began to fuzz over. He had to physically hold himself together, gripping at his shoulders with his hands. He took as big of a breath as he could.

“F-for what?” Lance asked in less than a whisper.

“Are you a bad paladin?”  Bob asked, the audience perfectly silent. A bead of sweat ran down Lance’s forehead, seemingly in slow motion.

“I-I…” Lance was terrified. He felt like he was spiraling completely out of control. There was an all too obvious answer. But was that the answer he was supposed to give? No matter the answer, he was probably going to be stuck there. 

“Hmmm…” Bob hummed for a moment. “Maybe this will be easier… are you guilty of being dumb?” 

“W-well… y-yes,” Lance stuttered out. He swallowed harshly. The screen flashed with a small “guilty”.

“So… are you a bad paladin?” Bob asked a second time. Lance couldn’t get out the word he wanted, so he nodded shamefully instead. “I think we’ve got ourselves another ‘guilty’, folks.”

There were gasps from the audience as the screen flashed with a large, red “GUILTY”. 

“Alright, now that we’ve gotten that out of the way!” Bob yelled. Lance’s knees buckled and he let his head hit against the podium while he gripped for support. He held that stance, his head lapping up the cool metal of the podium like a thirsty dog. He also allowed a few stray tears escape, quickly wiping them away from the podium with his gloved hand. “I say we have a little poll!”

Lance looked up, sniffling a bit as he stared in confusion.

“Exciting, no? Letting the audience join in,” Bob whispered towards Lance. “Who finds this dumb one to be, indeed, a bad paladin? And who does?” he yelled to the audience.

The screen behind them showed a blue screen, with the makings of a bar graph. The horizontal line was labeled by the question, “bad” and “good” side by side. The vertical line was labeled by number.

Rapidly, the “good” side of the graph rose. By the end, only one person had chosen the “bad” side. Lance seemed even more confused.

“Well, isn’t that interesting?” Bob asked Lance, exaggerating and looking kind of foolish up close. “Looks like there are only two people here that believe you guilty of being a bad paladin, dumb one.”

Lance stared at Bob, unsure of what was going on.

“Oh, wait…” Bob put his finger to his chin in thought. “I wonder how someone who’s such a good paladin could possibly be dumb… do you know, audience?” 

There were negative answers from across the room.

“Huh, it’s a mystery,” Bob sighed. “However… I do find something to be very dumb about you, Mr. McClain.”

Bob floated extra close to Lance’s face. Their faces were nearly touching. Bob’s terrifyingly gigantic eyes looked even scarier from that distance. Lance nearly stopped breathing completely out of fear.

“And it doesn’t have anything to do with that thing inside of your head,” Bob poked at Lance’s forehead. Lance nearly fell over, however, the hoverboard like contraption that held onto his feet kept him from doing so. “Can you take a guess as to what that is?”

“N-no,” Lance whimpered.

“Only fools refuse to discuss insecurities with comrades, Lance,” Bob said matter of factly, seriousness laced in his voice. “Audience, do you agree?” he asked as he finally pulled himself away from Lance’s personal space.

There was loud cheering from the invisible people in the dark area of the room. Lance’s eyes filled with tears as the statement sunk in.

“Go talk with them about your feelings,” Bob ordered. “And if you don’t, I’ll call each of them back myself and give them a glimpse of just how bad little Lancey’s mental health really is at this point.”

Lance stood frozen in time.

“Or I’ll just… bring you back and keep you here forever,” Bob laughed. “That’s, after all, my usual job.”

“B-but…”

“Good luck, the dumb one,” Bob waved.

Lance woke up in a cold sweat in his bed. Tears were falling like crazy. He’d… gone back to that place. And now, he had a job to do. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn't get to write nearly as much as I wished I could've during my break, so I'm sorry if this isn't my best. It'll get better, I'm just trying to get back in the swing of things. All of my breaks for work and schooling is over now too, which means that I'm trying to get used to everything that's now piled up again! I hope you all can be patient with me at this time!
> 
> Please leave me a comment, tell me what you thought. Give me some advice on Bob's character. I'm no good with subtle help inside of funny context, as I'm sure you all have noticed. If there is any good advice, any constructive criticism any of you could give me, please.
> 
> Like always, if any of you have any complaints, put them in the comments and I may or may not fix if necessary.


	24. The Dumb One Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> TechnoGhost  
> "here's another suggestion when lance feels like he's not meant to be a paladin, he suddenly returns to garfle warfle snick. After bob plays with him for a bit, he tells the real reason lance is dumb is because he keeps hiding his feelings and self doubt from the group. ( i kinda imagine as being wise while also being funny)"
> 
> This is the second part. Lance, as well as the rest of the team, get taken back to the game of Garfle Warfle Snick.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I decided to change the ending because a few of you said that you wanted it a bit happier. I’m not going to make any more changes nor am I going to continue this shot any further. I hope I fixed t to your guys’ liking.

Lance was going to talk to them. He was going to express just how he felt in regards to the missions, their relentless jokes on his behalf, just himself in general. The longer he thought about talking about it, the more he wanted to. It’s been said that sharing this kind of things makes one feel like a weight was lifted from their shoulders. He had 1000 of pounds of weight on his shoulders, he desperately wanted it removed.

However, his attempts were, for lack of another word, fruitless. Meeting after meeting, mission after mission, sleeping cycle after sleeping cycle. There really was no time for feelings, no matter how desperately Lance wanted to talk about his. It was a fact. They were fighting a war, and it’s not like Lance was the only one with problems, right?

His first attempt was the day after he got out of his second round of Garfle Warfle Snick. If he knew one thing, it’d be that he didn’t want to go into that game ever again, not for any reason. He went to Allura, obviously a mistake. 

She was busy. She was always busy. Lance didn’t even know why he went to her. It’s not like she would be able to understand the vastness of human emotion.

Then it went to Shiro, then to Hunk, to Pidge and last to Keith. And they all were too busy.

By the end of his attempts, he felt even worse than he did before. He tried, he really tried. 

The 1000 pound weight from before seemed to double on weight. Not only did he not complete what Bob had told him to do, but he also wasted everyone’s time for no reason. 

He didn’t want to talk to anybody other than the team. His family was biased and he was sure that they wouldn’t help him. Iverson wasn’t one for feelings talk and he never really liked Lance anyways. The others from the garrison were all jerks and would tell him that he really was the worst and that they should’ve found the blue lion before he got to her. He knew who would make it feel the best and it’d be someone in the team. They weren't biased and they’ve seen what he’s like during missions. 

Lance lay troubled, teary-eyed, in his bed. He closed his eyes, a few tears slipping from them. 

“And we’re back in another game of Garfle Warfle Snick!” Lance’s eyes opened to be in the overly colorful room. His eyes widened in fear. He wasn’t gonna be leaving this game this time, was he? He took a deep breath and stood up straight, like a plank of wood. He wasn’t going to panic this time, he knew that he’d disobeyed. He deserved what he was going to get. It’s not like anyone would care if he just disappeared anyways.

“Ah, it’s our favorite little paladin human,” Bob called and the audience screamed louder than they ever had. “Well done, dumb one. You’ve succeeded in leaving the dumb stage.”

“Wh-what?” Lance asked, the plank wavering and nearly falling to the floor. “Y-you said to talk to the others and I didn’t do that…”

“Indeed, you are correct,” Bob nodded while his big eyes scanned the ground and his mouth showed bits of amusement. The audience muttered quietly. “Let’s bring in our guests before we get started!”

There were 5 podiums across the room from Lance’s single podium. One by one, people showed up behind each podium. Shiro, Allura, Keith, Hunk and Pidge; exactly in that order.

“The rest of the team of Voltron is here!” Bob cheered as though it wasn’t basically Lance’s worst nightmare. The rest of the audience cheered as well. He took another deep breath, lungs burning. 

“Where are we?” Shiro asked cluelessly.

“What the hell?” Pidge growled, more than pissed. Unlike Lance’s immediate response when he was in this room for the second time, Pidge was on the verge of screaming. “We already won this stupid game! Leave us alone already!”

“Feisty little green one, am I right?” The audience snickered as though he had made a funny joke. “There are some things that must be discussed.”

Lance breathed heavily, this time a few tears dripping down on the podium in front of him. He quickly wiped them away.

The others finally noticed Lance, across the room, looking like his body was about to give way. 

“Why is Lance over there? What’s going on?” Keith growled angrily. Bob looked towards the 5 people, showing slight amusement.

“Because he wasn’t able to finish the task I gave him a few days ago,” Bob answered. “So now it is my responsibility to help. Too bad, though the audience is really excited, huh?”

The audience cheered so loud it felt like they were turning into static. Lance wiped his eyes again, more tears falling and falling and he couldn’t stop them.

“It’s fine I don’t need help,” Lance muttered as his tears continued to fall.

“You don’t decide that kid,” Bob turned to him, anger shown on his gigantic round face. 

Lance looked away, down to the podium that he was using to keep him upright. His knuckles were turning white from clenching at the corners of the podium too hard. He just wished he could’ve told everyone before this happened.

“We’re rather disappointed with this group of heroes, aren’t we, audience?” Bob asked and the audience booed. “After all of this work I’d done to get this poor kid to share everything with you, you just shot him down. I’d like to say I made a mistake, letting you be my first group to make it out of the game. Audience?”

The audience sounded off in agreement. Those who understood what was going on all showed their immense amount of fear, aside from Lance. Lance was just standing in pure despair, cupping his hand over his mouth. He felt like he was about to throw up.

“And I will keep you here,” Bob informed nonchalantly. Faces of pure rage and fury burned on the many faces of Lance’s fellow paladins. “Oh, don’t look so angry.”

“You let us go!” Pidge growled, voice lower than expected. “What’s the meaning of this, huh? What did we do?!” She slammed her fist on the podium in front of her. Hunk set his hand gently on her’s, trying to show his brotherly support. Hunk looked absolutely terrified, anger also seeping through a bit, but he wouldn’t let that control him.

“Hmm,” Bob looked up, giant eyes on the ceiling. “I suppose we should go through all the details before deciding whether you stay or not, right?”

The audience cheered in agreement. Bob turned to Lance, a question on his face. Lance was surprised to be given an option as well.

“Don’t keep them here,” Lance begged softly. “Please, they don’t deserve to stay here.”

“We’ll see,” Bob shrugged. “Want to see the details now, Lance McClain?”

Lance nodded hesitantly, eyes still leaking with thousands of tears. 

“Let’s start by looking at the poor Red Paladin trying to communicate with everybody, shall we?” Bob asked. The others across the room looked confused, looking between Bob and Lance. 

The screen lit up behind them. Everyone looked, even Lance. It went down the line, when Lance talked with Keith, discussing who was going to leave the team. The time Kuron yelled at Lance. The many times that everyone just shut him out of a conversation. The times that he was the butt of everyone’s jokes. And Bob would explain things. Explain why Lance wasn’t good at specific things, why he’d messed up at certain times.

During one clip that was shown, in the round with everybody, when Lance had messed up the names of people in photos, Bob explained Lance’s problem with faces and names. Another clip where Lance kept calling out random words during Pictionary. Bob explained Lance’s troubles with the English language when in stressful situations. Where he couldn’t quite register different words to different pictures and instead just blurted out whatever words came to mind, even if they weren’t right and didn’t really make much sense. The time when Lance had found the perfect reason why Keith deserved to be the one to leave the game, but all Keith said was that he didn’t want to be stuck with him for eternity.

But Bob didn’t explain what Lance felt. How Lance felt during certain encounters, how Lance felt about himself. Bob didn’t show any really important things that happened, those nights when Lance hid in his room, sobbing while singing his mother’s best lullabies. Or those nights when Lance sat in the bathroom with a razor or a finger up his throat. None of that was shared, all unsaid but shared through Lance and Bob making eye contact every so often. And the recent moments when Lance tried to talk with all of them, they weren’t shown either.

Lance felt everyone’s eyes on him at different times. He began hugging his body, terrified. This wasn’t something he ever wanted for himself, or for the others. 

“Now…” Bob said before clearing his throat. “What do you want, Lance? Do you want the next few clips to be shown?”

Lance looked at Bob, immediately knowing what he meant. Lance definitely didn’t want to, but what else was he supposed to do? Lance simply nodded, head falling to the podium as they played.

The last game of Garfle Warfle Snick, the game where Lance admitted that he wasn’t a good paladin, that he was dumb, started playing. It played just like last time, and it played the full game, all the way to the end. All the way to when Bob told him he had to tell everyone, that that was the reason he was the dumb one.

“Allura, can I… can I talk to you? I just… just a few minutes of your time.” Lance looked up, not surprised to find what was now playing.

“Really, Lance? I’m not in the mood for your jokes right now,” Allura growled. Lance, in the screen, nodded, fists clenching to the bottom of his shirt.

“Just… a few minutes? I really need to…”

“Not now, Lance! Go annoy someone else! I’m very busy!”

Lance whimpered, before walking away. “Sorry for bothering you,” he muttered.

“I really need to talk to you,” in screen Lance said through a glitch. “Do you have a minute?”

“I’m sorry, Lance,” Shiro sighed, only half paying attention. “I’m really busy right now. Maybe a little later?”

“N-no, it’s fine,” Lance shook his head, in a similar stance as he was with Allura. “I’m sorry for bothering you. Get back to work.”

“Alright, Lance,” Shiro smiled at him kindly. 

“Hey, Hunk, buddy, you have a minute?” in screen Lance asked Hunk, who was mixing up some ingredients in a bowl. “I have to talk with you.” Shay was just next to him, grabbing more ingredients.

“Sure thing, buddy, what’s up?” Hunk smiled, not looking away from his work.

“Can we talk… in private?” Lance asked. Hunk frowned, before looking towards Shay.

“Sorry, man, but I’m working right now,” Hunk sighed. “Do you want to talk a bit later when I’m done?”

“No, you don’t have to,” Lance laughed, shaking his head. “Just enjoy your time with Shay, I’m sorry.”

“You’re good. If you need anything, you know where I’ll be,” Hunk waved as Lance walked out of the room, wiping at his tears.

“Hey, whatcha up to?” Lance slid over to Pidge, who was sitting criss-cross on the floor on her computer.

“Working, leave me alone,” she grumbled, yawning.

“You should get some sleep,” Lance advised.

“Fuck off,” she growled.

“I just… I wanted to talk with you,” Lance muttered.

“Well, I don’t want to talk with you. Leave me alone already.”

“Ok, sorry,” Lance sighed. “Sorry.”

“Do you want some help with that?” Lance called as he walked closer to Keith, who was fighting a robot soldier from the training on Earth’s training deck. Keith was on the hard mode, which was equal to Altea’s mid-easy mode, which wasn’t easy by any means.

“Like you can help me,” Keith grunted. “Last time I checked you couldn’t even do easy mode on the castle.”

“Last time you checked was before you left Voltron,” Lance chuckled awkwardly. “Don’t sell me so short, Keithy, you’re gonna hurt my feelings.”

“I couldn’t punch through that ego with a nuclear bomb,” Keith joked. “You should just go before you get hurt.”

“I actually just wanted to chat with you,” Lance sighed. “If I beat you, will you give me a few minutes of your time?”

“Doubtful,” Keith answered simply. “Shouldn’t you be out there flirting with Allura or something?”

“I’m not just around to flirt with Allura,” Lance grumbled defensively, arms crossed.

“Oh, really?” Keith asked, sarcastic surprise in his voice. “With how much you do it, I thought it was the only thing you’re here for.”

“Yeah… I think that sometimes too,” Lance muttered.

“What?” Keith questioned, he obviously hadn’t heard Lance. Lance took that moment to back out.

“Nothing, nevermind,” he shook his head, before turning to walk away.

“You’re backing down now? I was ready to totally watch your destruction,” Keith teased, breathlessly.

“Yeah, I’m not feeling it anymore,” Lance walked away, waving as he left.

The screen went blank, and there was no longer any member of the Voltron team with a dry eye. Lance was wiping at his eyes, which had finally turned into a drizzle of tears, in comparison to a moment ago when it was full pour.

“Lance…” Allura whispered, voice cracking.

“Wait,” Bob interrupted. “I’m sorry, but with all of this sadness, I think it’s time for some fun!”

The audience screamed and applauded.

“W-what?” Hunk stammered, wiping at his eyes.

“It’s just a simple, easy question,” Bob muttered. “It’s not life or death. Just a little intermission.”

The others glared at Bob, angry with him for reasons unknown. Lance mused that it was because Bob brought out all of Lance’s problems, and now they felt bad for the comic relief. Lance felt a slight resentment towards the strange alien himself, but he was too preoccupied to care.

“Out of the 6 of you here, how many have died?” Bob asked. Lance and Allura both looked at each other, wide-eyed. They both looked towards Keith, who had the same expression. They’d heard one confession that Keith had died during a mission and he wasn’t sure how he’d gotten back. None of them had told the others. And well… Lance had his own secret involving death. Bob chuckled at the looks they gave each other. “Of course, you all are still alive… that’s not what’s important here…”

“Obviously, only one of us,” Pidge grumbled, pointing to Shiro. Shiro and Hunk nodded in agreement, believing that to be the facts. Shiro was the only one to have been noticeably killed, that was for sure.

“Well… actually…” Keith raised his hand guiltily. “It’d be two…”

“What?!” Shiro screamed as he slammed his hands on the podium. “Why didn’t you tell us?!”

“It was just for a minute,” Keith answered defensively. “It wasn’t all that life changing! I mean, there are a bunch of humans who have died and been resuscitated!”

“You should’ve talked to us anyways!” Shiro growled.

“Shiro,” Allura shook her head. “He did talk with Lance and I. If it was needed, Lance and I could’ve helped him. Just calm down.”

“Is two your final answer?” Bob asked, looking at each person individually. He glanced at Lance dead last. Lance didn’t speak, didn’t feel like saying anything. The screen flashed the number 3 in bright orange. “So close, but not quite, Paladins!”

The audience “aw”d in response. Some could be seen shaking their heads a bit. 

“Too bad, really,” Bob sighed. “If you all just cared enough to listen to one of your members more often, maybe then you would’ve known that.”

The screen started another clip.

“Hey, guys, what are we up to?” Lance asked as he walked into the common room in the castle. Everybody who was part of the team was there, Coran, Allura, Pidge, Hunk, Kuron. They all looked towards him, but didn’t respond and just looked away again. “Is something wrong? Did I do something again?”

“When do you not?” Pidge grumbled irritably. “We had a drill again today, and where were you? Nowhere to be found!”

“Oh…” Lance mumbled. “I was just taking a breather. I actually wanted to talk to you guys about something.”

“A breather? A breather?! What if that wasn’t a drill?! What if we actually needed you?!” Kuron roared. Lance flinched and took a step back.

“I wasn’t feeling all that good… so I just took Red for a ride. I didn’t mean to miss anything, I wasn’t even gone that long,” Lance spoke in a small whisper. 

“You were gone long enough!” Kuron growled. “We could’ve all been done for if that were real! Don’t take your spot on this team lightly!”

“I-I’m sorry,” Lance whispered. “I-I didn’t mean to…”

“You NEVER mean to! It’s always that you didn’t mean to! You didn’t mean to doesn’t help anything! Next slip will be your last, Lance! Don’t expect to stay on this team if you mess anything else up ever again!”

“Shiro,” Hunk grunted.

“Shut up, Hunk! You have no say in this! I’m the leader of Voltron! Now, get out, Lance!”

Lance wiped a tear from his eye as he slowly, shakily walked out of the room. When he left the room, he stood breathless against the wall.

The shot zoomed into his eye until it started showing a replay of Lance’s death in his perspective.

Lance lay floating in Red, the hazard lights the only lighting and screeching beeps blaring in his ears and resonating in the Garfle Warfle Snick room. Lance’s heavy breathing was an equal sound to the loud beeping and screeches of the inside of Red’s control room. Red was basically out of control, just a little left in him to survive maybe another blast. The oxygen levels were obviously nearly gone. Lance felt like he was going to break.

“A-anybody hear me?” Lance coughed, hoping to hear something aside from static in his ear. Nothing. Lance sighed. “I-I guess n-not.” Lance chuckled, coughing slightly. “Ready to go out with a bang, Red?”

There was a soft purr from the robotic cat, which was a surprise to the others across the room from real-time Lance. No other Lion had talked or made any noises with their Paladins aside from Lance with both Blue and Red. He just had a way with cats.

Lance pulled the controls on Red, turning her into an epic backflip.

“The others are probably….” Lance coughed. “Rolling their eyes right now. Shouldn’t make too much of a show out of dying moments, alright?”

Red whined softly and Lance laughed again, this time going into full-on cough mode.

“I… know… you want… to make a show… but… we don’t… want to show off too much,” Lance coughed between almost every word.

Lance pushed the controls, jetting Red forward and sent bullets towards upcoming Galra fights. He maneuvered Red away from a few more, shooting down the others just as easily as a newborn screamed. Then he noticed Blue in a perfect fire of a laser cannon.

“Allura’s in trouble,” Lance whispered before slamming down on the controls, Red roaring in sudden excitement at dying a hero. Lance smiled at his Lion before slamming Red into Blue, causing both Lance and his lion to cry out in pain. Then a sudden blue light enveloped the screen, and it went completely black.

Real-time Lance watched the clip, no longer crying, no longer caring. He felt a sudden, awful desire… a desire to finally, really give up. He shook his head: nope, not the time for that.

The others in the room, however, were in pure shock. Mouths were covered, tears were falling, just a room filled with pity and sadness. Lance didn’t really care about that, all he wanted was to talk with someone and for someone to give him some advice and some help. He didn’t go searching for someone to feel pity for him.

“And now that that’s over,” Lance spoke, his voice surprisingly not shaky or showing any presence of past crying. “I want to inform you all that I’m fine.”

“Don’t…” Bob started to scold but Lance cut him off.

“I know my own feelings,” Lance turned to him, finding himself not as afraid as he was before. “I can deal with my own problems. Everyone has their own problems and I just have a few of my own. It’s not important to get stuck on them or to worry others with things that don’t concern them. I may be dumb by thinking so, but well… I’ll be dumb if that’s the case. Don’t worry about me and my problems.”

“Lance, you should trust us with your troubles,” Shiro sighed. “We want to know what’s going on with you.”

“Are you kidding me?” Lance laughed. “A guardian of the universe had to get you all to actually pay attention long enough to know there was anything wrong with me in the first place!” Lance was screaming and laughing all at the same time. “No, what’s the point? You all deserve to be busy, you all are allowed to avoid me, it doesn’t matter. I don’t care! I don’t care anymore! So just go about your lives and just forget about it, alright?!”

“We… we can’t do that, Lance,” Keith shook his head. “We’re sorry, we didn’t mean to avoid you or to make you feel insignificant. We love you, man.”

Lance shook his head, not even having a need to cry. “Whatever, dude. I’m done.”

The world went black and Lance woke up in bed. He was slow at getting up, but once he was up, the bathroom was where he went. He locked the door, and sat, alone and in a small ball, in the bath.

He sat there for a long time, not sure what to do. His eyes dry but sobs still escaping from his throat. 

How long it was til somebody found him was a mystery. But when they did, their warm arms enveloped him into a warm hug like one he’d oh so desired for years. Not from a family member or alien species in his debt. But one from a dear friend.

“I’m so sorry,” Keith spoke softly as he squeezed Lance harder. “I didn’t know. Please... please forgive me.”

“Of course you didn’t know,” lance spoke bitterly. “How could you have?”

“I promise that we’re all here for you now,” Keith stumbled through his words. “I promise.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you all enjoyed. If there's anything any of you disliked or found disagreeable or you just think it should be changed, leave a comment and we can talk about it and I may decide to change it.
> 
> Please leave a comment with your thoughts. If you think I should write something with a better ending, tell me in the comments. We can come up with a good story where it ends a little happier.


	25. Wings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Look at chapter 21 for the first part of the story

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The last chapter, the suggestion that I had done in chapter 24, most of you who read it complained about the ending. I decided to change the ending to something else so if you haven’t read it go back if you’d like.

I glared at Haggar. That awful witch, I hated her with a fiery passion! 

“Keith, you take Pidge and get out! I’ll be right behind you!” I tried to wave him away. Pidge had gotten a bad hit from one of Haggar’s mysterious black and purple magic balls. It looked like her wing got clipped too, which meant she’d be in big trouble when she woke up. Keith was trying to wake her up. Keith wasn’t in a much better situation himself, and I knew that I could take Haggar for a while, or die trying. No complaints with the dying idea, to be honest.

“Like Hell I’m going to leave you behind, dumbass,” Keith growled, seemingly disregarding the unconscious girl on the floor.

“Real classy, dude,” I grunted as I skillfully ducked under Haggar’s stupid magic. She didn’t look to really be there, just some of her magic creating a… clone?... of herself. She was a little more transparent. “Really, I got this. Take Pidge out of here. It’s dangerous here, especially for her.”

“That’s exactly why I can’t leave you here alone. It’s dangerous,” Keith grunted as he flew up above. He tried (and failed) to make some serious wind with his wings to blow the bitch away. I rolled my eyes. If he just left, I’d be able to do that successfully, since my wings were like double the size of his entire body.

“Get out of the way, idiot!” I yelled as I ran towards Haggar, trying to make it before she threw some more magic at him. Haggar, thanks to that failure of an attack, had been given the perfect opportunity to hit Keith. I was too late to stop her from throwing the magic altogether, but I was there, getting the brunt of the electric ball. 

“Gah, fuck!” I screamed out as the powerful volts entered my system. It definitely burned my front, letting off a disgusting burnt smell. “Just get out, damn you!”

“I said no. Now you’re injured too,” Keith growled.

“I wonder why,” I grumbled, holding back pained gasps.

Haggar disappeared simultaneously as I shook from the after effects of the electricity. Next thing I knew, Keith had fallen to the ground, limp as a ragdoll. His small wings were bleeding out in slow drips. I shook my head sadly.

So Keith wasn’t gonna be able to fight anymore for sure. He was still awake, groaning and shaking violently out of pain. Which meant if I wanted to save them and myself, Keith would have to see my wings. Or somebody would eventually. Showing my wings to anyone was always a bad idea. But I couldn’t just let them die of course.

I sighed. There was no other choice really. I had to save them, no matter what came afterwards.

There were a bunch of sensations I felt in the span of seconds. First, the ripping of the skin that hid my wings. That would take a few hours in the healing pod to heal. Second, the immediate stiffness of my wings. It wasn’t horrible but after 14 years… Third, the awful burn like a fire in my right eye. It was the feeling that accompanied the change in my right eye color. My natural eye colors are the angelic blue for my left eye and a devilish red for my right eye. It was another reason people always feared me.

Those few seconds I was feeling all of those “fun” things, Haggar was stunned. She stopped her magic throwing, lucky me, and stared in pure shock. I could practically hear her thoughts of “Shit, this kid isn’t to be fucked with”. 

I looked over to see how Keith was doing. There wasn’t a point in worrying about him seeing my wings by now, since they’d all see them if I got out. Keith looked like he was about to faint, which slightly concerned me. Could it be that he was actually dying and I didn’t know cause I was busy with something else?

“Well, this is a surprise,” Haggar muttered. 

“Shut up,” I snarled. 

I pushed off of the ground, surprised by the strength of my own wings. It had been a long time, I couldn’t even remember what being off the ground felt like till now.

I spun in the air, warming up a bit. Haggar had started her rapid fire magic again, and I didn’t even think about dodging before I did. It was a very freeing feeling. 

After a moment, she stopped for just a second, apparently finding exhaustion in her rapid fire. I took the opportunity, the measly second, to use all of my wing strength to push her off her feet, the same as what Keith had attempted just before getting blown to bits. 

I smiled in triumph as she turned to static and fully disappeared due to the slicing power of the wind. A moment later, I heard the tiniest noise from behind me, thanks to the impressive super hearing I possess.

She came at me before I even turned in her direction. I felt a strong surge of electricity, accompanied by a knife carving into my side.

I screamed in pain and turned abruptly. My white wing slammed into her, flinging her to the floor a few feet left of Pidge.

I held onto the burnt, sliced piece of flesh on my side. But there wasn’t enough time to worry about that. 

I stopped flapping my wings, just kind of staying up off of a parachute affect alone. My black wing bristled, turning coarse. It had always been a strange little “talent” of mine. Feathers were only there to help the wings fly usually, they weren't any kind of weapon. But for some reason, my left wing was the exception to that rule, as it was able to send a cloud of black feathers like little throwing knives. Another reason to be feared, of course.

The feathers bristled in an uncomfortable way (kind of what I’d imagine a dog getting its hair brushed in the wrong direction to feel like) before I released them, aiming perfectly towards the witch still laying limp on the ground. Not one missed their target.

“You’re a monster,” Haggar groaned out as she bled all over the floor. That was almost too easy. I looked at her, confused. Then I laughed.

“You really are one to talk,” I grunted as I flew towards her, grabbing my bayard on the way. “Who’s the one who has killed thousands, I wonder? And for what? Full control over all the universe? Get over yourself, Haggar, none of the Galra would be any good as leaders of the universe! Nobody would!”

“Do you really believe that to have ever been my plan?” she asked in a raspy voice. She pulled herself to her feet, taking it upon herself to jump me again. 

I fell back, her on top of me as she stabbed her long, ugly fingernails into my forehead. I groaned. It felt like she was trying to get into my head, which I wouldn’t be surprised if that were the case. It took a lot more power than I thought it would be to pull the trigger on my gun.

She fell back, not before grabbing my bleeding, still steaming side. I screamed out loud. When she landed on the floor, she continued to grip onto my side.

Her long nails that had painfully embedded themselves into my head just a bit before had decided to force its way through the large, burning hole in my side. I had to hold my breath to keep myself from screaming again.

I weakly, carefully aimed my gun towards her again and shot her over and over and over again.

I waited a few minutes, waiting for any sign of life. Her nail still stuck uncomfortably inside of my side but was no longer moving. After a time of waiting, watching, steadying my own breathing, I checked for her pulse: there wasn’t one. I shot her one or two more times for good measure.

I had stayed, laying there, exhausted for a few minutes before I really started thinking what my plan was going to be.

I knew that if I left her there, we wouldn’t see the end of her. She would come back, even from this much damage, even more dangerous than before. I was more than aware of that. Which meant I had three people to carry back to Blue with me.

I stood up slowly and painfully. A few minutes I spent walking about, getting used to the pain, getting back into movement again.

Once I was ready I scooped Pidge and Keith comfortably in my white wing and scooped Haggar into my coarse black wing.

When there’s someone in both wings, I’ve found I can do a rather interesting process. I can will both mine and the person in my black wing quintessence into someone in the white wing. It has to be an equal amount for both me and the person inside my wing. It was a rather amazing process, I could heal someone if I had the quintessence involved and if the person in my wing had it as well. Although, to get that kind of quintessence is impossible. And using it all up can become rather dangerous. Meaning both of us could die and the person inside my white wing would have too much and possibly explode. That said, my wings equally contributed mine and Haggar’s quintessence to Pidge and Keith.

Of course, I needed some quintessence for myself. Thanks to a certain witch, I was having a bit of trouble regarding my wounded side. It was bleeding, leaving a trail that I was surprised nobody had noticed yet. But I wasn’t going to worry about keeping quintessence. Pidge and Keith needed to heal up as quickly as possible, I knew I could survive long enough to get to the castle.

As I walked to Blue, I noticed my disregarded helmet in the hallway. It was covered in dirt and grime. Keith’s and Pidge’s were right beside it, just as messy if not more so. They’d been flung off long ago, by one of the Galra who had gotten in the way of our mission, which had been abandoned pretty quickly. We hadn’t gotten the time to get them back before fighting Haggar. I grabbed mine and put it on my head while grabbing the other two with my wing, adding to the enormousness of my white wing.

“Hello? Hello?! Anybody there?!” I called into my helmet, which was a little staticky, as expected. My voice sounded raspy and sickly. “It’s Lance. Keith and Pidge need a healing pod. And Haggar is here too.”

For a moment, there was no answer. I thought perhaps my helmet got too banged up in the fight that it wouldn’t work now.

“Lance?” that obviously cut my worries short. Dear Hunk sounded worried to death. I chuckled a little, eyes dropping slightly. I was getting tired. “Lance, is that you? What happened? Are you alright?”

“Turns out Haggar was here,” I sighed. “Don’t worry, I’ll be fine. I just need a few healing pods ready and some way to dispose of Haggar once and for all. Can you do that for me, bud?”

“Can you get out of there?” Hunk asked frantically.

“Blue’s still here. I’m her paladin, I can manage,” I laughed. “I just need what I said. I’ll be out…” I groaned. Quintessence was running low already, at least for me. The less quintessence I had the more painful my side became. And the more it bled.

“Lance?” Hunk basically screamed

“Sorry“ I whispered. “I’ll be out really soon. Just worry about what I need, please. Just three healing pods and whatever can destroy Haggar. She could wake up at any minute and I don’t have much power to stop her anymore.”

“Yeah, ok,” Hunk stammered before there was a bunch of loud static feedback.

I continued to walk, quintessence still flowing out of my body and side still burning. It was starting to spread even, probably because of the magic. The more it spread the more worried I became. In fact, by the time I was in Blue, I set Keith and Pidge in the back room because I wouldn’t be able to let go of any more quintessence. Haggar, though, I left in my wing. I didn’t have the time or the energy to worry about her while I piloted to the castle.

“Lance?” Shiro asked as I concentrated on keeping myself awake.

“Hey…” I muttered, my voice hoarse. I coughed a bit, blood slipping out of it against my will. Looking down, I saw a long trail of crimson coming from my side. Or more like my side, arm and leg now. It was spreading fast and painfully. My head burned from the cuts made by Haggar’s nails. 

“You don’t sound too good,” Shiro informed. “You gonna be ok?”

“I’m almost there,” I spoke with confidence, even if I was having trouble doing something as easy as breathing by this point. “Are you ready to take care of Haggar once and for all?”

“She’s really with you?” Shiro asked, as though I hadn’t informed Hunk just a bit ago.

“Of course,” I grunted. “She has no pulse, but she definitely will be coming back if we don’t act soon.”

“How did you three knock her out?” Shiro wondered aloud.

“What does that matter?” I groaned. The wound had spread now to my neck. It was actually than ever. My neck was always sensitive. I recognized, in a fit of panic, that it may reach my wings before I get back. Although… after a moment of panic, my mouth turned up into a smile. “Keith, Pidge and Haggar are your first priorities, alright?”

“What?” Shiro’s voice was laced with concern.

“Don’t worry about me until you’ve taken care of them,” I said with full conviction. “I don’t want to be taken care of until after Haggar has been destroyed.”

“Lance…” Shiro whispered. “Coran will take care of you while we take care of her.”

“He can’t take care of three different people on his own,” I laughed. “Don’t worry. I’ll be fine. I’m coming in.”

I took a deep breath, before feeling a sharp pain in my back. I kept a scream from escaping.

“Shit…” I groaned. I parked Blue in her hangar, seconds later seeing the others in the team walking into the hangar. Shiro, Allura, Hunk, Coran. Coran and Allura had medical stretchers, or the Altean equivalent. Hunk was obviously still worried, Shiro noticeably in the same state.

I let my wing flop to the side, Haggar slamming on the ground beside me. The sudden movement felt like I’d completely ripped my wing from my shoulder. I screamed, screamed in pure agony. I gripped onto my shoulder, screaming, crying. Tears of pain flooded my vision.

I’d just allowed my wings out of their hiding place. My back was ripped and broken and bleeding. But… now my wings were being attacked by Haggar’s evil magic, burning and crumbling them into nothing.

“Fucking evil damned bitch!” I screamed out, coughing up blood. That’s when the others walked in.

“L-Lance?” Shiro called, fear in his voice. “Oh my god…” Shiro walked closer, but not close enough to be touched by me nor my wings.

“Take care of the others, damn it,” I shooed him away. “Go, before… she wakes up!”

“Coran, Hunk, take care of these three,” Shiro ordered. “Allura, the two of us are on Haggar duty.”

Allura and Shiro grabbed Haggar, careful not to get too close to me. They were gone in seconds. I gasped, blood dripping from my open mouth and onto the floor. My head was in between my legs as I vomited up the crimson liquid.

“Come on, my boy,” Coran whispered as he grabbed onto my less injured shoulder. “We need to get you to a healing pod.”

“What about the others?” I gasped and panted. “They… need one too…”

“We already took care of them,” Coran blatantly lied. I knew that hadn’t had enough time to do that. I also knew that I wasn’t able to fight them, so no matter what I knew it didn’t matter. “Come on…”

My vision slurred to a sudden stop, not even a moment to notice that I was about to pass out, not a moment to be prepared. Feelings stopped, thoughts stopped, mind stopped. I was completely out of it.

 

I came too hours later. I didn’t fall out of the pod like I had the first time. When I’d woken, I was careful to wait till I was balanced enough before walking out, a little dizzy.

My back was stinging like a thousand needles were jabbing into my skin. It didn’t feel like I was healed, though it didn’t feel like I was in bad shape anymore either. My quintessence had been replenished, only a little, but enough that I’d be able to bring it all back within the next few weeks.

Nobody was there when I was out of the healing pod. I didn’t really expect them to, who wanted to spend time in the medical bay waiting for someone to wake up? Of course, the sentiment of somebody waiting would’ve been nice, but… beggars can’t be choosers. Keith and Pidge weren’t in healing pods, which made me think either they were never tended to or they’d left already.

That’s when I remembered. My wings… they were out… they were on display. They were horrifying. My eye was red, head not burning with the red light that I was hiding within. Well, if that was a reason to be kicked off the team, I don’t know what is. Anxiety swarmed my mind. There are so many ways this revelation could go. They could turn into my parents, they could turn into my foster parents, they could turn into my teachers, etc and etc.

Hunk walked into the room. As soon as he saw me out of the pod, his face turned white as a sheet. He took a step back. I looked down shamefully.

“Did they take care of Haggar?” I asked, not wishing to bother with the elephant in the room just yet. I just woke up.

“Y-y-yes,” Hunk answered. He sounded terrified, rightfully so.

I hummed, nodding. “I hope so…”

“S-so y-your wings… huh?” Hunk stammered. Well, even if I didn’t want to address it, that didn’t mean he didn’t want to. I swallowed harshly.

“Yeah…” I sighed, looking towards my black wing, long and bristled as it always was. “What about Keith and Pidge? They’re alright?”

“O-of course,” Hunk nodded. “Th-they weren’t even harmed… just p-passed out.”

I nodded. I guessed it to be my quintessence. I did give them more than I could’ve handled at the time.

“I guess it’s time to leave,” I muttered as I looked towards my best friend, eyes wide with terror. I smiled at him, kind as I could. I started walking towards the door, which was right behind him. He gasped and backed away. “I’m just walking towards the door, bud,” I spoke calmly, putting my hands up and stepping slowly and carefully so he could see each move.

I was outside the door of the common room. Everyone was talking, Hunk excluded from the conversation as he was still in the medical bay. They were talking about yours truly, crazy enough.

“Isn’t it part of human belief that anyone with solid colored wings is dangerous?” Allura asked, sounding concerned maybe more so than someone who actually knew correctly the whole story of human’s wings.

“Yes,” Shiro said in confirmation. “Lance… he definitely isn’t safe to have around.”

“Guys, don’t be so close minded,” Keith growled. “We all know Lance. He couldn’t hurt someone even if he wanted to.”

“He basically killed our number one enemy, Keith. All on his own!” Allura screamed. “He seems capable of harming!”

“He killed our enemy!” Keith growled. “Why is killing an enemy so bad?! He should be congratulated! Haggar was the main threat the entire time! The whole war is basically over now!”

“This… this is not something to celebrate, Keith,” Coran muttered. “Imagine what he could do to us… we aren’t witches who have proved to be nearly unstoppable.”

“This is Lance we’re talking about,” Pidge scoffed. “Some of us have known Lance for years!”

“And have you seen how terrified Hunk is now?” Shiro asked, butting in, slamming his hand against the table. “Hunk has known Lance for the longest time! And if Lance was perfectly harmless to us, why did he never tell any of us about this?”

There was silence. They all thought about the possibilities. I looked at my own wings- horrifying, demonic, evil wings. I knew they weren’t going to be able to trust, weren’t going to even tolerate my existence. I was a horrific mutant.

“If you want to know, why don’t you ask him?” Keith grumbled angrilly. “I’m sure he’d be able to explain himself.”

I took a deep breath and walked in.

“Just cause I can explain myself doesn’t mean you’d really listen and understand,” I spoke calmly, unwavering. They all, each one, even those who were fighting for me, jumped and turned to me as though I were a monster. Well, it’s true, I was. “No point in fighting over me, ladies. I know the drill. I’ll be out by tomorrow.”

“What?!” Keith and Pidge screamed, loudly and angrily. They both still looked horrified, but they were also worried.

“I had hoped that maybe, just maybe, I’d find someone who didn’t get afraid once they found out,” I spoke matter of factly, though my voice hid the seriousness and was just purely playful. “I guess it’s just not something that can happen,” I shrugged. “Really is too bad. Guess I’m still stuck alone.”

I left the room, walking fast until it escalated to a run. Eventually, I stopped and broke down in the hallway, sobbing against the wall.

“Lance…” Keith whispered, sitting across the hall from me. “Hey… I’m gonna fight for you. Please… don’t leave…”

I looked up, watery smile plastered on my face.

“You’re going to fight for me?” I laughed. “You’re afraid of me too. After all, you decided to sit across the hall from me, tense as Hell. Don’t lie to me. How can you fight for someone when you’re just as afraid as anybody else?”

“I’m just… I trust you, Lance,” Keith sighed. I scoffed, rolling my eyes. If I ever hear those words, I only want it to be true. I didn’t feel the truthfulness in his words. “I’m just trying to get used to this. Why… why didn’t you tell us?”

“Why would I?” I laughed.

“Because…” Keith whispered. “Because we love you…”

“No,” I said sincerely, anger creeping up on my body. “No matter how much anyone loves me… no matter how much trust I build… no matter anything, anything at all. They take a look at what I really look about and everything’s gone. The fear takes hold instantly and anything I’d built comes crumbling down. Like some nearly indestructible building in a hurricane. Just completely, utterly obliterated!” My tears were slow and bitter and cold.

“Lance,” Keith sighed softly, in a calming voice.

“I know this situation all too well, Keith,” I shook my head. “It’s the same every time.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comment and tell me your thoughts. Did I do good? Was the ending too abrupt? It’s definitely the last chapter for this story, but if any of you want me to change the ending like I did last time, please leave it in the comments.


	26. Not a chapter again

I’m not gonna be updating this week or next week. I don’t have an excuse aside from not having a second of time to do any writing. I’m sorry, I will come back in a few weeks, I promise. I’ve been having a lot on my plate lately and it’s been making me really sick.


	27. Not a chapter (again)

I’m sorry, everybody. I know it’s been forever. I’ve had a lot going on with my mental and physical health. My family and I have been in a rough go lately as well. I also haven’t had much inspiration with this lately.

It’s just been really complicated. And because of that, I won’t be writing these fanfiction anymore. Maybe sometime in the future, if I ever gain any new inspiration, I’ll bring it back. But for now, it’s done.

If any of you ever wish to use one of my ideas, I invite you to do so. The only thing I ask is that you send me a message with the link so that I can read them. I’d love to see your guys’ interpretation of my stories and ideas.

I hope you all can forgive me for ending it so suddenly after so long without updating.

I love you all! I’m so glad there were people who actually enjoyed what I wrote! It made my day every time I got comments and kudos and bookmarks. 

If ever you need someone to talk to, you can talk to me on here or if another platform would be better, just send me a message telling me which and I’ll give you the information to contact me on it. 

Stay safe and stay alive!


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